Adrift
by Odyessus
Summary: A post-Battle of Hogwarts/End of Voldemort story predominantly surrounding Hermione. I would like to sincerely thank Felicity Danverss as my beta reader for this story. If you do enjoy this story, it's because she helped make it better. As always and forever… JKR owns Harry Potter, but I am grateful to be able to play in a small corner of that sandbox.
1. Chapter 1 - Aftermath

A/N: This is a post-Hogwarts tale surrounding Hermione. I hope you enjoy the story! I welcome any and all comments and reviews and I will reply to each. I would like to sincerely thank Felicity Danvers for her invaluable time and tireless efforts as my beta reader for this story. If you do enjoy this story, it's because she helped make it better.

As always and forever… JKR owns Harry Potter, but I am grateful to be able to play in a small corner of that sandbox.

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Chapter 1 – Aftermath

Harry was laid out on his old dorm room bed. He was too tired to take off his dirty and bloodied clothes or to even clean himself. He just wanted to sleep. He didn't want to dream of all the trials and horrors he had experienced in his 17 years of life. He wanted a long and dreamless sleep.

However, every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was the now still faces of Fred, Lupin, Tonks, Lavender Brown, and so many others who had died because of Voldemort.

_"No," he thought, "They died because I was here and they wanted to help me. Because I couldn't find all the Horcruxes fast enough."_

His scrunched his eyes together at the images flashing before him. He tried to think of other people or happier events, but those faces kept coming back, and even more, memories were surfacing. Hedwig's dead body falling after taking the killing curse, meant for him. His mind raced with the events of the last seven years speeding through his mind. Quirrell leaping at him in front of the Mirror of Erised trying to kill him. The agonizing pain of the basilisk fang stabbing into his arm and the burning pain of its venom as it coursed through his veins. Cedric's lifeless eyes looking at him in the graveyard. Dumbledore's body falling from the tower.

He gasped and his eyes sprang open in shock and fear. He leaped out of bed, his body now full of adrenaline. He twisted around the room as if looking for the source of his visions, but there was only him in that quiet room. He clasped his hands to the sides of his head. There were too many voices and images in his head and he moaned out loud with the pain of them flooding into his mind.

Even more images and memories inundated his mind…

Hogwarts destroyed…

Grimmauld Place nearly destroyed…

Hogsmeade nearly wiped out…

Sirius falling through the veil…

Snape bleeding to death in front of him…

So many people. So many places. Destroyed or dead because of him.

"Too much," he hissed almost as if he was in pain, "This is just too much." He fell to his knees and started sobbing in sorrow and pain. He had done this. This was all his fault. He brought himself under control and wiped the tears from his face as he looked out the window to the grounds below.

"Never again," he whispered to himself. He knew what he had to do, "Never again will I do this to anyone else. This is all my fault."

He straightened up and said louder in a solemn voice as he made himself a promise, "I can't be here anymore. Never again."

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Hermione was bone tired. The last nine months, no that's not right… the last seven years were finally catching up to her as she entered the old room she had as a prefect. She shed her clothes, which were beyond salvaging, and climbed into her old bed. The softness of the bed seemed almost like Heaven to her after spending nine months sleeping on a thin mattress on a cot in a tent. It took almost all of her effort to pull the covers over her and she let out a huge sigh of exhaustion. She laid in the bed, listening to the silence around her and was just about to succumb to sleep when she thought she heard a muffled groan. Her eyes slowly opened, almost unwillingly, as she tried to bring herself awake and then localize the sound.

She reasoned it must have come from the boy's dorm, where Harry was. There was no one else in the Gryffindor Tower aside from her and Harry. She suddenly felt a wave of panic and dread. Her adrenaline returned panicked energy into her body as she practically leaped out of bed. She quickly put her clothes on and headed out the door and down the steps. Halfway down she thought she heard a pop coming from where Harry's room was. She rushed down the last few stairs and stopped in front of the closed door.

She leaned close and didn't hear any sounds. She knocked on the door, "Harry?"

Silence.

She knocked again, louder, "Harry?!"

Silence.

"Hermione? What's wrong?"

Hermione turned to see Ron coming up the steps with Ginny, Neville, and Luna.

"It's Harry," she said with her voice starting to rise in panic and concern, "I thought I heard something."

The others gave her a curious look and she returned to pound on the door, "Harry?! Are you okay?!"

Silence.

Hermione pulled out her wand, twisted the knob and found it was locked. Her blood went cold.

"Alohamora!" she shouted and rushed into the room. She looked around in utter disbelief, "Harry?" she whispered.

Harry Potter was nowhere to be seen.


	2. Chapter 2 - Rejected Proposal

Chapter 2 – Rejected Proposal

_Hermione pulled out her wand, twisted the knob and found it was locked._

"_Alohamora!" she shouted and rushed into the room. She looked around in utter disbelief, "Harry?" she whispered._

_Harry Potter was nowhere to be seen._

*** 14 Years Later ***

Hermione was reading the minister's fifth draft of a proposed law to ban dark object usage. She put the draft down, grabbed her quill and began crossing out words and lines. She then re-wrote the passages to better improve the language and close any potential loopholes. Over the last 14 years, she has been the Executive Advisor to The Minister of Magic, which included her editing any potential new laws, regulations, taxes, etc. that the Minister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt wished to enact. She loved her job and was always enthusiastic about her duties and had quickly risen to the important position to which she currently found herself in.

She paused in her editing and looked at the enchanted wall in contemplation. The day was nearing its end and she started to see the beginnings of the typical evening traffic jams that clogged the streets of London. When she had first taken the office, she found that having no window was depressing. Within an hour, she had enchanted the wall to resemble a floor-to-ceiling widowed office on the 50th floor of the One Canada Square building, with a view of the Thames. She found that the view did indeed boost her moods and certainly was a talking point for visitors to her office.

Putting aside the events out her window, she returned to her editing and wrote out a few more lines. She doted an "i" and put her quill down. She read the passage she had edited again and mentally nodded her approval. Since this new law would ban many objects that were on the edge of dark magic, she wanted to make sure she did her best to avoid giving any potential dark wizards leverage to escape any charges if caught. Ever since her dealings with Lucius Malfoy, she had taken to heart how he manipulated the Ministry's legal system to his advantage and she had helped close almost all the loopholes he had managed to navigate when he was a Death Eater.

She put the draft down and sat back in her chair and exhaled loudly. She was tired. She closed her eyes for a moment and relaxed. Her moment of quiet was broken suddenly by a quick burst of laughter.

"Ha! Hermione Granger asleep at her desk? Who would have thought it was possible?"

Hermione opened her eyes and smiled at the person who had spoken. It had been her friend Matilda Alania. Matilda was the Minister's receptionist/secretary/scheduler… well, everything really. Hermione knew that Matilda did far more than just make appointments and take notes for the Minister. In many ways, she was another Hermione… helping the Minister to mold the post-Voldemort wizarding society back into prominence and effecting positive change.

Hermione remembered first meeting Matilda and how the other woman was at first awestruck to meet Hermione, whom she referred to as "A bookworm who knew how to kick some arse." The two had immediately forged a bond over their shared duties, but more importantly because of their mutual interests. Matilda had attended Hogwarts several years ahead of Hermione as a Ravenclaw and remembered many of the Golden Trio's early adventures. They both loved to read, both enjoyed the same types of music and both were passionate about house elf reforms. Indeed, when Matilda heard that Hermione had started S.P.E.W., she immediately grew excited and wanted to resurrect the group again. Hermione had to put a dampener on her friend's excitement by telling her the group was permanently disbanded because their major benefactor was missing. However, that wasn't stopping the two working to draft the first house elf equal rights bill for the Minister to endorse.

Hermione sat up, "I wasn't asleep. I just finished the new draft."

Matilda gave Hermione an unconvinced look, "Uh huh."

"Whatever," Hermione replied, not rising to the bait.

Matilda leaned against the desk, "I'm leaving."

Hermione nodded and placed the draft in its folder, "Hot date?"

"Depends on how cute he is," came the amused reply.

Hermione rolled her eyes. Aside from being somewhat mysterious, Matilda had a reputation for going through boyfriends like Hermione went through quills. Hermione at first had been shocked by her office mate's attitude towards dating, but quickly got past it. It was Matilda and Hermione accepted it.

"Wanna bring Kevin and make it a double?"

Hermione shook her head and then suddenly groaned aloud. She'd almost forgotten!

Matilda gave her friend a concerned look, "What's wrong?"

Hermione looked up at the dark-haired woman, "I am seeing him tonight and I'm…," she stopped talking, looked at the clocked and closed her eyes in realization.

"Already late," her friend finished. She stood up straight and made a tsk-ing sound, "Hermione. You have to stop doing that. You're lucky he loves you and is very understanding."

"I know," Hermione said with regret in her voice, "I'll make it up to him."

"Well sex is a great way to make it up to him," came Matilda's matter-of-fact reply.

Hermione snorted, "Maybe for you that works."

"Of course it does," Matilda shook her head at Hermione, "But fine. I'm only trying to help you apologize and let some stress out at the same time," she grabbed her purse, "Well, while you try and salvage your date… I'm off."

Hermione, smiling a small smile, watched her friend turn towards the door, "Have fun."

Matilda turned and gave Hermione an impish grin, "I'm sure I will."

Hermione again rolled her eyes at Matilda's innuendo, "And there's no need to give me the blow by blow either!"

"We'll see if that happens!" Matilda called out as she left the office.

Hermione gave a little laugh and stood cleaning her desk quickly. She hurriedly put some folders in her bag, grabbed her coat and rushed out the door.

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She practically burst through the restaurant's door twenty minutes later. She put her hand on the hostesses' podium and slowed her breathing. The hostess smiled at her and patiently waited. When Hermione finally got her breath back she looked apologetically at the hostess, "I think my date is here already. Deranti?"

The hostess didn't even look at her sheet, but smiled, "Yes he is, miss," she indicated into the restaurant, "This way."

Hermione followed the woman, trying to straighten her hair and clothes that had become disheveled from her running. She saw a handsome, tall, thin framed man with blonde hair looking out the window at the bustling London street outside. He turned, his brown eyes seeing her approach, and gave her a lopsided smile and stood up as she approached. Hermione immediately noticed he looked nervous or anxious, which was good because she was worried he was going to be upset.

"I'm sorry I'm late," she said when she got to the table, "I had to finish something for the minister."

They kissed briefly and he held her chair out for her. She sat and watched him return to his seat.

"No worries," he almost stammered, "I'm sure he appreciates your work."

She smiled, thankful he was understanding, "Yes he does."

"Wine?" he asked and she nodded. He reached out and grabbed the wine bottle and filled her glass. She saw his hands were almost shaking as he poured. She was curious as to why he was nervous as he was not a nervous person by nature.

"I ordered your favorite if that's okay?" he asked filling his glass.

"Thank you, that's perfect," she replied thankfully.

He held his glass up, "Well… four wonderful years," he said.

She held up her glass and for a moment wondered what he meant. Then it hit her… it was their fourth anniversary. She groaned inwardly. She'd forgotten.

She smiled brightly in reply, trying to cover for her awkward pause, "Four years… Happy Anniversary."

The clinked glasses and drank their wine. Moments later their dinner arrived covering her self-conscious feelings of forgetting the date even more. They ate and conversed about their day. Kevin was chattering anxiously throughout their meal, which was starting to worry Hermione.

When the plates had been taken away, she looked at him. His face had paled a bit and he fidgeted with his napkin. She realized that something was on his mind and that she needed to find out what was wrong with him. He had been anxious and nervous all night and never mentioned anything about her being late, which he always did. Something was up, and it was important and worrying to him.

"Kevin, what wrong?" she asked.

"Umm… well… nothing," he said looking now even more anxious, "Hermione… we've been together for four years now. Four great years!" he added quickly as if he thought she might take that as a negative.

"Okay," she said in a confused tone, not sure where he was headed with his thoughts, "Yes, it has been."

He plowed on not hearing her, "And well… we get along so well. And I love you a lot."

The waiter suddenly placed a silver domed covered plate in front of her. She stared at it in utter confusion.

"Anyways," he was stammering at this point, "I feel comfortable with you. It's amazing to be with you. And I was wondering… well… hoping really… that you might want to… well... you might want to be…," he trailed off then with a wave of his wand quickly removed the silver cover to reveal a small black velvet box on a china plate. The box was open and a diamond ring was sparkling brightly in front of her.

"What I'm trying to say… ask really," he nervously swallowed hard, "Hermione… would you be my wife?"

She stared dumbfounded at the ring in front of her. This was not what she was expecting. In fact, this was not even something she had remotely considered.

"His wife?" she thought to herself, "This can't be happening."

She looked, wide-eyed in shock, at him. Her brain seemed to be unable to make herself do anything.

He fidgeted even more now since she hadn't replied.

"I think you and I would be great as husband and wife," he said. Then when she didn't answer still he added, "I know we haven't really talked about this, but I couldn't wait any longer to ask you," he stammered with his lopsided smile.

Her brained finally kicked in, "Haven't talked about it?" her tone somewhat exasperated, "We've never talked about this!"

His face paled, "You're right. I know, but…."

She pressed on not hearing him, "And suddenly you spring this?"

His face flushed with embarrassment, "Hermione, I was trying…."

"Kevin," she looked back at the ring and then back at him, "We should have discussed this first. This is a huge step!"

His face flushed this time in anger, "That's all we do Hermione! We discuss everything! We never act!"

She sat back in surprise at his angry retort.

He pointed at her and continued in an angry whisper, "For four years I have discussed everything with you and we've never done something without some sort of analysis or research."

"I'm sorry, but I'm not an impulsive person," she replied, trying to keep her voice even.

"Impulsive?" he pointed at the ring, "You think me asking you to marry me was impulsive?"

She quickly looked at the ring and then back at him, her anger rising, "Well it's not exactly planned well."

"Planned well?" he sat back in exasperation and rolled his eyes, "Don't you ever not plan? Can't you, just for once in your life, not plan out something?"

She blinked at him. He was right to a point. She did plan and research and talk through everything. It was a habit since before she was at Hogwarts. She had only really been impulsive during what would have been her last year at Hogwarts when she went off with Harry hunting Horcruxes. He was wrong though that she did this all the time. She did do things without planning. However, spending her life with someone… that needed some discussion in her mind.

"I'm sorry," she said half apologetic and half indignantly, "But wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone requires a bit of discussion in advance don't you think? To make sure the other person is even ready for that type of commitment?"

He snorted in derision at her comment, "Not if you love that person!"

"Especially if you love that person," she hissed crossly.

He shook his head, "You're impossible," he sighed heavily and stared at the ring, "So you're not going to say yes are you?"

She sat back and folded her arms across her chest, "I'm sorry but I have to say no."

He sat there for a few moments in deep thought. She wisely remained silent. She wasn't moving on this. While she was very flattered that someone would think she would make a great wife, she still felt like they should have talked first. Finally, he gave a small smile and shook his head, "You're a piece of work you know that Hermione?" he waved his wand with an angry flick, snapped the box closed with a loud SNAP, startling her with the noise.

He stood from the table, put the box in his suit pocket and looked down at her, "You know I was hoping for a completely different reaction and answer tonight, but I probably shouldn't have been surprised by this," he took the last sip of his wine, "I can't do this anymore Hermione. I can't constantly be fighting your past and talking and planning my life to death. You need to decide what you want."

Her stomach knotted when he spoke. What she wanted? She wanted a lot of things. Her best friend back, to pass her house elf and creature equality laws, and a host of other things. Marriage wasn't a part of that when she thought about. Well, if she were totally honest with herself, marriage to Kevin wasn't in that future. There was nothing left for it then.

"Well then I think we should end it," she said resignedly.

"Wait? What?" he sat back down and looked at her like she was crazy, "You want to end this?" he made a pointing gesture from her to him, "Us?"

She paused to consider and then nodded.

He sat back in disbelief and drummed his fingers on the table, "Well if this isn't a bloody kick in the arse," he muttered darkly, "I was thinking we'd take a couple of days away from each other, think about our future together, and then talk. But this…," he stopped and shook his head in disbelief, "I can't believe it."

She hardened her expression, "I'm sorry again. But if you think you're fighting my past or feel constrained by my way of thinking things through then perhaps we should stop seeing each other. Because that is who I am. You know this and should be accepting of who I am."

He was silent a few minutes more before again shaking his head. He looked at her in disbelief, "Fine. Whatever. You're not seemingly affected by this all of a sudden which means you've already been thinking about breaking up with me. For a bit, I would say."

She tried not to let her surprise show. Had she been thinking about this? A few seconds of self-reflection told her that he was right. She had been thinking about it, although not with any real conscious thought. But to suddenly be told that and to have her mind react positively to it was surprising to her.

He stood and with one more look of anger said, "Well goodbye then Hermione Granger," he opened his mouth to say something more but closed and shook his head. Without another word he left the table and headed towards the door.

She let out her breath she had been holding and closed her eyes. This was not how she expected the night to go. Actually, it was the last thing she thought would have happened. A marriage proposal. Her refusal. And now… a break-up. Quite the whirlwind evening.

She took a sip of her wine and looked out the window to the people walking by. Kevin was right. She does plan things out and discuss everything. She had been that way even before she went to Hogwarts. Of course, once she was there and became Harry's friend, he relied on and appreciated her for that and told her so, which always made her feel special.

But Kevin… well, Kevin wasn't appreciative of her in that way. Oh, he loved the sex, and the notoriety that came with dating one of The Golden Trio, but that seemed to be it as far as she was aware. She never thought that he would love her at any level enough to want to propose to her. She knew he cared for her sure, but love? Marriage? It wasn't anything she ever had thought of with him nor did he really show.

She took the final sip of her wine and figured she should leave. After all, a woman being proposed to in a restaurant, no matter how private you try and make it, always seems to captivate the rest of the patrons. She figured, without looking around, that everyone had noticed the proposal and the resulting effects of her refusal. Such a refusal, which was not the expected reaction by the assemblage, would make the atmosphere uncomfortable for everyone. Hermione, not wanting to be in any more of an awkward situation, put on her coat and hastily made for the exit.

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She looked up wearily at her desk the next morning when a loudly humming Matilda entered. Hermione immediately knew from her friend's attitude that last night had gone the way Matilda had hoped. In fact, Matilda had that slight swagger of her hips that was always a dead giveaway for Hermione.

"Good morning everyone!" her cheerful voice sang throughout the office, "Good morning Minister."

"Good morning Matilda," came the deep, but polite reply.

Matilda walked straight into Hermione's office with an impish smirk on her face, "And good morning to you."

Hermione gave her a small smile, "I see last night went well."

Matilda hitched her hip on the edge of Hermione desk, "And this morning too."

Hermione just shook her head, "I don't need to hear about it thank you."

Matilda gave a huff of disappointment, "Very well," she looked at Hermione, "You look a bit peaked. You okay?"

Hermione put her letter down she had been reading and looked at her friend, "Not really."

Sympathy fell on her friend's cheerful face, "What happened?"

"Keven proposed to me."

Matilda squealed in delight at Hermione's comment, "Oh Merlin that's wonderful!" she clapped her hands together, "Well let's see the ring!"

Hermione held up her hand with a glum expression. The ring finger was unadorned. Matilda's excitement quickly vanished and she slumped her shoulders in confusion.

"Ummm… Hermione… I'm not an expert in engagements… but shouldn't there be a ring on that finger?" her voice full of confusion.

Hermione dropped her hand on her lap and shook her head, "I said no."

"What?!" Matilda exclaimed in shock.

"And I broke up with him," Hermione said with some hesitation in her voice.

"WHAT?!" Matilda's shock was even more elevated.

Before Hermione could reply, they were interrupted by the large and imposing presence of Kingsley Shacklebolt. He had heard the loud excitement and decided to investigate the cause.

"Miss. Granger. Miss. Alaina. What in Merlin is all the racket?"

Matilda gave the Minister a concerned look, "I'm sorry Minister, but Miss. Granger was proposed to last night."

Kingsley's face brightened, "Ahhh… congratulations Miss. Granger! That's wonderful news."

"She said no," Matilda replied deadpanned.

Kingsley's face immediately lost the brightness and went straight to sadness, "Ah… then not wonderful news."

"And she broke up with him," Matilda further added.

"And even worse news," he added quietly.

"I'm sorry Minister," Hermione said hurriedly, trying to sound reassuring, "It won't affect my duties I assure you."

The Minister's tone became reassuring, "Miss. Granger I have seen more serious things affect you and still, you handle yourself with aplomb and dedication. I'm sure this will not damper any thoughts I have of your abilities," he held up a finger, "However, I do think you should ensure that you're okay with being here after such a personal and emotional upset."

"I'm fine really," was her reply.

He nodded resignedly that she was unmovable in this, "Very well. I have to see some of the Wizengamot in a few minutes and will probably be gone for an hour."

Both women nodded as he left. Once he was out the door Matilda turned on Hermione.

"Spill," she ordered.

Hermione filled her in on the events of the evening. Matilda was surprised and showed it with her wide-eyed look.

"Wow," was all Matilda could say at last. Then she took in a quick breath, "Well I'm not sure that it was the best thing that happened, but it happened and now it's over."

Hermione just nodded. She then stood and went to the enchanted window, "I don't know Matilda. I feel awful about it, but it did seem like the right thing to do to say yes."

"Because something didn't feel right?"

Hermione nodded, "He's a nice guy of course, but I just couldn't say yes and live a lie. I don't think he really was into me as in love."

Mathilda contemplated her friend for a few moments. Both women locked in their own thoughts.

"Are you sure there's nothing else behind this decision?" Matilda asked finally, before moving off Hermione's desk and walking out of the office.

Hermione turned and watched her leave her office. She stood there for a long time trying to decipher what her friend was asking. Her eyes shifted to the picture on her desk of her, Harry, and Ron had taken just before the Quidditch World Cup. They were smiling and laughing together. Her eyes focused on the bespeckled boy with unruly hair and she smiled.


	3. Chapter 3 - The Party

Chapter 3 – The Party

"To the best seeker the Wimbourne Wasps have ever signed and to her winning their fourth straight world championship! To Ginny!"

"Ginny!" came the group reply to Ron's toast. Then loud cheers and wolf whistles drowned out any other sound for a few moments.

Hermione watched as her best friend blushed at the toast and the cheers. Hermione joined in and clinked her glass with Luna, as everyone did the same with those around them. She took a sip of her champagne as she looked at the large group gathered in the living room of The Burrow. Every Weasley alive seemed to be here. Hermione was amazed at the sea of red hair in the room that was only sparsely broken up by the occasional blonde, black or brown head of hair.

They were here because Ginny's team had won the championship as a result of Ginny catching the snitch in the record time of ten minutes. Hermione smiled as she remembered the image of the Cannons seeker was still floating in the air in utter shock long after Ginny had caught the snitch, unable to believe she had done it. Hermione, with the rest of the clan, had cheered so loud when Ginny held up the golden ball that she thought she might lose her voice. While Hermione still didn't like to fly and never really liked Quidditch, she was a fan of her best friend's career and success and was there to support her.

"Well that's not entirely true," she corrected to herself, "I do enjoy watching it, just never understood the rabid desire to want to play it."

For a brief moment, she was surprised to suddenly remember how similar this celebrating was when she'd watch Harry, Ginny and Ron playing for Gryffindor at Hogwarts and won the Quidditch Cup. The parties after each win in the Gryffindor Common Room were legendary. She shook her head of the memory and went to grab some food. She stopped in front of the large buffet table and of course, Mrs. Weasley had cooked enough food to feed ten times the amount of people that actually were there. Hermione spent several long moments contemplating the vast array of offering before deciding on a few small finger sandwiches, potato salad, and a slice of plain pizza (something Ginny loved).

"This is so embarrassing," came an exasperated voice to her right elbow, "I know they're family, but really."

Hermione laughed when she saw the reflected exasperated expression on Ginny's face, "They're proud of you and want to make a fuss."

Ginny rolled her eyes, "I know, but it's embarrassing," she turned to Hermione, grabbing a slice of pizza, "Did you see what Ron, George, and Charlie did after I caught the snitch?"

Hermione shook her head, she had been watching the Cannons seeker's face but smirked seeing Ginny's face get redder.

"They mooned the Cannons!" Ginny exclaimed, her face red with both anger and embarrassment, "Right there! In front of 100,000 people!" she closed her eyes in mortification, "The gits…," she grumbled furiously, "100,000 people saw my brothers' pasty white arse's."

Hermione burst out laughing at her friend, "Oh… I'm so sorry Ginny," she managed to get out.

Ginny shook her head at the memory and almost savagely bit off a large chunk of her pizza, "I swear I'll need therapy after seeing that."

Hermione sniggered at the comment and took a less savage approach to her pizza. They were soon joined by Luna, who was completely decked out in as much Wimbourne Wasps paraphernalia as was possible. Luna had always been regarded as a bit odd by many, including her friends, but most days that oddness didn't show. Her appearance today was one of those days where the oddness did shout-out in its fullest volume. The button she was wearing that kept flashing "Weasley is our Queen" was the icing to that odd cake.

"It was fun today," she said with her usual dreamlike voice and she picked up a carrot from the selection of dipping vegetables, "Even though we've done this so many times before, it's still an enjoyable experience."

Ginny snorted, "You didn't have to see my brothers' moon the other team."

Luna looked at Ginny with a soft smile, "I rather enjoyed seeing one of their arse's."

Ginny coughed in shock just as she swallowed and quickly replied, "Nope! Stop right there! I don't need to hear more about you and Ron."

Luna just shrugged her should, nowhere near being embarrassed as Ginny at mentioning sex, "At least your husband didn't get involved."

Ginny narrowed her eyes at the tall, dark-haired man talking with Bill Weasley, "That's because Neville knows that the only one who gets to see his pasty white arse is me," she replied with a hint of darkness.

Hermione sniggered again and took a sip of her drink. The sound turned both women now fixedly on her. Her eyes widened and her face paled as she quickly understood what was about to happen.

"Where is Kevin?" Luna asked, "I didn't see him come with you today."

Hermione remained silent but fidgeted with her food.

"Soooooo… no movement then," Ginny stated, then gave Hermione a questioning look when she saw Hermione's face twitch, "Or is it something else?"

Hermione took a nervous sip of her drink, "Umm… we...," she paused, not sure she wanted to finish her statement.

"You broke up, didn't you?" Ginny asked as if this was not a revelation, but a confirmation.

Hermione nodded and shrugged, "Wasn't going to work out anyways. He was…," she trailed off.

"Not sexy enough? Not tall enough? Not fast enough in the bathroom?" Ginny asked, trying not to get too irritated at her friend. She had long been getting annoyed a frustrated with Hermione and her almost predictable manner of tossing away perfectly good men. Now with Kevin gone, adding in the antics of her brothers, she felt sufficiently annoyed to address this with her friend.

To add to her disposition was Hermione's shrug in almost indifference and lack of reply to Ginny's questions. It was Luna, however, and usually, who went straight to the truth.

"He's not Harry."

Hermione speared Luna with a piercing look. Ginny swallowed her pizza and saw the withering look Hermione gave their friend. Annoyed as she was, and in perfect agreement with Luna, she waited to see how Hermione would react to that statement before engaging her.

Luna, to her credit, didn't back down from Hermione's look, "There's no need to look at me like that. We know it's true."

Hermione's look quickly faded as she realized the other two weren't going to back down and she just shrugged. Hermione remained silent about what she felt for her best friend. Ginny and Luna, giving each other significant looks, wisely did not press the issue. Well, at least not here. The three friends just ate in an uncomfortable silence for a few moments before a drunk Ron burst into their circle and draped his arm around Luna, nearly toppling them both to the floor.

"That was the greatest catch I've ever seen!" he slurred a bit and then pointed to Hermione. Well pointed somewhat in her direction, "Did you see her grab that snitch out of thin air Hermione? It was amazing! Like watching an artist create a fine piece of art!"

"Of course she did you prat. She was there. Five seats down from you," Ginny rolled her eyes at her brother before spearing him with an angry glare, "You're drunk."

"I am not!" he replied trying to sound indignant, "I'm not so drunk as you think I am."

Luna sighed as she wrapped her arm around Ron's waist and looked between her friends, "Sorry. I'll take him upstairs for a bit."

Ron gave Luna a drunken leer, "Ohhhhh… sounds like Luna wants to play with little Ron," he gave his girlfriend an exaggerated wink before Luna turned him towards the stairs.

"TMI!" Ginny shouted to their retreating backs, "And none of us wants to hear it either!"

Hermione smirked as she watched Luna try to steer Ron away from the punch when he made a sudden grab for more, which had been undoubtedly spiked by the most likely suspect… George.

"So is Luna right?" Ginny asked, breaking into Hermione's thoughts.

Hermione look at Ginny with a questioning face.

A look of derision immediately shown on Ginny's face, "Oh come on Hermione. I may not be the brightest witch of my age, but I'm not so stupid as to miss what she said as being true."

Hermione sighed heavily, not wanting to get into this, "Kevin was just not the right guy for a wide variety of reasons."

It was Ginny's turn to sigh heavily, "Oh Merlin Hermione… really? You've been with what… 5 guys in the last 14 years. And none of them lasted or were good enough?" she looked incredulously at her friend, "Really? All five?"

Hermione kept quiet, but Ginny continued to press. She began to count them off on her fingers, "Let see there was Michael Flannagan from Hufflepuff. After barely a year you dumped him because he apparently wasn't smart enough to hold a conversation according to you and couldn't stop being intimidated by you. Then there was Jason Hartwell… dumped after three years as he was not mature enough for you because he liked to joke with Ron and George too much. Mark Agassi… three years and you dumped him because you never really felt like you could trust him with anything. David Bradley… well after spending barely a year with him, he was just too needy according to you. And now Kevin," she looked at Hermione after holding up all five fingers, "Four years later, what was his problem?"

Hermione fidgeted with her glass as Ginny ran down the list of failed relationships and the reasons why Hermione broke up with them. Hermione finally understood why people always felt uncomfortable with her bringing up their pasts. Ginny's brief recount into her love life was nothing short of brutal. While she was right, it still didn't make it feel any better to Hermione.

"He asked me to marry him," she said finally.

"What?!" Ginny shouted in utter surprise and shock.

Hermione looked nervously around the room as people around them looked at where the shout came from. They regarded the two friends before sensing that it was nothing serious, or their business, and returned to their conversations. To Hermione's relief, the noise level returned to its previous loud level and the outburst was forgotten.

"He asked you to marry him and you dumped him?" Ginny's voice was full of shock and disbelief, "He was a great guy!"

"I know," Hermione said, "But I'm not ready for that and he knew it but asked anyway. We had a huge row because of it and we ended things."

Ginny smacked her hand to her forehead and shook her head, "Oh Hermione. You are your own worst enemy."

"Why?" Hermione asked, now becoming annoyed. This was the same conversation they had had many times before and it was trying her patience, "I wasn't ready. He knew that. He decided to not honor my wishes and I ended it. Plain and simple."

Ginny thought to herself for a moment, then asked, "So is Luna right?"

Hermione remained silent and sipped her drink. Ginny shook her head at Hermione in disbelief.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Hermione," Ginny said crossly, "Four great guys in a row and each willing cut off any body part to be with you and you dump each of them for quite honestly silly reasons."

Hermione flashed a look of annoyance and anger at Ginny but didn't respond to the dig her friend gave her.

Ginny slowly took a deep breath and exhaled, "Well it's your life."

"Damn right," Hermione muttered under her breath.

"Who am I, or anyone, to tell you what a total arse you are," Ginny finished.

Ginny walked way towards Fleur, who had waved her over. Hermione stood there thinking about what had been said. Ginny was right. They were all nice and good men and she could have easily been with any of them. But there was always something holding her back. Hermione never really knew what that hold-up was, although she did suspect the reason. So maybe Luna was right and that was the hold-up. Harry.

Hermione had always liked Harry but didn't realize just how much at first. Now, after years of self-reflection, she had grown to completely accept the iron-clad knowledge that Harry was possibly the only person that really knew who she was to her core and loved her unconditionally. She also accepted as the truth of the fact that she knew him to his core and they had trusted each other implicitly. And truth be told, she loved him unconditionally too because of that deep friendship and trust.

But since his disappearance fourteen years ago, she still had that hole in her soul where he had been. None of those guys could ever seem to fill that hole. They, unfortunately, suffered for it without understanding it was there or why. The one time when Mark confronted her about her resistance to taking things to a higher level, she had honestly tried to explain to him about her feelings. The results were not what she expected, in fact, they were as bad as one could hope. He immediately hated and distrusted Harry or at least the thought of Harry. Mark belittled him to her face about what a coward he was for running away and how unfair it was to him that he has to compete with Harry's shadow. The row was so epic because of her defense of Harry, that in the end she immediately distrusted Mark and their relationship's inevitable end happened not too long afterward.

One problem with what happened with Mark, or anything really, was that she didn't have Harry here to talk to her. To help her think something through. To listen to her when she was upset or happy. Yes, there was Ginny, Luna, and a few other friends she could talk too. But none of them would be the real support she needed when it came right down to it. Unfortunately, there was only one person that could be there for her like that, and unfortunately, he disappeared 14 years ago.

Her happy mood suddenly changed to a sullen mood. She had the sudden urge to leave and just go home and be alone but knew that would look suspicious and rude, and she decided to go out and get some air instead. She took a deep breath of air after she was alone outside. The warm early summer breeze felt great on her face. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the warm rays of sun on her face. Almost as if they were recharging her inner self.

"Too much for you?"

She jumped and turned on the voice, wand out. She dropped her wand immediately when she saw Arthur Weasley with his hands raised in surrender.

"Sorry, Mr. Weasley," she sheepishly put away her wand in her wrist holster, "Old habits."

He smiled and didn't seem to take any offense at having one of his pseudo-daughters point a wand at him, "No, I should apologize Hermione, my dear. I forget sometimes how much of a hair-trigger you kids still have from your unfortunate experiences."

He stepped up next to her, took in a deep breath himself and with a smile exhaled it loudly, "Love this air," he exclaimed happily, "Just invigorates me."

Hermione smiled, "This place does that with me as a whole," she replied waving her hand around to include the house.

He smiled brightly, "I'm happy you think so, my dear," he looked at her questioningly, "So then if this place invigorates you so, then why are you so blue?"

Hermione looked out the fields surrounding The Burrow and shrugged her shoulders. Arthur Weasley was a second father to her. She couldn't imagine how a man with seven children could still find it in his heart to accept her many years ago, a complete stranger except for the fact that she was Harry and Ron's best friend, into his family. But he did, and without a second's hesitation. It was a testament to his character that he, Molly and the rest of their family have such huge hearts. Hermione could not honestly imagine her life without The Weasley's. They were her family and The Burrow her home away from home as it were.

After a few moments, she took a deep breath. She looked back at Mr. Weasley regarded her with the soft smile and patience that only a father could have.

"It's been 14 years to the day," Hermione said and Mr. Weasley nodded in understanding.

"Still nothing?" she asked, with a slight tone of hope in her voice.

Mr. Weasley's job as the Deputy Minister of Magic allows him to see almost everything that goes on. The massive search for Harry Potter was something he had constant oversight into many years ago. However, nothing had come from the search, much to the sadness of Hermione and The Weasley's, Molly in particular. He had made a difficult decision to scale back the search effort after seven months as there was little headway being made and the Ministry's resources needed to be redirected to other areas, much to his wife's and Hermione's extreme displeasure. Since Harry gave her full access to his vaults at Gringotts before they left to hunt the Horcruxes, Hermione had even offered to cover the costs to continue the search. It had not been a happy conversation when he had told her of his decision. His mind suddenly went back to that conversation.

_"I can't believe you would do this!" she shouted at him angrily and she paced back and forth in his office, "Not only to Harry but to me and everyone who cares about him!"_

_He remained calmly seated in his chair and let the young woman vent. He knew that his decision was going to be extremely unpopular with Hermione, and based on the woman's reactions, he had been right. In fact, he was dreading telling Molly when he got home. She would likely have a similar reaction to Hermione's and he was sure his ears would not take the second round of shouting._

_"Hermione my dear," he kept his voice even and patient, "I know you're upset with me about this, but I hope you can understand why I had to make this decision. I cannot continue pouring galleons into searching for Harry when there's not been one single lead that has proven to be positive. Plus, we're stretched thin as it is trying to rebuild and keep the peace."_

_She stopped and glared at him, "So you're just abandoning Harry?"_

_He dropped his head and shook it, "No, I will still have Aurors follow up any leads, but I cannot have an entire division looking fruitlessly for Harry when they are needed elsewhere."_

_Hermione crossed her arms over her chest. Arthur braced himself as he knew from her face and body language the next comment wouldn't be good for him, "Sounds like abandonment to me," she said with an icy tone, "You've given up on him."_

_"Oh Merlin," he thought dejectedly, "She really does hate me for this."_

_He stood with a little ire in his voice at her, "No, I'm not abandoning Harry! Please tell me you honestly don't think I would do that to him?"_

_She bit her lower lip in momentary thought and finally shook her head._

_He gave her a quick nod of satisfaction at her answer, "Good. I know you know that I would follow up on any leads myself if that's what it took," he stepped around his desk and put his hands on her shoulders. He gave her a soft smile to try and help calm her, "Hermione, please understand I cannot have the safety and well-being of the rest of the British wizarding community at risk for just one person."_

_"Even though that one person put himself in constant risk of being killed since he was one year old to save them from Voldemort while they never bothered to raise a finger to help themselves and belittled him in the process," Hermione shot back vehemently._

_Arthur couldn't disagree with her, for this was not the first time it had been mentioned, and he would be the first person to support her comment. It was a cruel imbalance and had been for all of Harry's life, but Arthur's hands were tied. He waited patiently as he saw her mind work through her feelings and what he had told her._

_"What if I paid for the search efforts?" she asked in a much calmer tone, "Harry gave me full access to his vaults before we left to go hunt the Horcruxes, and he left me with more money than I could spend in ten lifetimes. I could continue the search efforts, with maybe a small group... four or five Aurors?"_

_Arthur shook his head, "I'm afraid that would be a waste of your money, Hermione."_

_She flashed him an angry look of indignation. She inhaled a breath to reply when he held up a finger to stop her, "Wait. Before you go off on me again, I'm going to tell you something," he leaned back on the edge of his desk, "I have come to the conclusion, based on the evidence of the search and knowing Harry for all these years that if he doesn't want to be found, then there is no power on earth that will aid us in that endeavor."_

_He paused for a beat and watched her face and just when he saw her face flush he continued, "And I'm sure I know you well enough to know that you have come to that conclusion too."_

_She continued to bite her lower lip. She hated to admit it, but Arthur was right. She had come to that conclusion weeks before, but her conscious mind forced it down deep in her thoughts because she wanted to find him._

_"So, when I say don't waste your money, I mean that it would be wasted," he said, "We just have to sit back and let Harry come to us," he looked at her intently, but said in a soft knowing tone, "You know that we have no other choice."_

_She huffed in frustration and looked at him. He bore the brunt of her hard stare at him and returned her expression with the calm patience of a man with seven children and years of marriage to Molly. The only sound in the office for several minutes was the ticking of a clock and her angry breathing._

_She finally gave him a nod of acceptance. He let go of the breath he was surprised to find he had been holding as she had been thinking, "That's my girl," he said with a little lightness in his tone, "Harry will be back with I'm sure of it, but when he's ready. We just have to be ready when he shows up again."_

He pulled himself from his memory, returning to the present and replied, "No, I'm afraid not my dear," he sighed quietly, looking out at the empty field, "But we're still following up on what leads we can."

Hermione nodded. She knew just as well as Arthur that finding Harry now would be a miracle to rival many muggle legends. However, Arthur was true to his word and sending Aurors out to investigate any leads, but they always proved to be false leads.

"He should be here," Hermione stated.

Arthur just nodded but remained silent. There wasn't a week that had gone by in the last 14 years that he didn't think about Harry. His wife was particularly distraught after hearing Harry had disappeared. She had lost one son to the war, and with Harry's sudden disappearance, she felt as if she had lost a second son. Arthur felt the same way. He had loved Harry as one of his own from the moment he met him and had their discussion about rubber ducks. He knew that Harry vanished for a reason, but he also knew that they couldn't dwell too much on the past.

"So, where's Kevin?" he asked, changing the subject.

Hermione spent a few moments to explain to him what happened. In the end, Mr. Weasley nodded and shrugged.

"I understand Hermione. It was a tough conversation I'm sure."

"Yes, it was and thank you for understanding," Hermione replied. She looked back towards the house, "Although some would think I'm being a prat for letting him go."

Mr. Weasley's eyebrow cocked upwards, "Oh really? And why would some say that?"

Hermione rolled her eyes as she looked out on the empty field, "They think it's because I love Harry."

"And are they right?" he asked in a tone that had some mirth in it.

"No! Not really," she exclaimed immediately. She turned to him and she saw the face of a father with the knowing expression that one of his children about to reason their way into the answer of yes, but try and fight it never the less. She started to stammer when she saw his face and her shoulders slumped in defeat. She finally admitted, "Yes… I love Harry."

His smile widened a little bit, "That is great to hear my dear."

She smiled a little at the euphoric feeling of her revelation, "It is, but it's equally sad because I can't tell him," she looked sadly out at the field of a maze, "He disappeared before we could talk and he doesn't know how I feel."

His smile faded a bit, but he added conviction to his voice, "Don't sell Harry short my dear. He's a smart man. He knows how you feel I'm sure."

"Well if he did, it wasn't a powerful enough force to keep him here," she said bitterly.

Arthur paused for a moment, "Hermione, Harry's reasons for disappearing are a mystery that at the moment we cannot solve. But I would not color your feelings and memories because you feel that he didn't care for you or anyone enough to stay," he replied with a bit of an edge to his voice, "And until he shows back up again, we cannot fall into the trap of painting him in such a negative light so as to not care about him. I've said many a time to Molly that if he were to suddenly appear on this doorstep that we would welcome him home with open arms and no hard feelings."

His voice softened, "So try not to be too hard on him, others, or yourself."

She nodded, "I'll try."

"And as for Kevin. Good riddance I say," his face and voice full of humor, "The man didn't even know what an escalator is. Any man that doesn't know what that is, is definitely not worthy of the great Hermione Granger."

Hermione laughed in spite of herself as his comment. As always when they spoke, she did feel a little better. Arthur did always have that way with people, especially with his children. He had been a great source of guidance and advice for her since Harry left.

He placed a comforting arm around her and gave her a tender squeeze as they gazed out, "Be patient my dear. We all need to be patient. Time hasn't had her say yet in this. And when she does, we must be ready. Now…" he removed his arm and put it out to her and lighten his tone, "why don't we put on our brave faces and rejoin this wildly outrageous crowd? What do you say?"

She nodded and took his arm as they went back into the party.


	4. Chapter 4 - An Unexpected Visitor

Chapter 4 – An Unexpected Visitor

It had been a long, hard week for Hermione as she hurried down the lane from the Ministry. Three months after the celebratory party at The Burrow, Hermione had buried herself in her work to try and forget Kevin, Harry, and avoid Ginny hounding her. Now she was looking forward to her night with her parents and made sure she was finished on time and bolted out the door even before Matilda could say "'Night!". She stopped by the roadside and waited patiently with a small crowd of Londoners waiting to cross the street. She looked quickly at her watch and gave a frustrated growl. She was late despite leaving on time. She looked at the crosswalk light in annoyance, willing it to turn so they could cross. If it wasn't so busy with traffic and she would have been run over, she might have tried crossing on her own.

Finally, the traffic light stopped traffic and crosswalk light turned to allow the now large group of pedestrians to cross the road. Hermione practically ran across the road and once across turned right and briskly walked towards the rendezvous spot where her parents undoubtedly were waiting.

After the war ended, Hermione had traveled to Australia and helped restore their memories. After a few minutes of a rather angry conversation between the three, where she had explained in detail why she did what she did, her parents grudgingly had accepted what she had done and her reasons for it. However, they had also decided to remain behind in Australia and continue their dental practice they had started there. Hermione was relieved that they had enjoyed their time there enough to want to stay but was equally saddened that they didn't want to come back to England. As they sold their practice in London before they left, there was nothing tying them to England except Hermione and she could easily apparate to Australia anytime she desired. So, it made sense that they decided to stay in Australia.

She pulled her coat tighter to her when a cool breeze blew by her. She ran a couple of steps before slowing back to a brisk walk. It had been a few months since she had seen them last. They told her they had news for her, but didn't say what, and she was excited to know what that news was. She wondered for the hundredth time what they could possibly want to tell her that required them to travel all the way from Australia. As she ran down the possible list of reasons, she saw them wave from the corner and she smiled brightly and waved back enthusiastically. They smiled just as brightly.

She quickened her pace and wrapped them both up in a big hug when she finally reached them, "Oh it's so good to see you both again!" she exclaimed through the hug.

"Oh it's so good to see my girl!" her mother Emma replied enthusiastically returning her daughter's hug.

"How's my Princess?" her father asked with a large smile as he looked at her, "That minister of yours working you too hard?"

"No," Hermione laughed, "It's hard work, but rewarding."

"Uh-huh," he replied with a smirk, "How's Kevin?"

Hermione's face dropped, "Umm, well…"

"You broke up?" her mother said with a look and tone of sympathy.

Hermione nodded, her face darkened with sadness, "Yes."

"What happened?" her mother asked, her voice both sad and concerned.

"It's a long story," Hermione said with a tired sigh. Wanting to change the subject, she hooked her arm in her father's arm, "And I'm hungry."

"Food! Right!" her father immediately replied, sensing his daughter's wish to change subjects, "This way. Your mother and I saw a new French restaurant a couple of blocks from here that we thought might be interesting to try."

"La Table de Poisson?" Hermione asked.

"You've been there?" he asked looking down at her as they walked down the sidewalk.

Hermione nodded, "I've gone at least once a month with Matilda for the last couple of years."

"Ahh," her father replied. He then tried to sound downtrodden, "So it's not new."

Hermione picked up the mirth in her father's voice and smiled, "For you, yes. But it is good food and I think you both will love it! They have a great baked sole hollandaise."

"Brilliant!" her father replied, then winked Emma, "Ringing endorsement from our daughter, Em."

Emma smiled, "I'm sold. If it that good we'll have to come back more often."

"That'll be hard to do when you're in Australia," Hermione immediately replied without thinking. When no reply came, she looked between her mother and father and saw them both with knowing smirks on their faces. She stopped them dead in the middle of the sidewalk in shock.

"You're serious?" Hermione asked looking between them hopefully.

Her mother nodded with a bright smile, "Yes, my dear. Your father and I have decided to move back to England, Islington in fact."

Hermione almost squealed in excitement as she wrapped both her parents in another hug, "That's so perfect!"

Her parents laughed at their daughter's reaction. Hermione pulled away, "When do you move?"

"Two weeks ago," her mother replied, her mouth quirked upwards.

"We just flew back from selling the practice and the house in Australia a week ago," her father added.

"Two weeks and now you tell me?" Hermione asked stunned and slightly offended.

"No slight against you Princess," her father quickly replied, "We just wanted to make sure we moved in and were settled before we said anything."

"I could have helped," Hermione said, again slightly offended.

Her father put his arm around his daughter and they started walking again, "I know, but it's okay and we wanted to surprise you that we were actually here."

Hermione gave her father a quick kiss on the cheek before smiling, "Thanks. It'll be great to have you back here," she gave them a curious look, "Wait… you sold your practice here. What will you do?"

"Oh we're still dentists, my dear," her mother replied, "But thanks to our practice in Australia, the money from selling it, and some investments we've made, your father and I are in no need to be full-time dentists."

"So we're working part-time with Dr. Jansen in his practice three days a week," her father finished, "You remember him right?"

Hermione nodded. Dr. Jansen had known The Grangers for almost 20 years. She was happy that he would want them to work in his office.

"It's just so brilliant you're both back here," she said again.

"Your father and I were going to look in at our old house later if you'd like to come," her mother said with a slight hesitation in her voice, "We're going to sell the property."

Hermione nodded in agreement. The Ministry of Magic had helped her secure the property from being sold in the muggle world as part of her reward for helping to defeat Voldemort. Hermione had told her parents they still owned the land when she had first returned their memories. Of course, they had both been devastated to learn the house had been destroyed by Voldemort's Death Eaters in revenge for Hermione's ruse. But Hermione had assured them what remained of the house was safe from looters and that a powerful ward had been erected for that reason.

"Sure," Hermione said with a slight hesitation in her voice, "You don't want to rebuild?"

Her mother shook her head, "No. Too many bad memories," she gave her daughter a sideways look, "For all of us I think."

Hermione again nodded, "Yes. Why don't I apparate us there after dinner?"

Her parents gave each other a disconcerting look. Hermione let out a short laugh, "Oh come on! It's perfectly safe."

"Oh it's not that we don't trust you, Princess," her father quickly said, trying to cover-up their worry, "It's just… well…"

She gave them a smirk, "I won't apparate you into a building if that's your worry."

"Ah well," her father stammered, "More like I don't want to appear with no clothes is my concern."

Hermione's laugh returned a laugh from her parents, "Ok, we'll do it, Princess," he said, "After dinner then."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hermione apparated them to the abandoned lot of their old home. The first thing they saw was the remains of a half-destroyed home in the middle of the neighborhood. Emma put her hand over her mouth as she gasped in horror at the sight of her home in ruins.

"Good Lord," Dan breathed in shock, "This is beyond repair!"

Hermione nodded, "As I told you," her voice lowered, "It's even worse inside."

The three approached and carefully entered the house. Debris was scattered everywhere. Pictures were half-burned in broken and twisted frames. All the windows were blown out. And there wasn't a single piece of furniture that wasn't damaged or destroyed. For many silent minutes, the Granger Family stood in the rubble and gaped, wide-eyed at the amount of damage the angry Death Eaters had done when they knew Hermione's parents had fled.

Hermione went over to look out the shattered back sliding doors while her mother picked up one of the many photo frames and wiped out of the years of filth to try and see what the picture was of. The photo disintegrated under her touch before she could figure out what it was of. She sighed wearily and softly put the battered frame back on the floor and stood up, wiping her hands on her jeans.

"Hermione," he mother looking at her daughter, "What caused this?"

"I caused this," came a voice from the destroyed front entryway.

All three turned, startled at the sudden voice. They were greeted by the figure of a dirty, ragged, and pale man standing to look at what was left of their home. Though there was very little of him that could be called a man. But it was not his appearance, but the pain and anger in his tired face, which rendered them speechless. They were silent until Hermione's gasp came as she recognized the man.

Even though his long, unkempt hair and beard. His threadbare, worn and battered clothing that practically just hung on his thin body. She still recognized her best friend. Harry James Potter, or what was left of him, was standing in her house and in her presence after 14 years of absence.

"Harry," she breathed in shock almost inaudibly. She looked as if she was seeing a ghost.

The man never acknowledged her, but again looked around the Granger's destroyed home. As he looked, he knew he stood in a place that should never have been affected in this way if he had not saved the life of the woman standing across the room from him.

"I caused all of this," he repeated in a hoarse whisper.

Dan and Emma Granger looked at each other with pensive looks before turning their gaze on their daughter. Hermione stood stock still, looking at the ragged man and no words were coming out of her still open mouth. For the first time in her life, Hermione Granger was completely dumbstruck and unable to move.

Dan Granger seemed the only one to be able to speak, "Ummm… who are you?"

The emerald green eyes of the man locked on him. There was something familiar in Dan's memory about this man, but he just couldn't place it yet.

"I was at one time called Harry," the man said. The bitterness in the voice at the speaking the name was not lost on Dan as he watched Harry take one more step inside the house. Then his mind suddenly remembered the only Harry he really knew of. But this… person in front of him didn't look like the young man he had seen year after year when they would pick Hermione up at King's Cross.

Dan flashed a look at his daughter, who was staring in shock at the man in the doorway, and saw in her eyes the truth of who he suspected this man to be. He looked at his wife with a baffled "what now?" look and was met with a cautious expression. He turned back to Harry and gave the young man a warm smile and stepped slowly towards him.

"Well Harry," he held out his hand to the man and spoke in a soft and warm tone, "I think I remember you when we met many years ago at that magical bookshop. It's good to see you again son."

Harry's eyes narrowed and his face darkened, "I am not your son," he said emphasizing each syllable in a voice bitter with emotion.

Dan awkwardly lowered his ignored hand and nodded, "Of course," he replied in a neutral tone, "I'm sorry. What brings you here then Harry? You said you caused this?"

"Yes, I caused this," came the simple reply, "And I need to apologize for doing this to you."

"Why do you think you caused this?" Emma said now standing next to her husband, "Hermione said it was the Death Eaters who did this."

"But I was the reason why!" Harry snapped back, eyes flashing with fury, "Without me, none of this would have happened!"

Dan looked at Emma and gave a slight shake of his head. Harry was angry and they needed to try and calm him, "Harry… you do realize that none of this is your fault," he said in a calm and soft tone as he waved his hands around the destroyed house.

"It is my fault!" Harry angrily snapped back before stepping back towards the door, "Because I saved her life in my first year at Hogwarts and we became friends," he pointed at the still rigidly standing Hermione, "And because of that I put her in danger from that time forward and made her a target for Voldemort and his Death Eaters," he looked back at Dan and Emma, "And in turn put you in danger and…," he stopped talking suddenly, looked away at some unseen memory and then whispered, "I… I put everyone in danger…"

Silence descended between them and Harry shook his head, "You don't understand," he muttered with barely contained rage, "No one understands," he flashed Hermione a look and whispered, "What does it matter anyway. I caused this. My fault."

He started backing up towards the door before stopping suddenly. He looked between Dan and Emma, "I'm sorry for everything," he said with weariness in his tone that Emma was certain meant the man would collapse where he stood," I wish there was some way to undo all of this. To go back to… back to…," he trailed off and stood silently in front of them. His head dropped in the same weariness that was in his voice. He was unable to meet their eyes because of the painful guilt and shame that was overwhelming him.

Then he looked up and the strength in his voice returned, but it wasn't harsh. It was almost a sad whisper, "I just wanted to apologize for all the misery I brought into your lives before I…," he stopped and unable to say more just gave them a quick nod and turned to leave.

"Wait! Harry…," Dan stepped forward, "Before you what?"

Harry ignoring Dan's question, walked out the door and disappeared into the night.

Dan and Emma looked at each other with shocked expressions before turning to their daughter. Hermione's face was white as snow. She hadn't moved a muscle or spoken during Harry's surprise visit. Now they saw their daughter slowly have her reason and understanding return to her. Neither knew who moved first, but they both rushed to catch Hermione before she collapsed in a heap on the floor.

The moment Hermione was wrapped in her mother arms the dam of emotion suddenly flooded from her. Hermione sobbed uncontrollably. Her body shaking violently in their arms. They just held her, unable to do anything more. Emma softly stroked her hair and whispered, "It's okay, Hermione" over and over as she softly rocked her daughter. Dan, silently kneeling next to them, just rubbed Hermione's back comfortingly, but looking between his daughter and the empty doorway. For a long time, in the midst of their old shattered home, their daughter just wracked with sobs and emotion and they just sat with her.

Sometime later, both Dan and Emma didn't know when, Hermione stopped crying and was trying to breathe in ragged breaths. Emma felt her daughter's hands still trembling with emotion as she gripped her mother. Hermione just stayed in her mother's arms and looked at the spot where her best friend, a man who had disappeared from the world, once stood. It was a painful eternity for the two adults to just sit there and do nothing while Hermione's logical, orderly, and rational mind tried to recover from this shock.

"Why?"

Emma was shaken from her reveries by the barely audible question, "Sweetheart?"

"Why, Mum?"

Emma looked at her husband who imperceptibly shrugged his shoulders, not comprehending the question, "Why what Hermione?"

"Why is he like that? He's not the Harry I remember."

Emma thought for a few moments trying to understand the question and how best to answer, "I honestly don't know Sweetheart. You've spoken to us a lot about Harry and everything he's had to endure. It's possible that he reached his breaking point. Everyone does as some point," she looked at her husband for his support.

Dan nodded understanding his wife's silent plea for help, "Princess, your mother's right. I'm sure you haven't told us half of what Harry's been through in his life," he took a deep breath, "But from what you have told us, I'm surprised that he hasn't been overcome by the pressure when he was much younger. It must have been immense at times and that intense pressure for that long period of time affects someone to their soul. In Harry's case, his soul must have reached its limit at some point."

"Then I've lost his soul," Hermione whispered, still staring the empty spot.

"Oh Hermione," Emma said softly, "You haven't lost his soul. He's lost that a long time ago from the looks of it. Your Father's right, the amount of pain and suffering he's felt growing up and during the war probably mounted upon him and with no way to release it he kept it inside. He kept it inside and it chipped away at his core and until it finally consumed him."

"And there was nothing anyone, not even you, my sweet and noble girl, could have done to stop that," Dan said sadly.

Hermione stayed silent for a couple of minutes, "But I was there, Dad. I should have seen the pain. I should have done more. He knew I was willing to be there for him. We shared everything between us. All he had to do was ask for help."

Dan sighed and dropped his head. He knew what she was saying, but had no ready answer that could help. He raised his head and look at his daughter's tear-streaked face, "Hermione… from what we know, Harry's relied on you and trusted you for years. And you and him. For years you were each other's other half. You were his logical and reasoning side and he was your passionate and impulsive side," he placed his hand gently on her head, "But even with your combined strengths, when something life-changing happens, like the final battle you told us about, it can deeply affect how someone views the world… and how they view their closest friends and family."

"This is not your fault, Hermione" Emma added, trying to help Hermione come to grips with what they were talking about, "Even if you had been aware of it, I don't believe there would have been nothing you could have done to stop it."

Silence fell between them again, but both Emma and Dan knew Hermione's mind wasn't finished.

"He knew he had to die," Hermione said after few moments of silence, "When he came from Dumbledore's office. I saw it in his face. He knew. It's the same look I saw on his face today."

Emma's brow furrowed in confusion. She looked at Dan, who shrugged his shoulders in equal confusion, "What do you mean?" she asked.

Hermione pulled out of her mother's arms and sat back on the ground between them. Her tear-stained face looked between the two confused faces in front of her and explained, "During the last battle, he found out that he was Voldemort's last Horcrux. He saw it in Snape's memories. He saw that he had to die to kill that last part of Voldemort's soul and make him mortal again."

She looked at her father, "He had to die by Voldemort's hand."

She then looked at her mother, "I knew it when I saw his face as he walked down the stairs from Dumbledore's Office. He knew I figured it out too," she started crying again, "I wanted to go with him. To be there when it happened."

Emma's face turned to sadness and she felt a tear run down her cheek at hearing Hermione's story. She looked at her husband who was looking at his daughter with a deep look of sorrow. They had not heard this part of their daughter's life, but it was heart-wrenching to them both to try and understand what Hermione felt like at that moment.

Hermione wiped the tears that were flowing down her cheeks, "He said no. And he gave me a look," she indicated the empty spot across the room, "The same look he gave me today… he knows his end is coming."

The silence was deafening after she spoke. Dan and Emma looked at each other in pained sympathy for their daughter.

Hermione's eyes glazed over as she looked past them, the empty spot, and possibly time itself, "He's going to die," she whispered.

She looked quickly between her parents in the hope they would contradict her, but they both remained silent.

"I'm sorry Princess," her father sighed sadly, "I don't think there's anything you can do if his heart's truly set on it."

Emma scooped her daughter in her arms again and held her, "Oh my girl," she whispered in her ear, "He looks like a man who's lost everything and has nothing to live for."

Hermione's eyes locked on the empty doorway and whispered, "But he still has me."


	5. Chapter 5 - Sleepless in London

Sleepless in London

Hermione lay awake in her bed. She was unable to sleep. Her mind was racing. She kept going over and over the incident at her old house. The image of Harry standing there, barely twenty or so feet from her and she couldn't move or speak. How could she have been so struck dumb as to not be able to say anything to her best friend? She had faced far worse things that should have rendered her to that state; the battle with Nagini at Godric's Hollow, any encounter with Voldemort, and of course the nightmare that was Bellatrix Lestrange to name just a few examples. Yet in all those cases, she was always able to act. But seeing Harry again… rendered her worse than a helpless baby.

She sighed heavily and rolled over on her back in her bed. She covered her eyes under her arm across her face to try and shield out any residual light that was in her room. She could hear the soft ticking of the clock in her room, counting out the seconds that she was not sleeping. With a huff of resignation, she sat up and looked at the clock. It read 10:31 PM. Knowing that sleep was not soon coming, she flung the covers back, dressed and walked down the stairs. She decided that she needed to walk. Maybe that'll help.

After reassuring Kreacher and Winky she was fine and would be back soon, she stepped out the front door of Number 12. She stood on the front step and let the cool night air caress her face and she breathed in the London air. She put her hands in her coat pockets and slowly started her walk. She didn't have direction in mind and let her feet decide. She was aware that there were several people out walking, jogging, and returning from shopping. For a few moments, she envied their simpler muggle lives, wishing she could have that again. But soon her mind returned to the events two nights ago.

Her brow furrowed as she tried to remember every detail. Every nuance of the encounter. But she always returned to the fact her best friend was still alive, but not well.

She turned a corner and found herself standing at the entrance to the nearby park. Deciding that the park was an excellent place to walk and reflect, she entered the gate and continued her walk. The park was quiet at this time of night, but there were others in the park. Usually, the late-night joggers or couples returning from their romantic dinners and wanting to enjoy London at night with a slow romantic walk to where ever they were headed. There were some dangers of course, but she was prepared. Ever since the wars she never left her home without her wand. She felt the comforting sensation of it on her wrist holster and so she was not very concerned.

However, what concerned her was what to do about Harry. She felt like she needed to do something but didn't know what she should do. Her mind hadn't stopped working on what was possible, which frustratingly resulted in nothing every time. 'Come on!', she thought to herself, "You can think of something! You've always been the one to think of something!'

But her mind frustratingly refused to cooperate with her will. She gave a small growl of frustration and sat down on a bench overlooking a pond and a view of the city. She fiddled with her wand in her pockets as she listened to the busy sounds from the city. Cars honking, alarms, airplanes flying, among other sounds was what she listened too. Far cry from Hogwarts where the noisiest thing was birds chirping from the Forbidden Forest.

She scrunched up her face in confusion as to why she was suddenly thinking about Hogwarts. Probably because seeing Harry awoke those old memories. She sat up straighter in a sudden thought. Would he go there? If anyone knew how to hide in that castle it would be Harry. She slumped back, no he wouldn't go back there. McGonagall would have found him hiding at some point.

She tried to think where he could be. Every place she thought of she dismissed as 14 years was a long time to hide in any one place she could think of without someone noticing a scruffy homeless looking man. She gasped at the thought of how thin and ragged he looked. He looked so weak and frail compared to the strong and muscular young man she had seen just before he entered his dorm room.

Her mind then started drifting to the other men she had been with. She knew none of them were bad men, quite the opposite in fact. Had Harry not been in her life, she probably would have been happy being with any of them. But that was the problem she knew… Harry was in her life. Even now 14 later and missing, he was still there. Ever present in her thoughts. She felt horrible for how that had affected her relationships, but until Ginny's recital of her failed love life at the party, she never accepted that Harry was really the reason she never settled down. In the back of her mind, she always wished he would return and they could be together.

She leaned her head back against the top of the bench and slumped in her seat. Staring at the stars she wondered at that moment of he might be looking up and seeing the same stars as her. She silently wished that he was safe and that he would come home soon. She missed him. And now that she had seen him again, she missed him even more so. A large part of herself seemed to have a huge gap in it where he had been and for those few minutes at her old house, that gap had been filled.

Resigning herself that there was nothing else she could do, she decided that she should get home again. She stood from the bench and stretched. She looked at her watch and discovered, to her surprise, that she had been sitting in the park for almost two hours. Realizing that she needed to get home she turned to leave the park. Halfway to the gate she had entered, she suddenly stopped in her tracks. She couldn't explain it, but she suddenly had a sinking suspicion that she was being watched. She turned around and slowly looked around d the dark park. There was nothing or no one there. She listened and only heard the low hooting of an owl in the distance along and nothing else. Thinking she must be going mad, or it was the lack of sleep more likely, she decided it must have been the irrational sense of unfounded paranoia. She gave one last quick glance, before turning and walking out the gate.

As she turned right to return home, she missed the figure standing behind a tree, cloaked in darkness, melt back into the shadows.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hermione shuffled some papers on her desk again, absentmindedly looking for a specific letter regarding taxes on the import of Russian Dragon Nails, but not seeing that it was right on top. Her mind was still in her parent's house replaying the encounter with Harry. She was still shaken and confused days later and people were starting to notice. Hence, she didn't see the paper she had been looking for the last couple of minutes.

She had always prided herself on trying to be prepared for anything but seeing Harry like that after 14 years had truly unnerved her in ways she never thought possible. After all the battles, arguments, and trials she had been a part of since meeting Harry, this had been different. She still felt like she was in a daze and was waiting to snap out of it.

It had been several hours before her parents felt safe to leave her alone after they got her back to her flat. Her mother for sure had been a wreck from seeing Hermione come apart like that. Her father was equally unnerved at the experience but kept a strong front for Hermione to see and draw strength from. Both understood completely what Harry meant to Hermione and how seeing Harry like that had affected their daughter.

Hermione closed her eyes, and the memory flooded back. She could not understand or grasp how… wild… yes, wild Harry looked. Even as tough as it was when they were on the run from Voldemort, Harry never came anywhere close to what he was when he stepped into the ruined house. The unkempt hair and beard. The worn, dirty and ripped clothes. The wild and haunted look in his eyes.

Yes, it had been the eyes and what she saw in them that affected her to her core. She had seen the anger in Harry's eyes. She had seen fear and sorrow in them. But never had she seen his eyes full of pain and anguish. This was something she never expected to see and it unhinged her.

Then there was the final look just before he left the house. The look she had seen as she had watched him walk down the castle steps on his way to the Forbidden Forest to face Voldemort during the final battle at Hogwarts. The look of a man who knew he was going to die and just wanted it to be over. If the look of pain and anguish had unhinged her, that last look turned her stomach to cold ice water in fear.

She was interrupted by a soft knock at her door. She shook herself away from her thoughts to see who it was. She saw The Minister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt, enter. He was holding several pieces of parchment and looking at them with a curious expression on his face.

"Miss Granger," he began with an equally confused tone in his voice, "I don't understand why you have given me your shopping list as well as a report on the office budget for year," he looked at her and with humor thick in his voice he asked, "Was this a subtle hint that you want this office to pay for your shopping or that you needed a raise?"

At her posture and expression, all mirth left his expression. He had never seen her anywhere near how he saw her right now since… before the final battle 14 years ago. He put down the parchment on her desk and looked at her with concern.

"Hermione? Is everything alright?" Kingsley asked.

Hermione put the paper down on the desk and buried her face in her hands. She softly groaned, "No,' she pulled herself together and looked at him, "I saw Harry."

There was a moment of tense silence before Kingsley gasped in surprised, "Harry? As in Harry Potter? Are you sure Hermione?"

Hermione nodded. She rubbed her eyes, "Yes Minister. He showed up at my parent's house when we went to see it before they sold it," she fixed her gaze on him, "I didn't recognize him at first."

Kingsley's face still showed the shock of hearing that Harry was still alive when he asked, "Was he okay?"

Hermione's face turned to tired sorrow and she shook her head, "No," she fidgeted with her hands for a moment, "He…," her voice broke and she took a shuttering breath trying to compose herself, "He's changed. He looked like a homeless man. But he's even more run down and beaten emotionally, but with a look of deep anguish and pain."

Kingsley digested her description in his mind. That was deeply unsettling to him. The Harry he remembered was kind, compassionate and brave. Now for Harry to be described as a beaten man, rundown, and in pain was not the young man that had come to save the world. The young man that Kingsley had been, and still was, willing to give his life for.

Hermione spent a few moments telling him what happened. His unsettledness grew with every word she spoke. Indeed, a deep sense of foreboding was gathering in the pit of his stomach. And after she finished with Harry leaving the house, Kingsley needed to sit down.

He looked at Hermione's face, seeing her tears run down her cheeks as she tried to maintain her composure. With a wave of his wand, her door closed, allowing them some privacy. He conjured a chair next to Hermione's and sat down heavily. His mind was also racing with what he could do. Start the search up again? He mentally shook his head. That would be fruitless. He knew Harry. There would be no trace left or evidence as to where he went. What if he went to the Granger's house? After all, he might see something his Aurors wouldn't. But again, he dismissed the notion for the same reason.

"Who else knows?" he finally asked.

"Just you," she whispered and wiped away her tears.

He looked upon her for a few moments more before saying, "You need to tell the others."

Her reaction of glowering at him told him she was not enthusiastic with that idea, "I'm not sure how I can do that and tell them that he got away and I didn't stop him," she said, her voice matching her look at him. She had kept the part of her breakdown after Harry left to herself, so he didn't know that she never even tried.

"I easily believe and understand that you don't know how to say it," he leaned forward and put some urgency in his voice, "But Hermione they should know. They need to know."

They looked at each other for a few long seconds. He watched her think and work out how she might be able to not tell anyone else. He watched as she fidgeted agitatedly while she thought. Ultimately, he knew that she would figure out that he was right and that there was no other way around this. He also knew that if she didn't tell them and it was later revealed that she had known, the fallout would be a shift and not pleasant.

A terse nod, with a blink of a tear escaping, was her reply. He gave her a warm, sympathetic smile before standing, "Go home. Get some rest and don't worry about coming back this week. Take some time, you have plenty to take, and when you're ready… call everyone together and tell them. But don't wait too long."

She looked at him silently with both a look of betrayal and fear. She knew in the logical part of her brain she needed to do it, but she wasn't ready. She had not wanted him to tell her that or even force her hand, but she felt as if she was being forced into it sooner than she had wanted. The fact he had told her to go home and not come back for a while didn't help her disposition either.

Another terse nod was her reply.

He nodded, made the chair he sat on disappeared and grabbed the parchment he had set down. He started for the door when he stopped and placed her shopping list on her desk. He gave her a smile with more humor in it.

"Your raise has been approved," he said hoping to lighten the mood and left the room.


	6. Chapter 6 - The Plan

The Plan

"Harry's back?!" Ron burst out in utter disbelief and shock.

It was several days after Hermione had seen the man who was her best friend before she was able to find the courage and strength to gather everyone together. Her parents came with her as a source of strength, which she was grateful for because she wasn't sure she could get through this without their support. Now everyone was sitting in the living room of The Burrow staring in various versions of shock and dismay at her pronouncement.

"He was, Ronald," she replied, with a little edge in her voice she always used when she was trying to get him to catch-up with the conversation, "However, I don't know if he's still here."

Ron looked between Ginny, Luna, Neville and then back to Hermione, "What do you mean you don't know if he's still here? You didn't go after him?"

She took a calming breath before replying, "He apparated immediately after he walked out the door. There was no way to stop him."

"Ummm… you could cast an anti-apparition ward when you recognized him," Ginny's matter-of-fact voice sounded.

Hermione nervously bit her lower lip before quietly saying, "I was distracted."

Seeing his daughter's discomfort growing, and not wanting to delve into why Hermione was distracted and what happened afterward, Dan Granger decided to step in, "I think the important point is that Harry's alive and, at least for a short time, was back in England."

"But why didn't come here?" Ginny looked at her parents in dismay, "The Burrow was practically his home."

"The Harry we saw was not the Harry we remember," Hermione's voice caught in her throat. Her emotions of that day were still raw.

Emma stepped in seeing Hermione's discomfort, "Hermione's right. The man we saw was not the Harry everyone remembers. He was embittered. Haunted and in pain. He kept claiming he was the cause of all of the problems. He was in a deep belief of this."

"What problems?" Mrs. Weasley asked, her face twisted in confusion.

Hermione took a deep breath before answering, "I'm guessing everything that happened because of Voldemort wanting to kill him. I think, and this just my guess, that Harry blames himself for everyone who died or was injured because of their prophesized battle."

"But that's a load of bollocks!" George burst out in astonishment at Hermione's comment, "Harry isn't to blame for everything that's happened. He's no more responsible for Fred's death than I am for weather changes in Ireland."

"George's right," Neville leaned forward in his chair, "Voldemort and his Death Eaters are largely to blame for what happened. And the Ministry under Fudge would take the rest of the blame. How would he even think otherwise?"

"It's not uncommon for people to have these feelings, Ron," Bill Weasley spoke in an even tone from behind a seated Fleur, "Especially if the event was seriously traumatic. People, like Harry, who are sensitive to those around them don't necessarily process those thoughts logically and objectively."

"Bill's right," Hermione held up her hand and they stopped talking.

"Everyone here knows that Harry has always… always been sensitive to why he was labeled "The Boy Who Lived" and the fact he was never really comfortable with everyone fighting for him," she said, "I knew this when we first met twenty-something years ago. And if this is truly the reason why he disappeared 14 years ago, when we finally have a good idea what happened after the battle was over and why he left."

"But… but he's gone," Ron said, pointing out the obvious yet again, "How can we help him see what a git he's being if we can't find him again?"

"I can help with that," Mr. Weasley shifted in his seat, "As some, you may remember when he went missing and we have set up tracer wards around London, Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and a few other locations Harry may visit. If anyone apparates into any of the locations, Aurors will be notified and will arrive to investigate."

Ginny snorted, "Oh please Dad. Like that's going to help," she rubbed her face in frustration at her father's questioning look at her retort, "Come on, Harry against an auror or an army of Aurors? I hope you're ready to lose them because if Harry is this upset he will not let himself be taken. Assuming he doesn't see them coming and disappear again."

Mr. Weasley opened his mouth to reply but closed it again. His daughter was right. The plans he and the Minster had carefully put in place years ago could and will royally backfire if Harry's emotional and mental state was as bad as Hermione and her parents described. Even if Harry didn't attack them first, the inevitable battle that would happen would be devastating to everything around them. Innocent people could be injured or die while they were busy trying to stop Harry. He was in just an impossible position now as he would have been all those years ago.

"Wait," Percy's face was scrunched up in confusion and looked at his father, "Why didn't the wards get tripped when he apparated in and out from Hermione's home?"

Mr. Wealsey's face twitched in vexation. Not at his son's question, just because of the answer, "Hermione's house is outside the boundaries we established," he grudgingly admitted, "We didn't think he'd go there as it had been destroyed and was unlivable. I will make sure it's included from this point forward though."

"But then why weren't the wards triggered anywhere else?" Bill asked, confused, "Wouldn't he have apparated in at any of those locations at some point in last 14 years?"

"It would be easy for him to apparate just outside the wards and walk through them," Charlie Weasley spoke standing next to Bill, "Harry's a smart man. He'd have figured on the wards."

"I think all agree, Charlie, that Harry would use his knowledge of us to his advantage to remain out of sight. Harry could be coming or going at will and we'd still not know it," Mr. Weasley said, "The wards were to track Harry apparating, not walking into those places. Assuming that he's even gone anywhere near those places, "he paused before tapping a finger on the table top, "But the real question is what we do when we do find him again?"

"Can we set the wards to sense Harry?" Ginny asked.

Hermione shook her head no as Mr. Weasley replied, "I'm sorry. Magical wards are not able to do that. Otherwise, we'd have to know where Peter Pettigrew and other Death Eaters were years ago.

"What about if we were the ones that were notified if the wards are tripped?" Neville asked, looking around the table, "If it should be anyone he sees, it should be us first."

Ginny gave her husband's hand a squeeze and smiled at him, "I think that's a great idea. A friendly face would be better."

"I'll make the arrangements immediately," Mr. Weasley said without hesitation. Neville's idea was spot on and it saved his Aurors from any potential disasters they weren't ready for. The others murmured their agreement to Neville's idea before they were silenced by a dreamy voice from next to Ron.

"I think Hermione should be the first person contacted."

All eyes snapped to Luna, who looked around as if surprised they didn't think of it, "What? She's the only person he implicitly trusts more than any of us. He would react to her better than any of us."

Everyone was silent for a moment before Ginny said, "That's a great idea," she confirmed and looked back at Hermione.

Hermione's only reaction was an expression of deep concern.

"Hermione dear. What's the matter?" Mrs. Weasley asked when she saw her face.

Seeing his daughter's contrite expression Dan broke in, "Ummm… he didn't react to her very well when he saw her a couple of days ago," he said from next to Mrs. Weasley, "Someone else may want to take the first crack at him."

Emma saw the confused looks around the room and felt she needed to elaborate a bit more, "Actually, he didn't react to her at all other to say it was his fault for saving her in their first year from the troll," she said, "That was as close to interacting with her as he got."

"Didn't you try and talk with him, Hermione?" Mrs. Weasley asked, confused as to Hermione's silence in this.

Hermione lowered her eyes and shook her head, "I was too shocked to speak. I didn't know what to say or do when I saw him and how he looked."

The room fell silent as they all went into deep thought. Collectively they all agreed that no one blamed Hermione for her reaction. They all felt they might have reacted the same way in her position.

"I still think Hermione's the best choice," Luna said, not letting go of the topic, "She has fewer Nargles that would interfere in her efforts."

Ron snorted and rolled his eyes at his wife's suggestion. There were a few smiles at the Nargles comment from everyone else. But it was Luna's next comment that cemented the notion in their minds.

"Plus she loves him."

There were quite a few smiles around the room as they looked at Hermione. Hermione's face blanched at Luna's public announcement and she flashed a worried look at her mother. Emma gave her a small smile and shrug of her shoulders.

"We all know, Sweetheart," she said with a smile to her daughter, "We've known for years. You can read it in your letters to us."

"Hermione," Mr. Weasley pipped in, he was calm, but intent, "Aside from that happy thought, I know that there is no one more suited to this than you. You know Harry. You know how to reach him."

"Arthur, you're right, I know Harry," Hermione looked around the room at everyone and held up her hands, "And I'm not saying I don't want to do this, I really do, but you have to understand I don't know the man I saw a couple of days ago. He's a total stranger to me."

"Regardless Hermione dear," Mrs. Weasley looked at her with an almost imploring look, "I think everyone here knows and believes that the Harry we knew is still inside him somewhere. Who else but his best friend and the person who loves him deeply to help reach him?"

Hermione heard the murmurs of agreements from everyone. She looked at her mother and father and they both gave her a smile, nod of confidence and from her father a wink.

"Alright," she agreed feeling nervous. She looked at Mr. Weasley, "What do I need to do?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hermione felt physically and emotionally drained after the meeting with everyone about Harry. She dropped her bag on the floor with a loud THUNK! and practically fell backward into the couch. The meeting with everyone had gone almost as she had thought, with the exception of Luna blurting out Hermione's deepest feeling towards Harry. Granted Ginny's "I knew it! That's why the others never worked out!" help lighten the mood and relieve the weight on her mind about trying to keep that secret, it didn't help with what was to come.

To the point, while it was all well in good to talk about what she had to do if Harry returned and she got to him first, now the issue was she had to do it. The enormity of what was decided and what she had agreed to only was starting to register with her and she was seriously lacking any confidence in her being able to handle it. It was almost as if she were faced with saving Harry's life again, but this time his and her souls as well. The pressure of that was almost overwhelming.

Her mother carefully placed her bag on the side table and smiled grimly at her daughter. Dan mumbled something about going to the kitchen and make some tea. She nodded absentmindedly to him as she picked up Hermione's bag and set it on the table next to hers. She looked at Hermione stared blankly at the far wall more than likely in deep thought.

"Penny for your thoughts?" she asked quietly as she approached and sat in the armchair next to the couch.

She watched as her daughter's face flashed with confusion, worry, and something else she could immediately recognize. It was a few moments before Hermione looked at her mother and her voice quietly replied.

"I don't know if I can do this."

Emma thought it wise not to reply. She knew her daughter. And she knew Hermione was thinking through every eventuality, every consequence, and every outcome in her brilliant brain. Emma knew better than to interrupt that flow of brain power. Her decision to remain quiet was rewarded a few moments later when Hermione's eyes flashed back to hers. It surprised her that Hermione's eye was haunted and in pain. A mirror almost to Harry's eyes a few days before, but not nearly to that intensity.

"What if I fail?" she looked away and her eyes focused on a faraway place, "What if he doesn't respond to me."

Emma knew with that statement that now Hermione's soul had entered the fray going on in her mind.

"My daughter," she paused and set herself to tell her some not so welcome advice, "You may indeed fail. Harry may indeed not respond to you the way you hope," she held up her hands at Hermione when Hermione's eyes flashed in a look of betrayal, "That's the reality of this and you know this already. I'm not telling you something you don't already know."

The flash in Hermione's eyes faded a bit and Emma pressed onwards, "But none of us knows what's to come… if it ever comes," she looked at Hermione and said insistently, "You're presuming that he will be found again."

Hermione's head dropped back against the couch and she groaned, "I never thought about that," she whispered.

Emma shrugged, "Oh you have I'm sure, but your mind didn't register that as a real possibility yet."

Dan entered with the tea and placed in on the coffee table between them. He handed a cup to his wife and then to his daughter, "Princess… tea. This will help."

Hermione slowly and almost reluctantly sat up and took the cup from her father, "Thank you."

Dan sat down and sipped his. He put the cup in the saucer, regarded his daughter and pursed his lips before asking, "Is it really that you believe that you'll fail or that he won't love you?"

Emma flashed her husband an angry look. She immediately considered him to be the dumbest man on the planet for asking their daughter that in her raw and vulnerable state. She opened her mouth to admonish him when Hermione's almost barely perceptible "Yes" drained her anger at him away.

Hermione placed her cup down and looked at the still moving liquid and nodded glumly, "Yes," she replied again but this time louder, "I'm afraid of that most of all."

She looked between her two parents, her lower lip trembling, "I can't bear to think that if I do find him again and I do tell him and he runs away that I won't recover from that," she played with the hem of her skirt, "It'll almost be like he's…," she trailed off.

"Rejecting you?" her mother finished.

Hermione nodded, still playing with her skirt hem and a tear fell from her eyes. She took a deep ragged breath, "Yes, rejection."

She forced herself to stop playing with her skirt and gripped it tightly instead, "It's taken years for me to finally come to grips with two facts; I love Harry and that he was gone," she wiped her eyes, "Now he's come back, abet briefly and both facts have been crushed together and I stand on the very edge of the precipice where both could be ripped apart and I'd fall into the abyss."

Dan flashed a quick look at his wife before setting his cup down, "Princess, I do not for one moment believe that it's as bleak a situation as you believe," he added emphasis to his next words, "You have to have faith in him and yourself. Don't get mired in the negative. Think positively. Believe in yourself and believe that the Harry you knew is still in him. Maybe buried deep down, but it's still there and you more than the other seven billion people in this world know how to reach him deep down."

Emma gave him a proud smile at his words. She now understood why he asked what at the time seemed like an insensitive question. He went to the heart of the matter quickly and efficiently as he always had in any other situation. He knew to try and curb Hermione's self-torture over this, which was always an issue with their daughter's confidence. And the longer than was drawn out the worse Hermione would have felt and become more despondent.

"My sweet daughter," she sat forward and placed a hand on Hermione's hands and felt them trembling, "Your father's right. Have faith. Believe… you must believe."

Hermione nodded and looked over and out the glass bay window into the backyard. Emma and Dan sat quietly as they watched Hermione wrestle with the near Herculean effort that was to come… if it came. They were nearly lost in their own thoughts that they almost missed Hermione's barely whispered words.

"I must believe."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A week after her talk with Kingsley and then the others, Hermione was hard at work behind her desk trying to figure out a solution with the visiting delegation from Bulgaria. Apparently, one of the visiting delegates decided to go and have a night out in muggle London. The results of that disastrous decision were many hundreds of pounds worth of damage to a bar, several injured muggles, and one seriously hungover wizard. While the damage had been magically repaired, the injuries healed, and every muggle's mind obliviated, there still left Hermione with the task of dealing with the hungover delegate.

She finished drafting the report of the incident to the Minister and her recommendation to fine the delegation 100 galleons for the trouble caused and recompense the Ministry for cleaning up after the delegate. She signed the draft, stood and walked to the outer office where Matilda sat.

Hermione stopped and stood next to Matilda, who was busy reading the afternoon messages and started placing various notes, messages, and her report in the appropriate bins on Matilda's desk. At the first placement of parchment in the bins, Matilda stopped reading and watched her friend sort everything… correctly of course. She couldn't abide her filing system being abused with inefficiency like missorting. She then looked up and saw her friend's bloodshot eyes and tired face.

"Late night?" she asked with a hint of mischief in her voice.

Hermione looked down and saw the impish grin and wink and snorted, "Late night yes, but not for the reasons you think," she sighed.

Matilda harrumphed, "It would have surprised me if you had had a late night for the reason I was thinking."

Hermione gave her a look of mock huffiness, "I date," she retorted.

Matilda rolled her eyes and gave a hoot of laughter, "Ohhhh please, what you think is dating is not dating."

Hermione opened her mouth and Matilda cut her off with a stern look and pointed a finger, "And none of those gits you were with for years count either. Idiots each of them. Even the last one whom I bet still wishes he'd not asked you to marry him."

Hermione closed her mouth and shook her head in disagreement, "In your opinion," she muttered.

"Yes," Matilda said, "And it's my expert opinion too."

Hermione again shook her head. She closed her eyes for a brief moment. She had not told her friend that she had stopped trying to date people now that she was focused on Harry and her feelings for him. To Hermione, it seemed wrong to want to see others and she didn't want to try and explain it to people. So for now, she was content to let them conclude that her dating life was an utter failure.

Matilda regarded her friend for a moment and then quickly stood, grabbing her purse, "Coffee."

Hermione's eyes snapped open, "What?"

"Coffee," Matilda said again looking Hermione, "Dark liquid substance full of caffeine that you drink to stay awake."

Hermione glowered at her friend, "I know what coffee is."

Matilda never responded to the glower, "Good. Let's go. It's on me."

"I can't," Hermione said, "I'm really busy with…"

Matilda ignored her friend and shouted out, "Headed to the café Minister for coffee. Would you like any?"

"No, thank you, Matilda," came the deeply voiced reply.

"Taking Hermione with me," Matilda said looking right at her friend.

"Please do," came the deep voice again.

Matilda nodded once and pointed to the door. Hermione rolled her eyes in mock exasperation but gave her a small smile a moment later. The two quickly made their way to the café, and after grabbing their drinks, sat at a small table near the atrium to talk and watch passersby. It was their favorite table and they often enjoyed lunch or their tea breaks here. Hermione noted it was a little busier than usual today, but she didn't mind too much.

After sitting for a moment, Matilda added milk and sugar (a lot of sugar to "keep her sweet"), stir and then take a sip before setting her cup down and looking pointedly at her friend, "So what's gotten you all flustered? And I know it's not sex."

Hermione nearly choked on her first sip at her friend's comment. She quickly put her cup down and wiped her mouth, "Excuse me?"

Matilda waved away any indignation on Hermione's part, "Oh please. I can easily see that there's something which has seriously upset your life and since I know you're not seeing anyone," she put her elbows on the table, folded her hands and placed her chin on them, then giving Hermione a sweet and innocent expression asked, "So what happened?"

Hermione placed her napkin on her lap and smoothed it out unnecessarily. She knew it would be in vain to try and get out of telling her friend anything. Matilda was very good at extracting information from people. Ron once jokingly referred to her as an Unspeakable because of that innate ability, to which Matilda just raised an eyebrow and didn't refute his claim.

Hermione sighed heavily and fidgeted with her spoon, "I saw Harry at my house a few weeks ago."

Matilda's hands dropped to the table loudly with a thump, "What?!"

Several people stopped their conversations and looked at the two friends with a mixture of confusion and annoyance at the noise. Hermione glanced furtively around, noticing they now had people looking at them.

Hermione leaned forward in her seat over the table with an infuriated look on her face, "Will you be a little quieter please?" Hermione said in a hiss.

Matilda, who was oblivious to her surroundings, looked at Hermione in shock, "You saw Harry? As in the Harry Potter?"

Hermione glanced around to see if anyone was listening and just nodded. She sat back and thankfully saw people had returned to their conversations and were ignoring them.

"That Harry Potter, yes," she replied in a quiet hiss.

Matilda's eyes widened, "Oh Merlin!" she gasped, "What happened?"

Hermione spent several minutes telling her about the meeting and stopped just after Harry left. Matilda sat back assimilating what Hermione had just told her. She looked at the younger woman in front of her and saw a haunted look in her eyes that had not been there before.

She leaned forward, "That's not all that happened that day was it?" she asked in a matter of fact tone.

Hermione slightly grimaced at the memory and shook her head. Matilda leaned forward and quietly asked, "What else happened Hermione?"

Hermione took a deep breath, "He never acknowledged me."

Matilda looked incredulously at Hermione, "What?"

Hermione nodded, "He never looked at me or even said hello," she paused, "It was like I wasn't even there."

"Blimey," Matilda whispered, "Poor Hermione, that's so cold."

Hermione shrugged, trying to make it seem less than what it was, "It's okay."

"That's utter rot," Matilda snapped, "I know you. I know how much you've talked about him for all these years, so I know how much you love him and care about him," she leaned forward and said earnestly, "And for you to sit there and tell me it's okay tells me what a total prat you are."

Hermione gave her a rude glare, but Matilda didn't back down, "Don't give me that look. For the brightest witch in a century, you're a complete tosser if you think that I, or anyone for that matter, would think that it wouldn't matter to you that the most important person you have ever know ignores you."

Hermione stayed silent and she sat in her chair, looking at her cup as she flicked her nail over a small chip in the cup. Matilda was right of course. The fact that Harry had ignored her had hurt her. A lot. But then she didn't exactly do anything to attract his attention.

"I never said anything," Hermione finally said, "I just stood there… completely mute."

Matilda blinked, "You didn't say anything?"

Hermione shook her head.

Matilda looked surprised, "Nothing? Not even a 'Hello' or 'Where the bloody Hell have you been?'"

Again, Hermione shook her head.

Matilda sat back heavily, "So there is someone out there that can render you speechless."

The left side of Hermione's mouth quirked upwards. Matilda again was correct. Harry would be that one and the only person that could and had on more than one occasion, rendered her speechless.

"Boy it does not sound like you came off looking good in this," her friend said.

Hermione nodded, "I feel so… I don't know… utterly stupid!"

"Go with that feeling," came Matilda's quick reply.

"All well and good you can say that sitting here," Hermione's voice filled with anger and hurt, "You weren't there to see the love of your life looking like… like…," she trailed off unable to finish.

Matilda sat and wisely did not say anything more. She could see her friend sitting across from her, full of conflicting emotions coursing through her, and knew that there wasn't anything she could say in comfort. Of course, she had known that Hermione loved Harry and far more than just as her best friend. Not that, until this moment, Hermione had ever admitted it. There had not been a day that went by that Hermione did not mention him or look at the picture on her desk of them taken after Harry's last birthday before the final push of the war started.

Matilda had finally heard Hermione confess her true feelings for the dark-haired man in that picture. And knowing Hermione the way she did, she knew that pointing that out would not be in any way helpful for her friend. Hermione would only clam up and try and deny it. She decided to change the subject.

"Does anyone aside from you and your parents know he's still alive?"

Hermione nodded, "I spoke with everyone a few days ago. They were just as surprised as I was. We've decided to try and be on the lookout for him. Detection wards have been placed all around London, Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, and a few other places we think he might go. But Harry's too smart and too powerful to be tricked by that."

Matilda's eyebrow's furrowed, "Wait. You mean you don't know where he went or where he is?"

Hermione shook her head, "No. I incapable of going after him and we've already searched everywhere we think he would be, but there's been no trace of him."

"What about Gringotts?" Matilda asked, "He has to be getting money to live."

"No," Hermione said, "I'm the trustee of Harry's estate and money per his instructions. Harry's estate manager Agarak confirmed a few days ago with me that only I have ever used any money in Harry's vaults."

"How is that possible for him to live without money for 14 years?"

Hermione shrugged, "I don't know, but Harry's resourceful and smart," she gave her friend a small smile, "Smarter than me in many ways."

Matilda sat back heavily and sipped her coffee. She put the cup in the saucer and looked at Hermione, "So, you're just going to sit there and wait?"

Hermione shrugged, "Nothing else to do."

Matilda opened her mouth to argue that point but closed it quickly. She thought about it for a few moments and agreed that Hermione was right. After 14 years, Harry would have long since learned how to move undetected and unnoticed. And if their search had returned no evidence of him ever being at those places, chances are that Harry was far from people and far from London.

Matilda's eyebrows furrowed again in sudden confusion, "Wait. After 14 years, why did he come back?"

Hermione paused before replying, "He claimed he was making amends for what he did and what happened to everyone because of him."

"Making amends?" Matilda's voice was full of confusion, "Amends for what?"

"For everything that happened after Voldemort died trying to kill him when he was one year old."

"That's complete bollocks!" Matilda exclaimed loudly, again drawing looks from surrounding tables.

"I know," Hermione said sadly, now ignoring the looks from the other tables, "But Harry's always blamed himself for that and no one, not even me, has ever been able to change his view on that."

Matilda sat back, reflecting on what Hermione had just shared with her. She looked across the table at the bushy-haired woman and felt simultaneous emotions of sympathy and anger. Sympathy for the fact that old wounds had been opened and the man she loved had shown up again. Anger because there was nothing anyone could do to tell Harry how much he had hurt Hermione by running away and now showing up again without talking to her.

"So, you wait."

Hermione nodded at the simple statement and looked around the atrium. She let her mind wander as she watched the busy center of the British wizarding community. She envied the witches and wizards going about their lives, not having the crushing weight on her heart that was Harry Potter. In some ways, she had wished he hadn't survived the battle. It would be easier for her to have mourned his death because he would have been gone to never return. Instead, he was in a state of limbo with her. Always there, but never there.

_"Where the bloody Hell are you Harry Potter!"_ she wished she could scream. But she stayed silent and mentally screamed the question.

A small group of younger witches and wizards were walking past laughing and talking excitedly. Hermione just stared past them, but they were talking so loudly that Hermione couldn't help but hear parts of their conversation as they walked past.

"She didn't?!" a wizard said laughing.

The smiling witch next to him nodded, "She did! Right there in the middle of the Forest of Dean! Naked and chanting like it was 300 years ago!"

"She's completely nutters!" another witch exclaimed with a laugh.

Hermione's ears suddenly perked up. She looked at the small group as it passed in shock.

Matilda, who was just finishing a sip of her coffee, saw the immediate change in her friend's demeanor, "Hermione? What's wrong?" she asked cautiously as Hermione watched the group go by.

Hermione stood quickly, her eyes never leaving the group as they walked away from her. She looked down at Matilda, eyes wide and then suddenly rushed from the table and raced for the lifts.


	7. Chapter 7 - The Forest of Dean

The Forest of Dean

Hermione apparated and took a look around. She knew this was the right spot. She turned to the right and saw the spot where their tent had been. The tree she had sat against while Harry recovered from their excursion with Nagini. It all looked unchanged from when they had been here over a decade ago. With a sudden shiver, she wrapped herself with a thought that she was sure her shiver had nothing to do with the wind.

She shook her head to clear the memories and focused on the present. She knew he must be here. She could almost sense him. She finished looking around and saw a dense patch of trees about 30 meters ahead of her. Her eyes narrowed at the spot. It was almost too dense for the forest… almost seemed man-made.

_"There,"_ she thought, _"It's close to where we were, close to water, but still buried deep in the forest so no one would see him."_

She cautiously walked towards the dense forest, ears listening for any sound and her eye constantly moving. Her cloak was catching on the branches as she went deeper and deeper into the forest. As she went through, she paused on several occasions when she thought she heard something. The noises were birds flying away or chipmunks scurrying away as she startled them.

_"I'm getting jumpy,"_ she thought, trying to calm herself in the dense thicket, _"Maybe that's the point. Anti-muggle charms?"_

Finally, she broke through the dense barrier and came into a semi-clearing. She stood in awe at what she was confronted with. She was surrounded by a similar dense wall of foliage, but a bare clearing of trees in the center to allow sunlight in. But aside from a hollowed-out tree that had been felled years ago, the area was empty. She walked around the area and saw something by the fallen tree that caught her attention. She walked over and knelt down. A ring of stones with a charred center where a fire had been lit.

"Smokeless fire," she muttered to herself. She reached out and touched the remaining ash and unburnt wood and it was cold to the touch, "Dowsed hours ago."

She turned her head and looked at the fallen tree and gasped. She saw that it had been hollowed out by hand, big enough for a person to fit in. She moved to kneel in front of the opening. She saw a bed of leaves and soft mosses that appeared to be used as a mattress.

"Oh Harry," she said softly, her voice breaking in sorrow.

She looked up and around to see if she could see any other indication that he was here. Nothing. If it weren't for these two pieces of evidence, no one would ever suspect someone lived here.

She stood and brushed the dirt from her hands on her skirt. She wasn't sure what to do at this point, but wait. So that's what she did. She sat on the tree and waited. After a few hours, she was beginning to wonder how long she would have to wait or if she should come back later when a soft crack to her right turned her head quickly. She hopped off the tree and turned to face the now approaching sounds of footsteps. A few moments later she inhaled silently at the sight.

Harry Potter, looking the same as she had seen him a few months ago at her parent's house, except more tired and gaunt. Food obviously wasn't a daily occurrence she assumed, seeing how loosely his clothes hug from him. He was carrying an armload of wood and was oblivious that she was there.

She bit her lower lip nervously before calling out, "Hi Harry."

He stopped short and looked up at the sound of the voice and his eyes went wide in shock. His eyes immediately flicked around.

Hermione immediately knew what he was doing, "No wait! Harry! It's me! I'm alone," she saw him take a step backward, "No! Please!"

She took a step forward and knew that was the wrong move. He dropped his armful of wood and in the same fluid motion brought his wand up and pointed it at her. She raised her hands immediately and stopped in her tracks. She slowly lowered her hood to reveal her face to him. His eyes widened at the sight of her in front of him.

"Hold it!" she said, raising her hands to show she wasn't holding her wand and tried to give him a reassuring smile, "I'm not here to hurt you, Harry."

He was still looking around, breathing quickly in panic, not trusting her that she was telling him the truth that she was alone. He took another step back. His wand was still pointed at her, but now was quivering.

"Harry," she said again softly. He turned back to her, "Harry, please. What happened?"

He didn't answer.

"Harry. Why did you leave?" she asked, her voice almost imploring, "Please talk to me."

"You don't understand," he whispered hoarsely, "I had to go."

"But why?"

"No more," he whispered and shook his head, "No more. I can't."

"You can't what, Harry?" she asked, trying to keep her voice soft and comforting.

"No more," he said again and took another step back.

She decided she needed to do something. She took a slow step forward but immediately stopped when his wand stopped quivering and was held rock steady at her heart.

"Harry, I'm here to help," she said and slowly put her arms down, "Please. Let me help. Whatever it is, we can work through it. Everyone is worried about you."

Still, with a look of panic, he shook his head, "No more. It needs to end."

"No more what Harry? Do you think everything was your fault?" she saw his eyes flash and knew she hit a cord, "Harry… none of what happened was your fault."

"Yes, it was!" he shouted at her. His voice was filled with pain and anger, "All of it! My fault!"

"Why do you say that Harry?" she asked.

"Because," he paused and closed his eyes and looked like he was fighting some internal battle, "Because I was the reason! All of it Hermione! I was the reason Voldemort came after me! He killed my parents because of me! He killed…" his voice broke, "He killed them all. And all because of me!"

She stood in silence for a few moments before she shook her head, "No Harry. It's not your fault. It was Voldemort who did those things…"

"Weren't you just listening!" he screamed at her with rage, "I was why he acted the way he did! I was why he did everything! If I wasn't around he wouldn't have destroyed half the wizarding world and I… and I wouldn't have helped him destroy what was left by trying to save the other half."

Hermione stood looking at him, unable to think of a defense. She saw the conviction of the broken man that stood before her. At that moment she knew that when he went into his old dorm room in Hogwarts he must have had 17 years of memories suddenly flood his mind. He blamed himself.

"Harry," she spoke again in a quiet tone, "Harry, even if half of what you say is true…"

"It's all true!" he spat at her.

She took a calming breath before resuming, "Even if half of it were true, you can't blame yourself for everyone's actions."

He looked at her like she was the dumbest person he'd ever met, "Oh really?" he stabbed his wand at her while he spoke, "And who's fault was it Sirius was killed? Huh, Hermione? Who? You going to blame Voldemort for that too? He tricked me, Hermione! And if I had really been as smart as I thought I was I would have listened to you and not gone to the Ministry that day. Sirius would still be alive!"

"You don't know that for sure Harry," she said before kicking herself at her comment. That was the wrong thing to say and she knew it immediately.

"Neither do you! You don't understand!" he spat, "And you never will."

"You're right Harry. I don't understand," she smiled at him sadly, "But I'm trying too. Please… please help me to understand."

He shook his head and took another step back, "No. No more. It has to end."

His wand stopped shaking in his hand and he seemed to become calm in front of her. She shifted where she stood, not liking the sudden change in his demeanor.

"I'm the last piece," he whispered looking at her like she was suddenly the answer, "You…"

Her blood turned cold. There it was. The look. The look she had seen as he walked to his death in the Forbidden Forest. She knew immediately that this was the end.

"Harry. Don't…" was all she got out before a bright flash shot towards her.

Instinctively she dived to the hard ground and the spell passed barely a foot above her head. She quickly looked up and leaped forward, narrowly missing another spell that exploded the ground where she just was, leaving a small smoking crater. She quickly rolled and dived behind the tree where he slept. Two spells hit the tree in rapid succession, sending splinters and dirt over her. She took out her wand, unable to believe what was happening.

"Harry! Stop!" she shouted, "I'm not here to fight you! I'm here to help you!"

Another flurry of spells impacted against the tree sending more debris everywhere. She took a quick peek over the tree and her eyes widened at the sight. Harry just stood there in the open, waiting for her.

"Harry! Why?!"

"It has to end Hermione!" came his response, "You should have left me alone!"

"Why Harry! Tell me why!" she shouted and ducked as a spell just missed her head.

"I just wanted to be left at peace!" he shouted, "But I know it's never going to be possible while I live. Then you found me, then…," he trailed off.

"Harry? What are you talking about?"

"Everyone will be happier if I'm not around to cause more pain."

Hermione shook her head, "Oh Harry. That's not true."

A quick succession of spells forced her to lie flat on the forest floor. She realized to her horror that Harry wasn't holding back with his spells.

"I'm not here to fight you!" she shouted. Hermione was still in a state of shock at why Harry saw her as a threat. Her best friend.

"Harry stop! I'm not your enemy! I'm your best friend!" she tried again.

"No! Not anymore!" he shouted, his voice full of anger and emotion, "I can't have any friends. Too much suffering… it's too much… for them."

She scrambled to sit with her back against the tree trunk, "You prat! I am your best friend!" she shouted in anger at his response, "I chose that years ago! Willingly!"

She quick fired a stunning spell at him, but he easily dodged it, "Good!" he shouted at her using magic on him, "But you need to do better to end this!"

"But why do you want to fight me?"

"I need you to…," he started and paused, "… to help me not feel the pain anymore. I figured it out and I've waited many years. And now you here and...," he trailed off.

Her eyes went wide in shock and disbelief at his comment. She had been right. He wanted to die. But why now… wait..., _"What the Hell? No… no bloody way. He must think I'm his Angel of Death,"_ her mind decided with an epiphany as powerful as an explosion. Her blood went cold at the idea that Harry wanted her to defeat him. "No, not defeat him. To end his life. No, not Harry," she thought again, _"Harry would never have asked her to do that before, but what other explanation could there be?"_ Either way, she was not going to agree to his plan.

She shook her head, "No Harry! I won't do it!" she shouted back at him her voice ringing with anger, "I'm not going to let you go!"

"You have to!" another spell hit, this time blowing a hole the size of her head six inches from where she had taken cover.

Her mind knew at that moment that she was down to only a couple of options and each was not a good outcome. She needed to get away from him and get help. She rolled her eyes. What help? Even if she got away he'd escape and she would never find him ever again. And if she brought help in, people might get hurt or killed. She knew she needed to stop him. _"He's too powerful,"_ she thought, _"But he keeps trying to hurt me or kill me, then he's not giving me any choice. I'm going to have to kill him or be killed."_ She shook her head… no, she must stop him… not kill him.

But she couldn't stay in this contained area, she needed more room. She concentrated and tried to apparate and growled in frustrated anger as she couldn't. _"Of course,"_ she mentally kicked herself, _"Harry had anti-apparition charms!" _She should have been smart enough to scan for them earlier. She looked quickly for a way out and saw it. The way she came in. She removed her cloak and with quickness, she didn't know she had she sprang forward from behind the tree. She sent a flurry of disarming spells at him and he was momentarily taken off-guard, but it was enough for her to be swallowed up by the foliage in her attempt to escape.

Her head start was fleeting though. She heard him right behind her. She dodged and weaved as he sent spells at her. She felt the brambles and thicket tearing at her skirt as she fled through it. She winced as a thorn tore a jagged gash in her right arm as she passed by a large dense bush. A second later another thorn sliced her right cheek open, blood flowing down her cheek and chin. She ignored the pain and the oozing blood and a few moments later she burst out of the dense thicket and immediately tried to apparate. But a glancing blow from of Harry's spells knocked her down and she rolled and scurried behind the nearest tree. She was breathing heavy, she had a lot of cuts and bruises, and she felt a bit winded. She hadn't dueled like this since the last battle.

She heard him exit the brush and stop breathing hard. She peered around the tree and saw him looking around trying to find her. His eyes were wild with anger and desperation. He knew she didn't apparate and probably couldn't as one of his spells must have hit her. She closed her eyes and knew she needed to stop him, but she wanted to reason with him one last time. She cast a silent dis-apparition spell and took a deep breath.

"Please Harry! Stop!" she called out, her voice echoing in the woods.

He tried to hone in on her voice, "No! I need your help, Hermione!"

"I'm not helping you this way!" she shouted back. Taking a quick look and seeing he wasn't looking her way she retreated deeper into the groove of trees.

He looked from his left to his right and slowly and quietly started towards the trees. He missed seeing her dart between the trees away from him.

"Don't you understand? If I die then this all ends!" he angrily shouted at her.

She closed her eyes at the painful thought of that, "No Harry," she replied, "If you die then all you do is leave behind people who love you and care about you."

"Those people were killed years ago," came his flat reply.

Hermione felt a tear escape as his comment, "No Harry, there are many… so many more."

He knew she had to be in the clump of trees ahead of him, but which one. He sent a spell which blew a tree apart. Hermione flinched even though the tree was only a few meters from where she was. The loud explosion, the cracking of the splintered wood and the loud crash as the tree fell to the forest floor deafeningly resounded in hers. She felt the splinters prick her skin like many little mosquito bites, but she willed herself not to react and give herself away. Once the dust settled a bit she peeked around and saw him headed to her right, but not looking at her. Keeping him in sight as best as she could while covering herself, she silently backed away from him more.

"You don't have to try and sleep hearing her scream for him to not kill me. Then hear her scream as she dies," he paused, "Or to look into your godfather's eyes as he dies. Or to see your mentor die because I would die instead if he didn't."

Hermione closed her eyes to the pain that was emanating from his voice. She knew everything that he was talking about. His most painful memories.

"I can help you," she called out, looking for another path around him, "I always have been here for you. Always."

"And look where that's gotten you," he shouted back, "Obliviating your parents, you nearly dying more times than I can count, and then having to watch as I go off and die," he gave a pained laugh, "Some life."

"But one I wouldn't trade for the world Harry," she peeked around her tree. She saw a flash 10 meters to her left, "I wouldn't have met the person who is the bravest and caring person I can think of. I would never have met my best friend and forged a bond with him that can never be broken."

He stopped, turning his head towards her voice and shook his head, "No, not your best friend," he hissed venomously, "Just a source of pain and suffering."

"No Harry," she said and her voice choked up for a moment, "You're wrong. You are my best friend. My source of strength and courage when I have none," she took in a deep breath and with a silent prayer said the one thing she had been holding in for the last 14 years, "And the person I love more than anything else in this world."

He stopped in his tracks. She saw the flurry of conflicting emotions in his face. She knew that this was her moment. She could disarm him and stun him. Then take him to St. Mungo's for help. She took a deep breath and sprang from behind her tree.

"Expelliarmus!"

He whirled around at the sudden movement to his left, "Protego!" he deflected her spell and with a flourish of his wand, "Deffindo!"

Hermione ducked back behind her tree like lightning and felt the slashing spell cut into the tree her hand was on. She sprang back out, "Petrificus Totalus!"

Harry blocked her spell, "Incendio!"

Hermione was a half a second to slow in diving behind a tree as the ball of flame roar past her. Her left sleeve caught on fire and she screamed in pain as the flame burned her sleeve and flesh before she quickly doused the fire from water from her wand. She growled in painful anger and she quickly fired off a stunning spell and dove behind another nearby tree. A spell took a good-sized chunk from the trunk of the tree where her head had been a half a heartbeat before. She tried calming her breathing before sending another spell Harry's way and watched as he easily dodged out of the way. She rolled to her knees and saw him approaching her like a powerful dragon.

They fired off spells at the same moment and the spells impacted each other and exploded in a bright blueish color. The result was ten feet of ground and brush ripped apart and charred. Hermione sprang to her left behind a large pine to avoid Harry's following spell. She whirled back around and fired her responding spell. From that moment the two best friends fought each other. Neither holding back. The flurry and intensity of their spells had the air surrounding them crackling with energy. Anyone who might have witnessed their battle would have been awed by the mastery and power Harry and Hermione were channeling into their spells. Indeed, it would be as if they were watching two titans slugging it out for supremacy, but each for a different reason.

Harry was desperate to end his life of pain and anguish. Try as he might he could not get Hermione to send off the killing curse. What Harry didn't know was that she didn't understand why he wanted to die. She wanted to help him work through it, not end his life.

And so they fought on. Trees exploding and branches, limbs, and debris raining down on them. Grunts of pain and effort from both as each spell was sent and they evaded them. Both receiving cuts, bruises, and scrapes. Dirt and grime covering them. Each pouring their very souls into their mission for the other.

Hermione knew she was getting more tired with each spell. Harry didn't look as if he was faring any better. She knew Harry was pouring his full anger and power into each spell, where she was more conservative, but using the power when she needed too. Regardless of her efforts to try and save her energy, Hermione knew she needed to end this soon or there would be nothing left for her to do but give Harry what he sought. But she still couldn't bring herself to do it. She wanted to save him from himself. She took cover behind a tree and gathered her strength. She took a few calming breaths and with a feint to her right, she drew Harry's fire and then with a move that would have seemed as if she was moving at the speed of light she twisted back around.

"Expelliarmus! Incarcerous!"

Harry was taken completely by surprise. His wand flew from his grasp and a second later he was bound tightly in Hermione's magical ropes. He fell to the ground on his back with a dull thud. He fought for a few moments against them but was too exhausted to escape. He stopped fighting and lay on the ground breathing heavily.

With that silence came to the Forest of Dean.

Hermione, wand still pointed at Harry, tried to regain her breath and energy. Breathing heavily, she staggered and leaned again a tree to try and steady herself. She watched as Harry struggled flutily against her bindings again, then gave up. She pulled herself together enough stagger a few steps and bent down to pick up Harry's wand. She put it in her arm holster and then with her last strength her legs had, staggered and dropped heavily next to Harry on the ground. She groaned in pain and tiredness.

She looked down at him and saw the pleading in his face, "Please 'Mione," he pleaded, his eyes behind his broken glasses echoing the pain in his voice, "Please."

14 years of emotions suddenly surfaced for Hermione. Unlike at her parent's house, this emotion was more of despair than sadness. She felt her warm tears roll down her cheeks and she shook her head. The look in his eyes, they want to be at peace, broke her heart.

"No Harry," she sniffed trying again to convince him, "I won't."

Tears fell from his eyes, "Please."

She sobbed aloud and cupped his face in her hands, "No, I can't… I'm sorry Harry. Please don't ask me to help you like the this."

"'Mione," he whispered imploring, "I can't stand it anymore."

"Harry, I love you," she rested her forehead on his, "Please, stay with me. I can't live without you. I need you."

"I want to go home, 'Mione," he sobbed, "I just want to go home."

The torment she heard in his voice finally broke her resolve. At that moment she knew that he would never be whole again. He would never be himself. Despite what her father had told her about staying positive, she knew at that moment, looking into his eyes, that she had indeed lost him in every way in this world except for his physical body. He was only a shell of the person she had grown to love. She looked into his eyes and then kissed him as sweetly and lovingly as she could. Channeling all her love into that one kiss. She reached down, picked up her wand and held it to his temple.

"I am sorry Harry," she whispered to him, "I failed you."

His eyes and his body relaxed in her arms and with utter relief, in his eyes, he looked into her eyes, "Thank you, 'Mione," he whispered in relief, "Thank you."

She closed her eyes, not wanting to watch, "Avada Kedavra!"

A bright flash of green and she suddenly slumped forward with the sudden weight in her arms. She dropped her wand and held the lifeless form of the man that had been and still was the most important person she would ever know. She laid him gently on the ground, her lower lip trembling and looked through her tears at his face.

The pain and anguish were gone.

Harry James Potter was finally at peace.

Hermione closed her eyes, threw back her head and let out an almighty cry of anguish that echoed throughout the shattered forest. 20 years of pent up anger, frustration and pain resounded through the forest in her scream. Birds stopped chirping silent, animals stopped moving and looked around in worry, and the forest became as silent as a tomb. She fell against his chest and sobbed uncontrollably. Her body was wracked with grief and shook uncontrollably from her crying. She cried for what seemed like hours. She cried even after she had no tears left to cry.

Her soul was in agony. As she lay there crying on his chest, she remembered that her father was partially correct when he said Harry was her passionate side. Harry was more than that… Hermione knew that Harry was truly the other half of her soul. The part that now was gone. And gone by her hand. The part of her soul that was tortured with grief and pain would now never know peace because she gave him his peace. She took on his pain by ending his. Willingly. As a friend and as someone who loved someone else would.

Her head lay on his chest while she looked blankly into the forest. She was gripping his clothes tight in her fists and was not going to let go. The brightest witch of her age had just done the unthinkable, but because he had asked her to and because she loved him more than anything, she gave him the peace he didn't have in this life.

"Hermione?"

She suddenly bolted upright at the voice calling her name.

"Hermione?"

She turned around looking for the source and saw a ghostly form of a woman standing next to them, smiling above her. The ghostly woman then looked down at Harry and her face became somber.

Hermione slowly stood and recognized the ghost. Her eyes went wide with surprise and she received a soft, sad smile in return.

"Yes," the woman said before Hermione could speak, "I am her."

"But… but… why?" Hermione whispered in disbelief.

"I had to come," she replied, "For him and for you."

The ghost looked at the man on the ground and gave him a sorrowful smile, "He's had a very hard life," she looked at Hermione with the same smile, "Far harder than anyone should have had."

Hermione was speechless, but there were tears again running down her cheeks. She just nodded, unsure she would be able to speak.

"I know what you did was the hardest thing you have had to do, or will have to do," the ghost paused, "I know you loved him very, very much."

"As much as you loved him," Hermione replied in a whisper.

The ghost smile widened and she nodded, "Yes. But your love is why I am here."

Hermione was confused and her face mirrored that emotion. The ghost gave a soft laugh, "I know you're confused, but you need to understand Hermione that where Harry is concerned, death and love are two things where logic does not and cannot apply."

The ghost looked at Hermione with a serious expression, "You complete him. He was a broken and incomplete person until you two met. Then he began to heal."

Hermione shook her head, "No," she said resolutely, "Harry never healed. For seven years he kept getting assaulted by that monster and was never able to recover from it."

The ghost looked thoughtfully before replying, "For once Hermione, you are wrong," Hermione's eyes widened in disbelief at the statement, "You are right that Voldemort did relentlessly attack Harry, but Harry was only able to withstand those attacks because of his soul-healing itself."

"But… how?" Hermione asked, then her tone turned angry, "It's not like he got any love or comfort from his aunt and uncle."

The ghost looked away in regret, "Yes, but then Harry never saw them as his source of strength," she looked back at Hermione intently, "You were his strength."

Hermione shook her head, "Not just me. Ron, Remus, Sirius, Dumbledore…"

"True," the ghost interrupted and pointed a finger at Hermione, "But you were his main source of strength. Your love, your unconditional love of him, was what helped him the most."

"And that's a wonderful feeling," she looked down and then back at Hermione, "There's nothing in the universe more wonderful than loving someone," the ghost smiled at Hermione, "Love him, Hermione."

"I wanted too, but…," she looked down at Harry, her words choking in her throat, "I'm not sure how I could have helped him with that. Being loved is not something Harry has a lot of experience with."

"Sirius was right you know. You are just like me," she smiled, "so I know you'll figure it out."

Hermione only nodded and then looked at the ghost with confusion, "Wait, wha…."

"There is one more thing," the woman's interrupting voice turned serious, almost pleading, "You must help him forgive himself."

"Forgive himself?" Hermione's left eyebrow went up in confusion.

She pointed down at Harry, her eyes became imploring, "You must help him forgive himself for what he feels or he will be lost to you."

"Of course," Hermione said immediately as if there was ever any doubt, "I'll help and support him any way I can."

"You are so special and an equal for Harry," the ghost gave Hermione a knowing smile, "Trust me when I say that I know that Harry will forgive himself because you'll be there to help him and he'll love you even more for it."

"I must go," the ghost gave Hermione one last smile, "My last wish for you… be happy. Love him for me," and with those last words, the woman faded out of sight.

Hermione's eyes sprang open. She took a ragged breath before remembering where she was. She had no idea how long she had been in that position, but she was sore. Then she remembered the ghostly vision. She must have had a dream. She was still laying on Harry's chest, having apparently cried herself asleep. She closed her eyes again and felt another wave of grief about to crash upon her.

Thump…

She missed it at first. Her mind was still numb to the world around her.

Thump-thump…

Her eyes widened. Where was that coming from?

Thump-thump…

She felt the vibration against her ear and cheek.

Thump-thump…

She gasped in shock and listened harder.

Thump-thump…

She bolted upright and looked at the pale form in front of her. She placed a hand over his heart and prayed she wasn't imagining it.

Thump-thump…

She let out a cry of joy that resounded in the woods around her as she felt his chest slowly rise with a breath. There was color returning to his face. Somehow… he had survived and had been sent back to her.

"Harry?" she called to him with hope in her voice. She shifted position to kneel over him, "Harry, can you hear me?"

After a tense breathless moment, a soft groan came from him. Hermione let out a loud laugh of elation and cupped his face in her hands and looked into his face.

"Harry… please… can you hear me?" she kissed his lips, "I love you, Harry. Please stay with me."

"'Mione…," he whispered.

She let out a silent 'thank you' to the ghost, "I'm here Harry," she replied holding his face tenderly in her hands, "I'm not leaving you."

He gave another soft groan before passing out. Hermione quickly grabbed her wand, with a wave she lowered her dis-apparition spell. She gripped her wand tight, wrapped her arms around him, and with a loud thunderous crack she apparated them out of the Forest of Dean.


	8. Chapter 8 - Revelation

Revelation

The receptionist sat behind her desk and was reading the most current edition of _Witch Weekly_ when her day became suddenly much busier. Up until this moment there had been little to do during her shift as many people knew where they were going or asked simple questions, which didn't offer much challenge or effort on her part. She was excited to read the steamy gossip about the new seeker of the Chudley Cannons and an on-and-off again affair with a prominent witch actress who had been dating another wizarding actor. The receptionist, whose own love life was hardly even worth mentioning, ate up all the gossip that she was reading.

But with a loud crack and the ground shaking beneath her feet, her day changed.

She dropped her magazine with a scream of fright and toppled out of her chair. Her breath was knocked from her body when she impacted with the polished tiled floor and with a little effort she rolled over and tried to regain her breath and see what had caused the loud disturbance.

She looked over her desk to see a bushy brown-haired woman laying over a ragged and injured man. The receptionist's brows furrowed together as she noticed the equal amount of injuries the woman had as well as a completely charred left arm. The woman's hair, which the receptionist could see was usually kept up, was now disheveled and her clothes were torn and dirty. The two looked like a pair of homeless people and unrecognizable for who they really were.

Some of her courage and resolve returned to the receptionist when she wasn't immediately attached. She stood and with as much disapproval she could muster in her voice snapped, "Miss, what is the mean…"

Then the woman's brown piercing eyes shot up and locked on hers. The look stopped the receptionist cold in mid-sentence.

"Get a healer her now!"

The tone in the injured woman's voice made the receptionist jump into action for fear of what happened if she hesitated. She quickly sent a patronus message to fetch the healer, well healers. After all, after witnessing someone that could apparate through the wards of St. Mungo's, then more than one healer might be warranted. She then had some presence of mind and sent a second patronus message to the hospital's resident Aurors to come to the lobby. Again, anyone who could apparate through the wards was dangerous to say the least.

She sat down behind her desk as the woman checked on the man and apparently was ignoring her, and everyone else in the lobby.

"Harry," she heard the woman say to the unconscious man softly, "Hang on. We're at St. Mungo's. They'll be here soon to help you. Stay with me."

The receptionist looked around the room and saw everyone was still in a state of shock at the sudden appearance of the two. Many were wide-eyed in shock and more than a couple had taken to hiding behind their chairs.

Suddenly the doors leading into the main hospital burst open and two healers came rushing through. They paused to take in the sight of everyone, before their eyes locked on the man and woman on the floor. With only a moment's hesitation between them, they immediately rushed to their sides.

"I'm Healer Thurston and this is Healer Young," said the older of the two, "What happened?"

"Magical duel," then a moment's hesitation before the woman replied, "And the killing spell."

The healers stopped and looked at each other in shock before looking back down at the patient.

"Uh, Miss," the younger one began, "This guy surviving the killing curse is impossible. Are you sure it was the killing curse?"

The woman nodded, "Yes, I'm sure," she said. Then glanced at him briefly before adding with a hard tone, "I'm the one who used it on him."

Both healers again stopped their work and gave each other an anxious glance. They were not sure what to say at this point, but Thurston seemed to regain his voice faster than his colleague.

"But Miss," Thurston said somewhat exasperated, "There's only one person who ever survived the killing curse. Well twice if I remember right. But he's been missing for over a decade!"

The woman gave him a hard stare, "Well this would be number three for him then," she said matter-of-factly.

Thurston looked down at the man in complete shock as he immediately understood the information she just told him, "Merlin's Beard… this is Harry Potter?" he breathed and then returned to treating Harry with suddenly renewed vigor.

Young gave Thurston a queried look before looking back and really taking in the woman with him. Hermione could see the exact moment when Young comprehended who she was and who they were treating, "You don't say?" was Young's clever reply. Thurston was still oblivious of that fact that she was Hermione Granger as he was concentrating on treating Harry.

Hermione became annoyed with them both and her tone reflected her annoyance, "I do say, now will you two get your wands out of your arses and help him!"

Both healers, hearing her orders and the sharp tone, immediately went back to work. Both understanding at the same time that Hermione was not making any allowances for delays.

"We need to get him into a room," Thurston said after a moment, "He's not exactly stable, but there's little choice here, we have to move him to a room quickly."

Young levitated Harry and they rush through the doors they just came from, with Hermione right behind them. Barely a minute later they settled Harry into a bed. It seemed like hours to Hermione as the healers completed their scans of Harry. They quickly and in even tones consulted with each other as they went. Finally, after what was in reality only about fifteen minutes, they both turned and told the assembled nurses what potions to bring. Once the room cleared out Thurston turned to Hermione.

"Now that we're starting our treatments on Mr. Potter," he leveled her with a stern gaze, "What in Merlin's name were you doing using the killing curse on him? And just who are you?"

Hermione wasn't fazed by the healer's intensely stern gaze, but returned an even and impassive one, "I'm Hermione Granger."

Thurston's stern gaze evaporated and he stared again in surprise at seeing her. Not only did he have The Boy Who Saved Them in front of him lying on the bed, but The Brightest Witch of Her Age sitting across from him. However, his momentary surprise gave way to confusion, "Wh… wh… why did you try and kill him?"

She ignored the healer's question, but asked, "Is Harry going to be okay?"

"Not quite sure," came Young's answer from the other side of the bed. He looked up at her from looking at Harry, "We've never treated anyone who's survived the killing curse once, let alone three times. Plus, the amount of magical energy he's expended is considerable. He's almost dead just from that."

"I assume then you had something to do with that too?" Thurston asked with a raised eyebrow.

She nodded and sat down heavily in a chair next to Harry's bed. She was so tired, but knew that she would not be able to rest for some time yet. Remembering that she might be in trouble and to let Mr. Weasley know she had succeeded, she pulled out her wand and sent her patronus with a message to him. Just as the patronus vanished, two Aurors burst in, wands pointed at Hermione.

"You there! Stop and hands up!"

The two healers jumped at the sudden entrance and then Thurston turned on them.

"Are you two quite done here!" he exclaimed in an admonishing tone, "What's the meaning of this… over-exuberance in my hospital?!"

"Stay back Healer," the taller Auror said, his eyes never leaving Hermione, "We understand that she used the killing curse on that man."

"Yes, I know that," Thurston replied, addressing them like they were uncomprehending children, "You can put your wands away."

"No Healer," the shorter one said, as he started edging towards Hermione, "She a dangerous witch and…"

Thurston waved his hand is a dismissive gesture to the shorter Auror, "Oh yes, yes, yes…," his tone sarcastic, "She's so dangerous that she's destroyed half the hospital and used the killing curse on Healer Young here just so she can get Mr. Potter help with his injuries. Thank Merlin you both were here to save us from a woman who's about to pass out from magical and emotional exhaustion."

Both Aurors paused in their moments and flashed each other a confused look, "Mr. Potter?"

"Yeees," Thurston said and pointed to the man in the bed, "Mr. Potter. And before you ask the next obvious question running through your brains… yes _the_ Harry Potter."

Both Aurors looked quickly at Harry. They were shocked to see that the man in the bed bore no resemblance to the Boy Who Lived. However, they still weren't giving up on their mission. They returned their gaze to Hermione, who for her part had been ignoring them from the moment they burst through the door.

"I'm sorry Healer, but we need to take her into custody. She used an Unforgivable Cure on your patient."

"And you are certainly doing your duty by arresting her," came a deep voice from the doorway.

Hermione looked up and sighed with relief at the sight of Kingsley Shacklebolt standing in the doorway, looking quite formidable in his colorful robes and general presence.

"Minister?" the taller Auror looked confused. He quickly recovered, "Sir, best you leave. She's a dangerous and…"

Kingsley held up his hand and interrupted the Auror with a quirk of a smile on his lips, "Oh she is indeed quite dangerous and I for one have no illusions to her power. However, I also know that Miss Granger was acting upon my behest to search and find Mr. Potter and try and bring him in."

The two Aurors looked at each other, uncertain what to do, "But Minister," the short one began.

Kingsley silenced the man with one look, "Again, I commend you both for your diligence, however, this matter is under my office's jurisdiction. Now I would ask that you both stand guard outside and await instruction from Head Auror Guerin."

Both Aurors took Kingsley's tone and hand gesture towards the door as a sign that they were summarily dismissed and bade a hasty exit from the room.

Kingsley shook his head as he watched them leave before turning to Thurston, "Healer?"

Thurston's mouth had also twisted into a wry smile at the interaction between the Minister and the two Aurors, but pulled himself back to his patient, "Minister, Mr. Potter is in serious condition, but we are treating him with everything we can think of. His magical core is almost exhausted and he was hit with the killing cure," he flashed a look towards Hermione, "For the third time."

"Will he recover?" Kingsley asked, noting Hermione's ears perk up at the question.

Thurston's face fell and Young cleared his throat. Young looked between Hermione and Kingsley before replying, "Not sure yet Minister. We'll know more in a few hours after he's taken the potions and the treatments are started."

Kingsley nodded gravely, looking at the haggard form in the bed before him. He noticed Hermione's burnt left arm.

"Healer, could you please treat Miss. Granger please while we wait," he asked pointing to Hermione's burnt arm, "She appears injured as well."

Thurston nodded and immediately went over to Hermione, scanned her with his wand and gently began to examine her before asking her what caused the burn. After a few moments of Thurston asking question and Hermione's one or two-word answers, Thurston stood and looked back at the Minister's expectant face.

"Severe burns on her left arm. Multiple lacerations. She's lost a good amount of blood. But even more serious Minister… her magical core is nearly as exhausted as Mr. Potter's," he paused and gave a quick look at Hermione before looking back at the Minister, "If she fired any more spells, even low powered ones, she would be just as near to death. I'm not even sure where she got the power to apparate straight into the hospital," he looked back at Hermione, "She took quite a pounding Minister. More than what is possible in my opinion, but here she is," he finished before exiting the room to get the required treatments for Hermione.

Kingsley quietly approached Hermione and kneeled next to her chair. He looked at her for a moment just staring blankly at Harry with tired eyes. He placed a hand carefully on her knee and she turned and looked at him, her face despondent. He regarded the woman with a warm expression.

"He asked me to do it, Kingsley" she said before he could speak, tears welling in her eyes, "He was in so much pain from what he went through. In the end he just wanted to be at peace and see his family."

Kingsley nodded solemnly at her words, "It's okay Hermione. You have well my friend. Rest now. We can talk later."

He stood and saw Arthur Weasley and Hermione's parents enter the room and stop dead in the doorway. All three were staring in shock at the man who lay in the bed.

"Great Merlin's Beard," Mr. Weasley's comment whispered so loudly in the quiet room.

"Oh my God! Hermione you're hurt!" her mother exclaimed and rushed to her side. Her father quickly joined his wife at Hermione's side and the two fell into doctor mode immediately.

Kingsley stood by Mr. Weasley, "Thank you for bringing them Arthur."

"Of course. I thought it best under the circumstances," Mr. Weasley said, still unable to look from Harry, "Is he going to be…?" he couldn't finish his question.

"Unsure," Kingsley replied with a touch of worry, "But we're thankful Hermione immediately brought him here," he looked at Hermione being fussed over by her parents before turning back to Mr. Weasley, "I'll deal with the guard for this room and wing. Don't rush getting back tom the office Arthur. I'm sure Molly would want to be here and you should tell everyone."

Mr. Weasley broke from looking at Harry, "Yes, yes… thank you, Kingsley. I'll tell Molly now, but I'll hold off on telling the others until he's stable. No sense having this place invaded until we know for sure."

"Very sensible," Kingsley agreed and left the room, passing Thurston in the doorway.

Mr. Weasley looked once more at Harry before joining the group around Hermione's chair. Thurston returned and managed to work his way to Hermione and started his treatment. Mr. Weasley stood back and watched as Hermione was treated. He saw Thurston become annoyed at the constant questions from the two older Grangers and was about to interject when Mrs. Granger explained that they were dentists and had medical training in the muggle world. After that, Thurston lost is annoyance and the three doctors began a lively back and forth, with Thurston explaining the intricacies of his treatments to the Grangers while the Grangers told Thurston how muggles would treat Hermione's wounds.

After a short time of this, Hermione snapped at all three of them to stop and leave her be. Her parents immediately stopped talking and looked at each other in concern for Hermione's reaction. Thurston, hearing the hardness in Hermione's tone, quickly finished tending to her and telling her that she would be right as rain in a couple of days. He spent only a moment, and with a flick of his wand, wrapping a bandage around her arm and explained that she could remove it in the morning.

He stood and the room was busy for several minutes as the nurses returned with Harry's treatments. Then as both healers carried out Harry's treatments, they explained to the Grangers what they were doing. Thurston and the Grangers this time keeping the medical conversation focused on Harry, lest they unleash Hermione's ire again. Once they were done, all the nurses and both healers left with a final comment from Thurston that it might be several hours before they knew anything.

Then silence was the only thing heard in the room.

After a few moments, Mrs. Granger pulled a second chair by Hermione's and sat down.

She looked at her exhausted daughter, "What happened Hermione?"

Hermione closed her eyes and summoned the strength to answer. She was so tired, but knew she needed to tell her mother what happened. She took a deep breath and looked at her mother with tired, red eyes, "He was living in the Forest of Dean, where we hid during the war."

"Why there?" her father asked.

Hermione shook her head, "I'm not sure, other than it was a place where we felt safe during the war. It's possible that he may have felt that he would be safe there too," she let out a tired sigh and shook her head in disbelief, "He was sleeping in a hollowed-out log on a bed of leaves and moss."

"Hermione," Mr. Weasley conjured two more chairs, one for himself and the other for her father, then sat across from her with Harry's bed in between them, "The healers said you performed the killing curse on Harry. I'm sorry to ask this my dear, but why?"

Hermione took a ragged breath as the tears welled in her eyes again, "I found him and tried to reason with him. He kept telling me that everything was his fault. That Voldemort was not the cause of everyone's pain, but him. He said if Voldemort hadn't come after him that half of the wizarding community would not have been destroyed."

She paused at looked at Mr. Weasley, "Harry blames himself for what happened to Fred."

Mr. Weasley face softened to sadness at Hermione's remark, but shook his head. He looked at Harry and said softly to the unconscious man, "Oh my son, that was not your fault and I certainly never blamed you for it."

"I tried telling him that," Hermione said and wiped away a tear, "But he wouldn't listen or believe me."

She turned to her mother, "Then I saw that look," her mother's brow furrow for a moment in confusion before comprehension replaced it.

"The look that he was going to die," her mother said.

Hermione nodded, "I knew that at that moment Harry saw his way out."

"Good God," Mr. Granger whispered in shock, realizing what Hermione was getting at.

"I couldn't do it Mum," Hermione said in earnest, "I couldn't do it. But… but he kept begging me…," she sobbed and stopped talking.

"How did you get burned Sweetheart?" Mr. Granger asked, trying to change the subject.

"From one of Harry's spells."

Mr. Weasley's eyes nearly popped out of his head with surprise, "What?! You two fought each other?"

Hermione nodded, unable to trust herself to speak through her tears.

Mr. Weasley sat back in shock at this news, "Merlin," he breathed, "In my entire life I will never hear such surprising news as that. The thought of you two fighting each other is just… it boggles the mind."

Hermione fought to regain her composure. She was so tired, but knew she had to get it out, "I didn't want to. I didn't want to fight him," she looked at Harry sleeping, "But he was trying to get me to kill him."

"He saw you as his way out," Mr. Granger said.

Hermione nodded, "Harry knew that if anyone could it would be me and that he trusted I would understand, but…," her voice caught, "I couldn't do it."

"But you must have, Hermione," Mr. Weasley said, "How?"

Hermione bit her lower lip and felt the tears rolling down her face. Her mother reached out and gingerly took her hands in hers and gave them a squeeze.

"Hermione, I know this is hard," she told her daughter, "But you need to let it out."

Hermione nodded, knowing that her mother was right.

"We fought so long and so hard, but I finally managed to trick him and was able to disarm and bind him," she began, "I practically collapsed by his side I was so tired. He was tired too. That's why he couldn't unbind himself like I know he could have," her voice became suddenly hollow and distant as her mind went back to that moment, "He pleaded with me to end it. He was tired and in pain remembering all the suffering we all went through and what it cost him."

Her eyes focused on Harry in the bed, "I told him I loved him and that I couldn't do it," she stopped as her voice caught again and she barely finished, "but he said he wanted to go home and be with his family," her eyes focused on her mother, "I saw the pain in his eyes. I saw the torment."

She sniffed and looked at her parents and Arthur, "I loved him too much to keep him here with that pain and he saw it in my eyes," she looked at her mother as if asking forgiveness, "He relaxed in my arms knowing that he was going to be at peace. I saw the relief in his eyes as he thanked me. So, I…," she silently cried unable to finish.

Mrs. Granger hugged her daughter tight against her, crying herself. Mr. Granger looked at Hermione in shock at the recounting of what happened. Mr. Weasley closed his eyes in sympathy and felt the tear escape his eye. With the exception of the soft sobbing from Hermione and her mother, there was nothing else heard in the room for several minutes.

Mrs. Granger broke her embrace of her daughter and cupped Hermione's face in her hands, "Oh my precious girl, look at me," Hermione's eyes looked up at her mother's eyes, "I cannot for a moment imagine what you must have been feeling then or even now. But I know that whatever happened, he is alive and here with us… with you," she looked at Harry and back to her daughter, "What you did is one of the hardest things in the universe to be asked to do. But you were brave for him and loved him enough to know that was the right thing to do."

"Your mother is right Hermione," Mr. Weasley said with a soft smile, "I certainly could not have said it any better."

Emma kissed Hermione lightly on the forehead and looked into her daughter's eyes, "Your father and I know that and we agree that what you did was right," Hermione flashed a look at her father and saw his head nodding and his face confirming her mother's statement. She looked back at her mother as she continued, "And no matter what happens, you need to understand that what you did was an act of pure love."

Hermione nodded and then her eyes widened in surprise, "An act of pure love," she whispered as she had an epiphany.

Mrs. Granger looked at her daughter in confusion at Hermione's sudden excitement, "Hermione?"

Hermione wiped her face and looked back at Harry, "An act of pure love," she turned back to her mother, "I understand now, Mum! It was an act of pure love that saved Harry from my killing curse!"

Hermione's parents looked at each other in utter incomprehension at what their daughter was raving about.

"We don't understand what you're talking about, Sweetheart," Mr. Granger said bewildered about his daughter could be crying one second and excited the next. He looked at Arthur in confusion, "Arthur? Do you know what she's talking about?"

Mr. Weasley shook his head, just as confused.

Hermione looked at Mr. Weasley intently, "Mr. Weasley, remember how Harry was saved by Voldemort's first killing curse?"

Mr. Weasley's brow furrowed in remembrance, "From some ancient magic his mother used if I remember right."

"Not quite," Hermione said, "It was ancient magic yes, but it was an act of pure love! Dumbledore always said that love was the only power Voldemort didn't have and couldn't understand."

"Slow down Sweetheart," Mr. Granger said, his mind whirling trying to understand, "We're having trouble keeping up."

Hermione turned to him, "Dad, Harry's mother died protecting him and her love of him helped seal the ancient magic to protect him from being killed when he was one."

"Got that part," Mr. Granger replied, with some confusion still in his voice, "But what about when Voldemort killed him again?"

"Harry didn't die for two reasons," Hermione said suddenly stopped talking and looked away as another thought occurred to her, "Oh that's brilliant!" she exclaimed to the room at large, "She was bloody brilliant!"

"What's brilliant? Who's brilliant?" Mrs. Granger asked slightly annoyed. She was getting frustrated and it was evident when she spoke, "Hermione, you always have had an annoyin…"

Hermione didn't hear her mother as she interrupted, "Harry was saved a second time because the piece of Voldemort's soul that was in Harry was killed by the curse. More importantly, Harry's love for all of us was the second part of that ancient magic from his mother that saved him as well! She knew it too and what ramifications it would have! That's why she did it!"

Mr. Weasley, the only other wizard in the room who might understand what Hermione was talking about, looked at Hermione with some doubt, "How do you figure that my dear? Dumbledore never told us about that part."

"I know he didn't," Hermione said her voice now building with excitement at finally solving a 14-year-old puzzle, "But Harry did tell me and Ron what Dumbledore said to him after he had died in the forest by Voldemort's killing curse."

"Wait," Mr. Granger held up a hand to interrupt, "Harry spoke to Dumbledore _after _he died?" he asked incredulously.

Hermione nodded, "Yes, Dumbledore gave him the option of continuing with him to be with his parents or come back to us and finish Voldemort."

"And Harry obviously chose us," Mr. Granger said.

"Because Harry loved us," Hermione replied, "His act of pure love to sacrifice himself and then choosing to comeback is what saved him then. Don't you see? When Harry decided to comeback, he completed the spell his mother started! That ancient magic was transferred to all of us by Harry's sacrifice so Voldemort could never hurt anyone again."

"Oh by George," Mr. Weasley said, finally understanding what Hermione was explaining to them, "Then in this case, he was saved by your act of love when you used the killing curse on him."

"Right!" Hermione exclaimed, excited Mr. Weasley understood, "Harry can't die from the killing curse because I acted in pure love. I used that ancient magic he passed on to me on him because we are bonded to him by that magic."

She looked away in sudden comprehension, "And that's what she was trying to explain to me in the woods," she said aloud.

"When who was telling you what in the woods Hermione?" her mother asked.

"His mother," Hermione said to the shocked looks from the three other adults.


	9. Chapter 9 - The Morning After

The Morning After

"His mother?!"

Hermione nodded at her mum. Emma Granger sat back in shock at the revelation her daughter just gave them. She looked at her equally shocked husband in silence for a few moments before looking over at Arthur Weasley. The red-headed wizard looked dumbfounded, but not shocked at the news that The Boy Who Lived dead mother returned from the Great Beyond and spoke with Hermione.

"Sweetheart, I think you need to explain that a bit more for us," Hermione's father asked, trying to keep his voice neutral.

Hermione took a deep breath. Her sudden burst of energy was now ebbing and she was getting even more tired than before, "After… well, after…," she paused then kept going after they nodded understanding, "I must have cried myself to sleep or the exhaustion from the battle or something, but she came to me as a ghost. She explained that death and love are not something that are simple and logical explanations with Harry. She's right, and it is because of that ancient magic that she imbued him, and then all of us with."

Hermione looked at Harry and then back to her mother, "But that's what she was trying to tell me. That he would be coming back to me. And that I needed to love him as he needed to be loved. I needed to complete the spell because I love him. Then she faded away and I woke up."

Hermione stopped talking and the room descended into silence again as the other adults in the room processed what Hermione had just told them.

Emma Granger didn't know what to think. Ever since Harry had shown up in the destroyed home a few months ago, the ordered life she was accustomed to had been turned upside down. This was mostly due to how Hermione had been affected and what she had prepared for in case she had found Harry again. Now Emma looked at her daughter, who was nervously biting her lip again, and looking at her mother with a worried expression, and tried to understand the day's events.

In one day her daughter had rushed to see an old friend, battled that friend, killed him to spare him the pain he was going through, and to round out the day's bizarre events… Hermione had had a conversation with her best friend's dead mother's ghost. For not the first time in her life, Emma Granger was thankful that she had an open mind when it came to her daughter's magical world. Otherwise, she had no doubts that after hearing even a small part of what her daughter had told them over the years she would be currently eating soft food, in a soft-walled room in a secure facility.

"So where do we go from here?" Dan Granger's voice suddenly broke the quiet tension.

Hermione looked at Harry's sleeping form, "Obviously, get Harry better, but after that…?" she shook her head and shrugged, "I don't know."

Arthur cleared his throat, "If I might suggest that Harry stay here at St. Mungo's to heal from his magical and physical wounds. My two fears are that Harry trying to get away and once the wizarding world hears he's back if they don't know already, that he'll be hounded by them. So I'll post aurors to keep an eye on him and keep the rest of the lot out. I'll make sure the hospital's wards are strengthened so he can't bring them down and apparate out of here."

He looked at Hermione directly, "Then my dear comes the hard part. You need to help him heal his broken soul," he saw Hermione's eyes fill with fear at the prospect, "Now before you let your fear take hold and run wild in your mind, we all know that there's no one in the world Harry trusts more than you. Plus, your love for him will be something he can look for like a ship looking for a lighthouse in a storm as he gets better."

"Lastly, I think he should spend time in professional therapy here, but spend just as much time in places that can help him see there are others who love and care for him as well," he finished and looked between Hermione and her parents to see if they had any suggestions or concerns with his ideas.

"I agree with Arthur," Dan said, "That sounds like the best plan. And Harry's more than welcome to stay with Emma and I if he needs a place to help recover."

"Excellent," Arthur said with a smile, "Between your house, The Burrow, and perhaps Grimmauld Place, there should be plenty of places Harry can go to be out of sight of the rest of the wizarding world and still be able to have some peace and quiet."

Emma, watching her daughter's face as the two men talked, saw the apprehension take hold, "Hermione, you're apprehensive aren't you?"

Hermione nodded, "I'm an Executive Advisor to the Minister of Magic, not a psychologist! I have no training to help Harry with getting over any of what he's dealing with and I'm afraid that I'll do more damage than good," she quickly held up a finger to stop the three other who had collectively taken a breath to interrupt her, "But… buuut… that doesn't mean I don't want to be here for him," she looked at her mother with wide, scared eyes, "Merlin help me I do love this man more than anything and I want to be by his side while he works through this, but I don't know what to do to help him."

Emma closed her mouth and had to agree with her daughter. However, she realized quickly that, knowing her daughter, there would probably be a stack of books in the room on the subject of dealing with psychological trauma within an hour and her little bookworm would have her nose buried in one. However, she was heartened to hear the conviction in Hermione's voice that she loved Harry and wanted to be at his side while he dealt with his demons.

"My daughter," Emma began with a knowing smile on her lips, "Ever since you were three you have had a stubborn streak in you a kilometer wide. And in this case, I don't see any other outcome than that stubborn streak of yours, coupled with your love for Harry, coming out in full force. As a result, you'll make yourself learn what you need to do and I know you will do that," her smile got a bit bigger, "I'm even betting your mind is right now thinking of ways to help him or what you need to learn."

Hermione let out a soft laugh, as did the two men. Hermione had to agree that her mother did know her… and she was right. Hermione was already thinking about what she needed to ask and learn to better help Harry. Before they could talk further, a nurse came in with a bundle of folded clothes in her arms. She stopped in the doorway and smiled.

"I'm sorry. I don't want to interrupt, but I need to change him and clean him up."

Arthur immediately stood, "Yes! Right! I should go and get Molly and bring her back," with a wave of his wand the chair he sat on disappeared, "She'll probably jump all over me for not letting her know sooner, which will be a joy to experience. I'll see you all in a short bit."

He quickly left the room, allowing the nurse access to Harry. Dan and Emma Granger stood and looked at Hermione.

"We'll go grab some coffee or tea and come back in a bit," Emma said, "Do you want anything Hermione?'

Hermione shook her head, "No, thank you. I'll stay here with him."

Her parents silently nodded and left the room. Hermione watched the nurse as she undressed Harry. Hermione averted her eyes when the nurse removed Harry's pants and underwear. Although she didn't want to see him for the first time like this, she still laughed at herself for her modesty towards the man she had had many fantasies about. The nurse then washed and cleaned Harry, removing years of grime from him. Finally clean, she pulled up the loose pants and Hermione finally took in Harry's body and was horrified to see how thin and almost emaciated he was. She gasped at the sight. His ribs could be seen, his skin was very pale with a greyish tinge. There were many scars from cuts she couldn't even begin to know where they came from. Hermione had seen where he'd been sleeping, but this confirmed that Harry's life alone had been a very harsh one.

The nurse finished dressing him and with Hermione's help, propped him up better on the bed.

The nurse looked at Hermione, "I was going to give him a haircut and shave him," she paused and regarded Hermione with a curious look, "Unless you want to do it?"

"I'd like to do it if I could please," and she took out her wand.

The nurse nodded and stood back to watch in case Hermione had trouble. Hermione knew she would have no issues with giving Harry a haircut. During the seven months on the run, she had cut his hair many times and knew how he liked it done. She calmly went to her task and in a few minutes, the long poorly maintained raven hair was shortened to when she had last seen him before he disappeared. She smiled slightly as it still somehow managed to look in its permanently disheveled state even after she had finished.

With a wave of her wand, Harry's hair was cleaned from the bed and himself. Hermione then bent to her task to remove his long beard. She was definitely not a fan of Harry with a beard. The beard he grew over the last 14 years gave him a wild and unkempt look. She took her time and was as careful as she could be. After the last stroke, she sat back with a satisfied smile on her face. He was finally clean shaven, but then her smile faded.

Harry looked almost a lifetime older. The weight of the pain he carried for 14 years shown clearly on his clean-shaven face. She unconsciously ran her fingertips lightly across his forehead and sunken cheeks, physically feeling the years of strain on his face. Regardless though of what she saw and felt, he was still the handsome man she had seen 14 years ago.

A quite shifting from behind her brought Hermione out of her reverie. She smiled, "Sorry," she said and cleaned Harry's beard hair from Harry and the bed.

The nurse gave her a knowing smile, "There's nothing to be sorry about Miss. Granger. I understand completely."

Hermione gave her a small smile and nodded, "Thank you."

The nurse reached for the bundle of Harry's old clothes, "I'll just toss these then."

Hermione opened her mouth to agree when a gold flash fell from a pocket in the old clothes, bounced on the edge of the bed and landed on the floor with a metallic clank. The nurse bent down and picked it up. She held it out in front of her and then looked at Hermione with a questioning look.

"It's a snitch?"

Hermione gently took the snitch from the nurse and regarded it speculatively. Then like a lightning bolt, Hermione knew what it was.

"It's okay," she finally said to the nurse, trying to minimize the importance for the nurse, "It's a lucky charm of his. I'll hold on to it if that's okay?"

The nurse smiled and nodded, "Of course. I'll go toss these and be back later to check on him. Are you sure I can't get you anything?"

Hermione smiled and shook her head, "No thank you. I'm too tired to eat at this point. Looks like I'll be spending the night with him in the hospital as I usually did at Hogwarts," she looked at the chair she had been sitting in, "on that chair too," she looked at the nurse, "If that's okay of course?"

The nurse nodded at her. Knowing that even if did she had a problem with that, which she didn't, there was no one that could have removed the witch from Harry's side, "Of course Miss. Granger. Also, there's plenty of room if you want me to bring a cot in for you to sleep in here and not hurt yourself on that chair."

Hermione gave the nurse a smile of thanks, "Oh that would be just perfect. Thank you so much."

The nurse gave her a nod and wink and left the room. Hermione looked at the snitch in her hand. She recognized it almost the second she had held it. It was the snitch Harry had swallowed in his first Quidditch match. The same one Dumbledore had willed to Harry after his death and that had held the Resurrection Stone. She was amazed that Harry had kept this with him all this time. She knew when Harry had dropped the Resurrection Stone in the Forbidden Forest, she naturally assumed the snitch had been lost as well.

She gave it a soft squeeze and put it in her pocket. She returned to her chair and sat down heavily. Five minutes later the nurse returned and magically set up the cot and firmly ushered Hermione to lay down, reminding her that she needed to rest and recover from her injuries. Too tired to argue, but getting promises to be woken if any happened with Harry, Hermione climbed into the cot and was asleep before her head hit the pillow. Hermione was sleeping so deeply she didn't hear Mrs. Weasley come into the room not too long after and gasp loudly at seeing Harry. Nor was she aware when the older witch came around to her cot, conjured a blanket and lovingly draped it over her.

Molly regarded both of her surrogate children with a soft smile. She let out a sigh of relief when she looked again at Harry. She shook her head in sadness at seeing the years of strain on Harry's face. Moving the chair to better see them both, she pulled out her knitting needles and started knitting a new sweater. A short time later, Emma and Dan returned and joined her standing vigil over Harry and Hermione until the bright, golden morning light started to shine in through the windows.

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It was the smell of coffee, bacon, and toast that finally roused Hermione the morning after day. She allowed her mind to wake fully before trying to get her body moving. She immediately became aware of just how sore her body was. She honestly felt as if she had been beaten up by the Whomping Willow again like she had been in her fifth year. No, wait… this felt worse she decided. She groaned softly as she rolled over and opened her eyes.

She heard movement as her eyes focused and adjusted to the bright sunlight streaming into the room. She wasn't alone.

"Hermione my dear?"

The happy voice of Mrs. Weasley greeted Hermione's ears. She gave a small smile as she felt someone's hands helping her sit up. She looked and saw Fleur sitting on the edge of her cot and had been the hands helping Hermione to sit up. She gave the blonde witch a smile in thanks, tossed off the blanket and swung her legs around to sit on the edge of the cot.

"What time is it?" she asked running her hands through her wildly frizzy hair.

"Mid-morning," Mrs. Weasley said and came over to her holding out a clear vial with a smoking greenish liquid in it. Hermione took it from her and looked up at her questioningly.

Mrs. Weasley gave her an encouraging smile, "The healer said to drink the whole vial after you woke up. It's to help your soreness and any lingering magical fatigue."

Hermione nodded and drained the vial in one gulp. She nearly choked as the liquid suddenly burned the back of her throat and the taste finally registered on her tongue, "Ughhhhhh… that's absolutely vile," she grimaced and was happy when Fleur took the empty vial from her.

As bad as it tasted, she could feel it beginning to work without delay. She cautiously stretched her muscles testing where her soreness was and stopped when her stomach loudly growled at her.

"Are you 'ungry?" Fleur asked with a smirk at the sound, "I can go grab you some food if you wish?"

Hermione nodded, slightly embarrassed at being fussed over, "Thank you Fleur. I'm starved."

Fleur smiled, patted Hermione's leg lightly and went to grab some food. Hermione looked at Harry and saw he was still sleeping.

"Any updates?" she asked, her eyes never leaving his face.

Mrs. Weasley put a comforting hand on her shoulder and shook her head, "Nothing yet I'm afraid. He's been asleep all night. The healer should be in a little later to check on him."

She gave Hermione's shoulder a little squeeze before going to her chair. Hermione took a look around and saw that not only was Mrs. Weasley and Fleur were there, but George and Ron as well.

"Love the hair, Hermione," George teased with a large smile, "Very chic."

She gave him a mock angry look, "Good morning to you too, you prat."

George chuckled as Ron, the source of the food smell, put his cup down on his food tray, "Ignore him, Hermione. He's just being that way because he's worried," but only a little quieter added, "But he's not wrong about the hair."

"That's enough out of you two," Mrs. Weasley admonished harshly before Hermione could reply herself, "Here my dear," she said handing an overnight bag to Hermione, "Your parents brought you some clothes from your flat late last night while you were asleep. They went home to sleep and said they will be back later."

Hermione thanked her and took the bag form her. She went into the loo and found to her surprise and delight that it was a full bathroom. She decided that she could take the luxury of an extra minute to shower rather than magically try and clean herself. She stripped her dirty and destroyed clothes and started tossing them in a heap on the floor. She decided then and there that they were unsalvageable. She heard a soft clunk when she tossed the remains of her skirt on the dirty pile and bent down to discover the source of the sound. She pulled out the snitch from the pocket and nodded to herself remembering she put it there last night.

She carefully placed the snitch in her bag and carefully unwrapped the bandages covering her burn. She was relieved to see that the burn was almost healed and the new skin was pink and soft. She decided to keep the bandage off while she showered. She turned on the shower, stepped in, and immediately relished the feel of the hot water on her still sore body. She quickly showered, sadly wishing she could just let the hot water wash over her for even longer and dried herself. After she dressed in a simple button-up top and jeans, she pulled her hair up into a ponytail and walked back into Harry's room. Fleur had returned with her food and transfigured her cot into a small table with two chairs, with Fleur sitting in one.

Hermione took a quick look at Harry before sitting down and ravenously devouring her food. She ate in silence and was swallowing her last mouthful of bacon when Bill Weasley entered the room. He was carrying a small bundle and had started talking to his mother as the door closed behind him.

"I'm back, Mum, and you won't…," he smiled when he saw Hermione, "Ahhh... you're awake! Good."

He looked at Harry for a brief moment before sitting on the seat Fleur had quickly vacated for her husband.

"I'm glad you're awake so I can tell you in person," he said and shifted to allow Fleur to sit on his lap, "I just got back from the Forest of Dean."

The cup of coffee was paused halfway to Hermione's lips when Bill mention where he had come from. She gave him a worried look, "Bad?"

Bill's eyebrows raised up in half-amazement/half-trepidation, "Honestly, Hermione" he paused, "It's pretty bad. If I didn't know it was just you and Harry fighting… I swear an army of wizards had been fighting there. The place was practically destroyed."

Hermione's eyes closed and her shoulders slumped in disappointed resignation, "Merlin, I'm sorry…," she whispered.

Bill gave her a small reassuring smile, "Don't be sorry too much though Hermione," he said trying to bolster her, "No muggles witnessed your fight and Mother Nature can recover easily enough. We cleaned up Harry's campsite and removed the wards and protections he placed. So it's as if a strong storm had blown through as opposed to a magical battle. At least that's what Dad and I told the forest workers anyways."

Hermione nodded and gave him a warm smile of thanks, "Thank you. Sorry for causing you so much trouble."

He scoffed at that, "No troubles Hermione," he then had a more serious tone in his voice, "But Dad asked me to say to you that you were very lucky no one saw you. We found a couple of muggle families camping about half a kilometer away while we were there. Thankfully they were all hiking in a different part of the forest at the time."

Hermione nodded again in disappointment at his mild admonishment of her and Harry's behavior.

Bill held up a hand, "Oh before I forget," he said quickly and handed over the bundle to Hermione, "Your cloak. It has a tear or two, but otherwise, it's in great shape. I'm sure Madam Malkin could have that fixed in no time."

Hermione opened her dark blue cloak and took a quick look at it, "Thank you, Bill."

"Wait," George asked in surprise, "You fought Harry?"

Hermione nodded and took a deep breath and related the events from yesterday. They sat in amazement as she recounted the epic duel, Harry's mother's ghost, and Harry surviving the killing curse yet again.

George let out a whistle at the last part, "Harry's blessed, to say the least," he shook his head in wonder, "I'm not betting though if he can survive another go around with that curse though."

Hermione silently agreed.

Ron was speechless after Hermione was done. Like everyone else, he had never in a million years though Harry would ever fight Hermione on anything. To hear that his best mate was begging her to end him was incomprehensible to him. He looked at Harry and shook his head sadly. He felt suddenly guilty for not helping Harry sooner.

His thoughts were interrupted when Healer Thurston entered the room. The healer was a little taken aback by the number of people in the room, but when he saw that the room had been magically expanded, he shrugged his shoulders and accepted the situation. He looked at the far side and saw Hermione awake and sipping her coffee.

"Ah, Miss. Granger. Excellent, you're awake." He quickly made is way over and quickly examined her and her arm, "You drank the potion I gave you?" at her nod he continued, "Excellent. You appear to be in decent health. The burn is healing nicely, and as I said yesterday we'll keep the bandage off. I'd say you won't need any more treatments unless you do something inadvisable," he looked over his glasses at her with an expectant look.

Hermione smirked at his comment and shook her head at him, "Good!" he said, "Now your magical core is still recovering from the efforts of yesterday. Try and rest as much as you can today and you should be fine in a couple of days."

He then turned and spent several minutes examining Harry. The auto-quill at his elbow furiously writing down everything the healer found. Hermione, and the others, waiting on pins and needles for him to finish so they could get some news. After about ten minutes, the auto-quill finished writing with a slight flourish before it and the writing pad disappeared into Thurston's large hip pocket.

He turned to Hermione, and before anyone could ask, started speaking, "Now Mr. Potter's condition is still serious, but I'm a lot more hopeful that he will recover," there was a collective sigh of relief from everyone the room except for Hermione. She sat rock still with her breath still held, biting her lower lip nervously, and never taking her eyes off Harry.

Thurston continued, "His magical core is still severely depleted, but better than it was late yesterday. However, the main concern is that the residual effects of the killing curse still seem to nag his system. I'm not entirely sure how to best treat this as I've never treated anyone who's survived it, but we are doing our best there."

He paused and looked down at his patient, "Now as far as his mental state," his voice turned grave, "I'm afraid that's a far more serious issue. While his body is healing itself, I almost sense his mind isn't really behind it. So we will have wait until he wakes to fully assess where he is hurt emotionally."

"'ealer, any idea when 'arry will awake?" Fleur asked concern showing in her face.

Thurston's face scrunched in thought but shook his head with a bit of frustration in his expression, "I'm not sure and I'm sorry for not having a better answer," he regarded Harry, "We're at Mr. Potter's discretion on that, but it's best to be prepared when he does."

He turned to the group and looked around at them, "Does he have any family living?"

"No," Hermione answered sadly before anyone could, "The closest thing to family he has are The Weasley's," she indicated the others, "They've loved him since the day he met them getting on the Hogwarts Express."

Thurston looked around the room and saw Mrs. Weasley proudly smiling and nodding to him. He thought for a moment, "That's an excellent start and you all seem very protective and caring of him," he said and again receiving nods all around. He looked at Mrs. Weasley, "Girlfriend or wife?"

Mrs. Weasley gave him a soft smile and tilted her head to indicate Hermione, "Our Hermione here is as close to either of those as you can get."

Thurston looked at Hermione and nodded solemnly, "Understood," he took a quick breath, "Well, I'll hopefully have more information later when I check in on him. For now, please feel free to stay and think positive thoughts."

He left the room leaving a silent and contemplative group behind him, and one woman nervously biting her lower lip.

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It was much later in the afternoon before Hermione was alone with Harry. The next wave of the Weasley's had arrived and they and her parents left to get some dinner, so Hermione took the opportunity to stay behind. She had been getting somewhat impatient not being able to have some alone time with Harry. She was worried and was trying not to let it show with everyone. There had been no change in Harry's condition aside from the fact that he was magically getting stronger and his body was recovering from the malnourishment and injuries from the duel. However, he still wasn't responding to anyone around him and was still asleep. Her parents, using their medical background, thought that he might be in a coma and would awake when he was ready.

Now with everyone gone and the room empty aside from just her and Harry. She moved from her chair to sit on the edge of his bed. She brushed the hair from his forehead and smiled down at him.

"You're worrying me, Mr. Potter," she said softly to him, "I thought we agreed in our fourth year not to do that with each other?"

She reached out and held his left hand in both of hers. She felt the warmth and the roughness of his hands.

"You know it's funny really," she said, "You would think me sitting in a hospital with you should almost be old hat for me by now," she smiled, "But I've always been worried. Even in our first year, but," she bit her lower lip and gave him an impish look, "I'll let you in on a little secret. Ron was even sworn to secrecy with this on pain of a bat bogey hex from Ginny, so this is quite serious."

She leaned a little closer to him and lowered her voice, "I told off McGonagall after you fought Quirrell in our first year and were unconscious for three days. Well, she wanted me to go to class and I told her off and said I wasn't leaving your side until you were better," she softly chuckled, "Oh Harry, you should have seen her face. It was beet red and she was sputtering she was so angry with me. But Dumbledore stepped in and we compromised that I could be there anytime I wasn't in class and that I could stay past curfew or overnight with you if I felt like it."

She rolled her eyes, "Shocking and a bit hypocritical to huh?" she squeezed his hand, "Me, the bushy-haired bossy bookworm who once told you that we could have been killed or worse expelled for entering the third-floor corridor and I end up almost getting expelled for yelling at a teacher because I wanted to be with you!"

She smiled and laughed, "But it was one of the best things I've ever done. I showed myself, and others, that I was willing to fight to be with you," she looked down and fidgeted nervously with the blanket, "You were my first real friend and have been my best friend since our first year. I have shared with you things about me my mother doesn't even know. Honestly, if I had been told when I turned 11 that I would meet a boy that would complete me on a train to magical school, I would have told them off saying that no boy would ever be interested in my brainy mind and big teeth. Then I found you and you were interested in me and accepted me without hesitation."

She paused to compose herself, "I hope that you understand that I did what I did yesterday because I love you. And I don't mean I love you like a brother or love you as a best friend. But I love you as the other half of my soul. I think in our fourth year is when I really, I realized that and was afraid for so many years to lose the friendship to try making something more of it. I regret that" she smiled wryly at him, "I remember I once called you an idiot, well I should have said that about myself."

She shrugged her shoulders, "Then you left and it devastated me. I didn't realize just how big a part of me you were until you were gone. Then by some luck, we have found each other again. I will be very blunt Mr. Potter, I will not be so easy to be let go this time and you can bet all the gold in your vaults on that."

She leaned over and lovingly kissed his lips for what seemed like a lifetime but was for only a few moments. She pulled away from his face, still leaning over him, and smiled down at him, "I love you, you selfless, honorable and brave git," she looked at him teasingly, sat up and squeezed his hand.

Suddenly she jumped up from the bed in surprise and shouted for the healer. Harry Potter had just squeezed her hand.


	10. Chapter 10 - Awaken

Awaken

It was almost a week after he had squeezed her hand before Harry Potter finally awoke. He felt as if he was awakening from a long hibernation. It was quite an interesting experience to emerge into consciousness again. Almost as if someone was slowly pulling him out of a dark, sound-proof closet.

The first thing he became aware of was the sounds of muffled voices. He tried to understand what they were saying, but couldn't decipher it. The deeper sounding voice was saying something to a higher sounding voice. What could they be talking about? Must have been important though based on how they kept interrupting each other.

His mind then opened more and smelled the unmistakable smell of coffee and… what was that smell… roses? No wait… jasmine? Yes, it was jasmine. Something close to him smelled of jasmine. It was quite pleasant and… wait… what would smell like jasmine?

Then his mind registered that his hand was being held. Not just held, gripped tightly. But what gripped him was soft, warm and his mind liked the sensation. He didn't even mind the tight grip because of the softness of what was touching him.

Then his mind opened his eyes. Slowly at first. The brightness of the light was blinding to him and it hurt. He tried to focus his eyes, but everything was a bit blurry. Wait! He needed his glasses. Where were they? Suddenly a blurry form was in front of his vision. He squinted and tried to bring into focus the blurry face thought the bright light.

Finally, his mind turned on his voice, "Where… where am I?' he croaked.

"Harry!" came the voice from the blurry face. The voice sounded familiar to him and the person was a girl with brown hair.

All the sounds of voices suddenly got louder and spoke. He closed his eyes and tried to focus his mind even more. He felt something slip around his ears and he opened his eyes and found he could see clearly again. The brown haired girl had put his glasses on him and now was looking at him in relief and joy. His mind immediately identified her…

Hermione Granger

Harry's eyes widened for a brief moment in shock and panic. His mind suddenly decided to open completely and sat up quickly in a rush of panic.

"Harry, no," Hermione said imploringly, trying to hold him down by his shoulders, "You're in St. Mungo's. You're okay. Please try and relax."

Harry looked at saw a room full of Weasley's and he shook his head, "I need to go."

But another pair of hands, this time from Ron Weasley, joined Hermione's hands on him and helped hold him down, "No mate. You're not going anywhere."

Harry shook his head and was about to speak when Hermione took his face in her hands and turned him to look at her. He stopped struggling for a moment and looked into her face. He saw her sadness. His best friend was looking sad and… disappointed? He sat still while he took her face in.

"Harry, it is okay," she said softly, "There's no reason to leave again."

Then his mind remembered something that had happened to him after his duel with Hermione. The memory of what happened forced him to not run, even though his mind screamed for him to leave. So he willed himself to relax and stay where he was. This was not easy for him.

Hermione sensed and felt him relax in the bed. She slowly released him and gave a quick nod to Ron. Ron slowly nodded and let Harry go and stood next to the bed. Everyone patiently waited to see what Harry would do next.

Harry looked around at everyone. Molly, Luna, Ron, and Hermione's parents were gathered around his bed. Another person Harry didn't recognize stepped next to him and held out a wand at Harry.

"Welcome back, Mr. Potter," the tenor voice said with some relief in his voice as he scanned Harry, "I'm Healer Thurston. I need to ask you a few questions if that's okay?"

Harry just nodded blankly.

"Do you know your full name?"

"Har… Harry James Potter."

"Do you know who the Minister of Magic is?"

"Kingsley Shacklebolt, I think."

"Excellent. Do you know what today is?"

Harry thought for a second, then shook his head, "No. Sorry."

"That's okay," the voice said reassuringly, "Can you name everyone you recognize?"

Harry nodded and pointed to Ron first, "Ron, Luna, Mrs. Weasley, Mr. Granger, Mrs. Granger," he paused a moment when he looked again at Hermione, "'Mione."

She smiled at his use of her shortened name.

"Good," the healer said with more cheer, "What was the last thing you remember?"

Harry's mind tried to remember, "I was in a forest and," he looked at Hermione again and saw a tear roll down her cheek, "I was thanking you. Then I blacked out or something."

"Or something," the healer echoed. He took a deep breath, "Mr. Potter, you are recovering from surviving the killing curse for the third time in your life."

Harry's mind struggled with that, "Survived again?"

The healer nodded, "Yes. You've been in a coma-like state for over a week now."

Harry's mind was still trying to piece together what that meant. It was no wonder he felt off if he'd been out like that for a whole week. He ran his hands through his hair and noticed it had been cut short again. He quickly grabbed his chin and felt his smooth skin; his beard was gone.

"You're going to feel a little disoriented for a while, Mr. Potter," the healer said, putting his wand away and looking at the auto-quill writing on a floating pad of paper, "So please do not stress yourself out if you don't immediately recognize something or you cannot remember something. It's possible you will just need a few more moments before it clicks in. Also, you have plenty of people around you that would be willing to help fill in some of those gaps," the healer looked at Harry, "Any questions?"

"Can I leave now?"

The healer flashed Hermione a look before shaking his head, "No, I'm sorry but you have to stay here for a few days until you're recovered. I still would like to run a test or two more now that you're awake, but I can do that later."

Harry's shoulders slumped when he was told he couldn't leave. He tried to calm himself as he tried to remember what he'd been told.

Seeing that Harry was trying to come to grips with something, the healer decided that he should come back later, "I'll be back a bit later then," the healer said and quietly left the room.

"Welcome back Harry," Mrs. Weasley said in joyful relief, "We were afraid we might lose you."

Harry flashed a look at Hermione before replying, "Um… yeah… thanks," he replied not exactly in a pleasant tone.

An uncomfortable silence fell on the room. Mr. Granger made the first move when he lightly grabbed his wife at her elbow and gave her a gentle tug, "Why don't we get some food for you Harry. You must be famished."

He gave everyone a look and they understood, "Yeah, mate. The food's not too bad here," Ron said with a chuckle, "We'll be back soon."

He followed Luna and Mrs. Weasley out of the room. Harry watched them go and then it was only him and Hermione left. There was a long moment of silence between them. Neither knew how to start.

Hermione made the first move, "It's good you're back."

He saw her smile, but shrugged his shoulders, "It's not like I really had any choice," he said with no joy in his voice.

He saw hurt in her eyes at his comment and was remorseful for it, but he couldn't bring himself to apologize to her. He knew it wasn't her fault. She had done what he had begged her to do. But he was angry because he didn't want to be here and now that he was he wanted to be alone.

A flash of anger crossed her face, "You're a bloody arse, you know that?" she fumed at him, "After what you pleaded for me to do and I did it… you sit there and… and…," she sputtered trying to find the words.

"You didn't do a go enough job then, did you?" he interrupted, his voice dripping with resentment. He knew immediately it was the wrong thing to say.

_**SLAP!**_

Harry's head suddenly spun to his right and his face burst with stinging pain. He felt his glasses fly off his face and heard them land somewhere on the floor with a loud clatter. He slowly turned back to her and saw her face flushed with anger and turned to stone. Her hand was starting to turn red from the impact against his face, but she didn't even register the pain in her hand and wrist.

With barely contained rage and in a soft angry whisper, Hermione's eyes bore into him, "How dare you… how dare you say that to me!"

She leaned forward menacingly, "You begged me. You begged me to something I didn't want to do!"

He sat back in his bed, suddenly and genuinely afraid of her. His fear showing in his eyes.

She ignored his fear. Her anger negated any sympathy she felt for him, "But I did it didn't I?" she continued in the quiet fury filled voice, "I did it! Because I saw how much pain you were in Harry. I saw it! And it hurt me to see you in that much pain."

She looked at him in angry hurt, "Do you know what it's like to be asked to end the life of someone you love? Do you?!" she practically spat out.

He shook his head. The closest he came was when Dumbledore asked him to not interfere with Draco and Snape in the Astronomy Tower, but he'd never had some ask him to do what he had asked of her.

"No. You. Don't." she angrily hissed every word. She pointed at him, "You have no idea what it's like to have the one person you love more than anything in this world beg you to do that," her voice lowered and got softer and if possible even angrier, "And you have no idea what it's like to actually do it. So, don't you ever say something like that to me again after what I've done for you."

There was a moment of silence between them and Harry looked into Hermione's rage filled eyes.

Slowly she stood and grabbed her cloak, "I can't stand to look at you right now. Goodbye Harry and you're welcome."

With not so much of a sound she fled the room. Harry just laid back in his bed, frightened and panicked for what had happened and unsure what to do.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Emma Granger was just about to sip her tea when a dark blue blur suddenly flew past where everyone was sitting. If it wasn't for the age-old ability of a mother to recognize their children, she would have never been able to register the blue blur was her daughter. She quickly put her cup down and raced off after her to the shocked and confused looks of everyone with her. It took Emma a few moments of running to even get close to her daughter.

"Hermione, what happened?!" Emma said after she had caught up with her daughter.

Hermione never slowed in her walk, "I'm leaving, Mum."

"Whoa, whoa, wait there young lady," her mother grabbed her and dragged her to a halt. Hermione's cape, which had been billowing out as she walked, wrapped itself around Hermione. Emma was surprised when she saw her daughter's flushed face.

"What happened?" she asked, knowing immediately that it must not have gone well.

Hermione's eyes flashed with anger again, "I don't want to talk about it."

Hermione made to leave, but Emma stepped in front of her, "Nope, not this time. You used to do this when you were little, but I'm not going to stand for it now. You need to talk to me."

She took Hermione's elbow and dragged her into an empty room.

She placed herself between Hermione and the door and looked at her daughter expectantly, "Okay, so tell me."

Hermione sighed and told her mother what happened. She ended her brief recount by throwing her hands up in disbelief, "And I hit him, Mum! I hit Harry!"

"Sounded like he deserved it," her mother replied with an even tone.

"Mum, I have never hit Harry before in my life," she said looking at her mother in surprise, "No matter what he's said or done, I've never raised my hand to him."

"Well this time is different," her mother said.

"Oh really? Do you encourage people to hit those you just woke from comas?"

Emma shook her head, "No, you misunderstand. Do you think he believes you tricked him?"

"Tricked him?" Hermione looked at her mother in disbelief, "Mum… he heard me speak the incantation. He knows the spell I used. There's no way to trick a person out of the killing spell."

Emma regarded her daughter thoughtfully, "If he knows what you did, then why is he bitter about being alive?"

"I don't know," Hermione resignedly whispered, "I didn't ask. I just know that it hurt me so much when he said that. I am so angry at him."

Emma stepped forward and embraced her daughter, "I'm sure it did," she released her and looked at Hermione, "And I'm not trying to minimize what he said or defend him. I think there just might be something else there."

Hermione nodded, "You're probably right. But I can't be with him right now after what happened. I just need some time away from him."

Emma nodded understanding. She gave a soft laugh, "You know, after 35 years of marriage your father still has that effect with me sometimes. That's why your aunt still has that spare room with the daybed."

The corners of Hermione's mouth quirked upwards and she nodded.

Emma rubbed her daughters arms comfortingly, "Now go on. Clear your head and your anger," she held a hand up to her daughter to interrupt the obvious question that was about to be asked, "And yes, I'll make sure he doesn't run away again," she lowered her voice and muttered, "After I have a few choice words with him too."

Hermione gave her mother a quick hug of thanks and left.

Emma sighed heavily and shook her head.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was over two weeks later before Hermione was even able to be in the same room with Harry. It had been a very trying time for Hermione. While she loved Harry more than anything, she was still getting over their argument and her feelings about what had happened. Every time she wanted to be with him, her anger flared up again at what he said and she didn't go. But she constantly asked how he was doing.

Her mother was true to her word and Harry had not run away in that time. She knew her mother had laid into Harry after she'd left. Her father had been sworn to secrecy about what had been said to Harry, but he did confirm that Emma had spoken her peace. Harry apparently was chastised enough to apologize to them and readily accept the counseling that was offered by St. Mungo's. He even promised both mothers, as Mrs. Weasley had been there too, that he wouldn't try and run away again. And Harry always kept his promises.

He had spent a few more days at St. Mungo's before going back to The Burrow. She knew he was asking about her as well, which she was very happy to know. Once he had been back at The Burrow for a week, she had shown up at a little welcome home party. She stayed in the background while the Weasley's and a few others welcomed him home. She saw he seemed more than a little uncomfortable with the attention, which was normal for Harry anyways, but Hermione saw that there was something even deeper behind his uncomfortableness.

It was then, during the party, that Hermione started to think that there was something to what her mother had mentioned when she was storming out of the hospital after their argument. While she was still angry with him, she was curious to know if her mother was right. He did see her that day and looked a bit fearful at her. She gave him a small smile and nod before disappearing into the kitchen to help Mrs. Weasley. He made no efforts to try and talk with her that day and she still avoided him.

But she was sad. It hurt her not to be with him. What should have been a happy occasion for her too, was bittersweet. She did cry when she got home later that night. She didn't want this to go on too much longer, but she knew she needed time too.

Finally, two weeks after the welcome home party, there came a knock at her door. She curiously looked at the door before getting up from her desk and opening it. She was surprised at the sight of Luna standing there.

"Luna?" Hermione said in surprise, "Come in!"

Luna smiled and entered and followed Hermione into the study.

"Can I get you tea or anything?" Hermione asked as she sat down on the couch.

Luna shook her head and joined her, "No thank you, Hermione. I cannot stay long. I'm running an errand for my father so he can finish this month's _Quibbler_."

Hermione looked a little disappointed, but nodded, "Anything exciting?'

"Not really. Just need to pick-up a delivery of some printing supplies in Diagon Alley," Luna shrugged her shoulders. She fished in her cloak and held out an envelope to Hermione, "I swung by The Burrow before I came and I was asked to give this to you while I was out."

Hermione took the envelope and immediately recognized Harry's handwriting on the outside, "Thank you."

Luna gave her friend a meaningful look, "I think it's time for you two to talk again."

Luna's patented bluntness was in full force today Hermione noted, and nodded at her friend, "Is he okay?"

Luna contemplated her answer for a moment and noticed Hermione had not opened the letter, "He's come a long way with the counselor. They talk every day and he seems to be getting better. He's started opening up to us now. I think it's because there are fewer Wrackspurts around him now. But…," she trailed off as she looked at Hermione, "He misses you."

Hermione dropped her head and nodded, but didn't say anything.

Luna stood, knowing that there was little more she could do on that topic, "I have to run now that I'm done my mail duties."

Hermione smiled in thanks, "Thank you for dropping this off."

"You're welcome," Luna said as she opened the door, "Oh, you are still willing to babysit for us Thursday?"

Hermione nodded, her smile brightening, "Of course!"

Luna nodded, "Excellent. See you later!"

Hermione closed the door after Luna apparated off her doorstep. She walked back into the study and sat by the fire in one of Sirius's favorite chairs. She held up the letter, taking in that he only wrote "_'Mione_" on the front. She was a little nervous to open it and noticed her hands were shaking a little. She took a deep breath, broke the seal, pulled the letter out and began to read.


	11. Chapter 11 - Do You Love Me?

Chapter 11 - Do You Love Me?

_'Mione,_

_I know how hard it is to say you're sorry to someone, but how much harder it is to figure out a way to start. So I'll crack to it._

_I am sorry for what I said. You were right. Every word. Your words stung me more than your slap and have been in my thoughts since. You did not deserve what I said, but I certainly deserved your reaction. You're right that what I asked you to do was not something I can really relate to. I don't really know what to say to help ease your mind that I really wish I could take back what I said that day. I do not expect for you to forgive me for saying what I said. I can only hope that I can try and heal the chasm that has formed because of my actions. You deserve nothing less and I am willing to try._

_I have been trying to express to the counselor why I disappeared. The counselor said that my reactions were entirely normal for a person who experienced as much trauma as I had experienced but also helped me realize that I always had a support system to help me during those times. Ron, The Weasley's, Sirius, Remus, but most especially… you. But after the last battle and I was alone in my old room, I did not do the one thing I should have done… trust in you to help me. I told the counselor that I should have gone to you and instead I panicked and decided to leave. I never realized that what I did would hurt anyone, especially the one person I care about more than anything in this world… you. It was in that session that we spoke about my day of disappearance that I realized that you were not there to listen to me say that and I felt suddenly alone. It seems that even while I was alone for the last 14 years, I always had you there with me inside, except for that moment. I think I can somewhat understand what you must have felt for all these years._

_There is more, about what happened after I died, but I would like to tell you the rest in person. I haven't spoken of it to anyone, even the counselor, but I think it might help us. I hope that you might be willing to meet with me. Any place you choose._

_I'll understand if you don't want to._

_For what it matters… I do miss you._

_Harry_

Hermione wiped the tears that had rolled down her cheeks after reading the letter. It was a heartfelt and honest letter. She looked into the fire thinking for a long time. Of course, she would meet with him. That was never in doubt, only the when. She re-read the letter again and was heartened to hear that he had made some progress with the counselor. The letter clearly reflected that help.

She reread the line about something that happened after he died. Her face twisted in a questioning look at the parchment she held. Could that be the missing piece? Could that explain why he was so uncomfortable after he just woke up and during the party? Possibly.

She stood and went to her desk. She looked at his letter briefly once more before taking out paper and an envelope. She wrote a quick reply and when she was finished, she began folding the letter.

"Kreacher?"

With a soft crack, the old house elf appeared by the side of her desk, "You called my mistress?" he asked in his usual slow, deep voice.

She sealed the envelope, wrote Harry's name on the front, and handed it to him, "Can you please get this over to The Burrow and give it to Harry?"

The elf took the letter and blinked in surprise, "Master Harry is there, Mistress?"

Hermione mentally kicked herself for not telling the elf Harry had returned. As Harry was the owner of Grimmauld Place, Hermione only being really a long-term guest, Harry should have come back here. However, it had been better for him to go with The Weasley's. Regardless, Hermione had forgotten to mention it to Kreacher so he could look after his master as was his duty.

"I'm sorry for not telling you Kreacher. That's my fault. He recovers from his journey there," she quickly continued to avoid any further comments from the elf, "If you can do this right away and please wait for a reply before returning that would be appreciated."

"Kreacher will do it right away, Mistress."

And with that and a soft crack, he was gone. Hermione sat back in her chair and sighed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Two days later found Hermione anxiously pacing in the study at Grimmauld Place. Harry had agreed to the meeting place and date in his response and she had been getting increasingly more anxious and nervous as the time approached. In fact, she had barely slept the night before. She had tossed and turned and finally gave up and read a book until four in the morning.

She stopped in front of the mirror and checked her appearance for the umpteenth time. Her clothes were just fine. Her make-up wasn't smudged. And her hair was tied up and out of the way. A chime sounded from the old grandfather clock in the room and Hermione stopped her pacing and took a deep breath as it signaled the time Harry was to arrive.

"Ok. Calm down. Relax."

A moment later, Harry Potter returned to his house with a soft pop. There was silence between the two as Harry and Hermione standing in the middle of the study looked at each other.

Hermione immediately saw that he had filled out somewhat and seemed to be well on his way to recovering his lost weight. His clothes seemed to be too new to be borrowed from Ron. And his glasses were fixed, they broke when the impacted against the hospital room wall after she had slapped him. But what Hermione noticed more was his emerald eyes had regained some life that she didn't see when the fought. Where they had been filled with pain and agony… now were filled with sadness and a bit of fear.

What she did not know, but probably could have guessed if she tried, was that he was just as nervous as she was. After the slap, Harry didn't know how he would be able to be around her or how to act. Once he sent the letter, he half-hoped that she'd say no to meet him so he could relax a bit. But now he was here in front of her wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans.

"Hi," he said nervously.

"Hi," she replied, with a sudden steadiness in her voice that surprised her.

Tension filled the silent room to an almost unbearable level.

"Harry, I'm…" Hermione said and the exact same moment as Harry said, "'Mione, I'm so…."

They stopped talking and then burst out laughing at each other. The tension in the room broke immediately at their laughter. They both then sat down on the couch, at the far ends, with half the couch open space between them.

Harry wiped his hands again and spoke first, "'Mione, I'm so sorry about what I said. I had no right and you did nothing to deserve it."

Hermione gave him a soft smile, "Thank you, Harry. I know that. But you need to know that you hurt me," she tapped her heart, "Here."

His face dropped to sadness and his voice reflected it, "I know. That is something I can't forgive myself for doing and I certainly understand if you don't accept my apology."

She gave him a look of derision, "Harry, of course, I accept your apology. You've worked hard since that day to come to terms with what happened and what you did. If you hadn't then we wouldn't be sitting here right now."

He nodded, "I am trying, 'Mione. I am," he said emphatically.

She broke the empty space between them and gave his hand a comforting squeeze, "I know you are and I see it."

He nodded again before looking at her, "I also need to say how sorry I am for asking you to do what you did."

She sat back, a little shocked by this. She had guessed he might say something like this, but not so soon.

"I was in pain, but I was trying to run away from my problems," he shook his head and she saw he was angry with himself, "I should have come to you. Talked to you. I have relied on your logical and smart brain for years. For me to abandon my best friend like that is unforgivable. I'm sorry for not coming to you."

She shook her head after a moment's pause, "No, Harry. For this, I cannot accept your apology."

His face filled with fear then sadness. He nodded, his head dropping down in shame.

"I'm not accepting your apology for the running away part," she clarified. She sat up straighter and looked at him intently, "You should never apologize for being the most selfless person I have ever known. I certainly did not expect you to come to me with every single problem you had. You did what you thought was right at the time and you were trying to protect us."

"But I hurt you," he whispered.

"Yes, you did," she said, "And for that, I'll accept your apology, but not for being the good person I know you are."

They were silent for a few moments before Harry spoke, "But when I begged you…"

She held up her hand to stop him, "We've been down that path already. You asked. I saw the pain and knew there was no other way. And I did it."

He closed his eyes and she saw a tear fall, "I should never have asked you," he said in a ragged whisper.

She looked away and back again, "Yes, you should have."

He looked at her in utter shock at her answer.

"Look… who else would you have asked?" she paused, "Only someone you really trusted."

He nodded, "But…."

"No 'buts', Harry," she said. Her voice then got a touch of anger, "However that was not something I was expecting from you."

He nodded, still avoiding her gaze.

"You were right though. Had I had that experience I might not have asked you to do it, knowing what it would feel like for you," he took a deep breath, "I'm sorry about that. So, so sorry for saying you failed me. You have never failed me once. Even during our second year and you were petrified. You still were there to help me."

"Well you were the one being an idiot and not noticing a scrap of paper in my hand for days," she said, her tone becoming teasing.

He gave her a small smile and nod, "Ron was an idiot too for that matter, not noticing."

"Maybe, but Ron's always been a bit more a prat than you," she chuckled and got a quick snort of laughter from him.

They sat in silence.

"Harry," Hermione spoke softly, "Of course I accept your apology for what you said and did. You honestly think I wouldn't forgive my best friend, especially when he's trying to be a better person?"

He shrugged his shoulders. She scooted up to him and took his face in her hands and turned his face to hers.

"I forgive you," she said with a loving smile, "Now please try and forgive yourself."

He nodded and then broke down crying. She quickly wrapped her arms around him and held him as his body was wracked with his sobs. Where not too long ago her mother had done this for her after she saw him for the first time in 14 years, it was now her turn to do this for him. She then started crying with him as they both finally were able to realize they can put the past behind them and move on with their lives. She held him for a long while until he was exhausted from the effort.

He pulled away, wiping his eyes. She did too, then touched his arm.

"Don't apologize for crying, Harry," she said quickly and lightly, beating him to the punch.

He let out a quick laugh because she knew he was going to apologize for that and nodded, "Thanks."

"There is something else I wanted to tell you about," he said, "About what happened after you… I…."

"It's okay. You don't have to say it," she nodded in understanding, "You mentioned it in your letter. Does it have to do with why you haven't run off?"

"That's my 'Mione," he smiled, "I knew you'd probably have thought of something before I told you," she grinned at his comment.

He looked at her and nodded, "Yes, to answer your question. After… I died… I wound up in Godric's Hollow," he suddenly perked up, "Wait a second… I'll be right back. I need to get something that will help."

Hermione watched in confusion as he dashed from the room calling out for Kreacher. Less than five minutes later, he came back into the room holding a silver basin with runes carved along the edges.

"A pensive, Harry?"

He nodded, "Sirius told me once that he had found one his family had owned for generations when he was cleaning this place. I figured Kreacher might know where he put it," with a wave of his wand, he levitated it in the center of the room, "I remembered and thought it might be easier to show you my memory."

"Good idea Harry," she said and went to stand by him.

He placed his wand to his temple, "I hope this works," he said.

He pulled away a silvery strand from his head and dipped the tip into the shadowy liquid that had appeared when Harry activated the device.

He held out his hand and without hesitation she took it.

"Ready?' he asked.

She nodded and they both placed their faces into the cool substance. Hermione immediately felt the tug and the sensation of falling before suddenly finding herself in a graveyard.

She took a moment to get her bearings. Her eyes widened, "Harry, is this…?"

Harry, still clutching her hand, just nodded. Hermione looked around the silent graveyard and gasped when she saw they stood next to his parent's tombstones.

"Hello?"

She turned around and saw a haggard and worn out Harry standing in the graveyard in front of his parent's graves.

"Hello?" he called out again, looking around.

"Hello, son."

Hermione put her hand to her mouth in surprise. Harry's mother, father, Sirius, and Remus all appeared in front of them. Harry turned from looking at the tombstone to see his mother stepping forward from the group that came to see him.

"Where am I?" haggard Harry asked his mother, "Are you bringing me with you?"

Lily shook her head sadly, "Not quite my son."

Harry staggered to her and in a pained moan asked, "Why not? Why can't I come and be with you?"

She smiled in sadness at her son, "It's not yet time, my brave boy."

"Not time? Mum, I can't take it anymore!" Harry gasped, his eyes wide in agony, "Too many deaths. Too much pain."

Harry's father stepped forward, his face and voice filled with sorrow, "I'm sorry, son. It's not yet your time."

"Why not!" Harry asked turning on him in fury, "It's not been my time three times now! And each time I returned more and more people died and I caused more suffering for those who lived," beseeching his father for an answer, "Do you think I want that? Do you think I want to live with that?"

James shook his head sorrowfully, "No, of course not son."

Harry looked between the four standing in front of him, "Then why can't I come home?" he pleaded, "Why can't I come with you?"

Sirius stepped forward, "Harry, we know that you did not want what was thrust upon you, but you need to understand that there was no other choice but you to bear this burden."

"Me?!" he shouted hotly, "I heard the bloody prophesy. It could have been Neville. Why not him? Why didn't Neville get this curse?"

"Because Harry, my boy, you would have never forgiven yourself if he had," came the grandfatherly tone from next him.

Hermione gasped again at the sight of Dumbledore, smiling sweetly at the young man in front of him.

Harry whirred on him, "Forgave him? He could have taken it! Neville's strong. He could have done it!" Harry shouted at his mentor, "Then I could have been normal… just plain Harry."

Dumbledore's warm smile never left his lips, "Ah, but Harry, Neville lacks the one quality which you have in abundance…," he leaned forward with emphasis, "Love."

Harry looked at his mentor as if Dumbledore had blast-ended skrewts coming out his ears, "Love?" he snorted contemptuously, "Love? Ha! What's love gotten me? Huh?"

He turned to the four ghosts next to him, "I'll tell you what love's gotten me," he pointed at his parents, Sirius, and Remus, "Dead parents," he pointed at Dumbledore, "Then you, Fred Weasley, Lavender Brown, Snape, and more people I can't even count… dead!" Harry eyes widened in recollection and quickly looked around to Remus, "Your wife died because of me!"

Remus looked down sorrowfully and then back up at Harry, "Yes she did, but she does not regret for one moment what happened," he replied in that even light tone he always had. He gave Harry his small smile, "All of us did it because we loved you."

He quickly stood in front of Remus, "I didn't want you to."

"I know," Remus said softly, putting a comforting hand on Harry's shoulder, "But that wasn't your choice."

"But it's my choice to go with you now right?" he turned back to Dumbledore imploringly, "You said that when we talked last time."

Dumbledore's face remained calm when he replied, "Harry, the choice is and always has been yours. However, you must understand Harry that there are other responsibilities, other people who still need you."

Sirius stepped next to Remus and said earnestly to his godson, "You're not needed here, Harry. Not yet."

Harry went to stand in front of his mother, face filled with anxiety, "There's nothing left for me there now. Don't you understand… I've got nothing left!"

Harry sobbed and fell heavily to his knees before them. He was sobbing deeply, head down in despair. The ghosts just stood with him and watch in pained silence.

"I just want to be with you again," he sobbed, "I'm so tired of running. I just want to go home."

Hermione gripped her Harry's hand tight at the scene in front of her. She never turned to look at him as she was riveted to the scene in front of her, but she felt him return her grip and remain silent.

Harry's mother stepped forward and kneeled in front of him, "My son, there are people you've left behind that still love you and need you."

"But so many more have gone," Harry whispered through his anguish.

"Yes, but we are always with you," she said with a smile putting her hand over his heart, "Here."

"But there are others," she continued, "One in particular needs you, Harry. And for that one, you need to go back."

Harry looked up at his mother, "What if I don't want too? What if… what if I can't?"

"Then she takes on the pain you gave up and will lead a life full of misery deeper than you feel at this moment," Lily said, "For not only will she take your pain, she will have the added extra pain of not having you to support her. She will live a life unfulfilled and die in misery. Never again to look upon those she loves, even in death," she looked at her son with a pained look, "Are you willing to leave someone to such pain and misery if you could prevent it?"

Harry was unmoved, "She's strong. She'll get through it."

James shook his head and then said adamantly, "Harry, without her, the magical world will never move forward. Never be what you fought so hard for it to become."

Harry shook his head and almost mumbled, "One person can't make that much difference for me to go back."

"Oh no son, one person can make the whole difference," James said solemnly kneeling next to Lily, "You were one person and made a huge difference to millions. You gave them hope, and in the end, you gave them love and freedom."

"Your father's right, Harry," Dumbledore agreed, "When you and I spoke after Voldemort destroyed his Horcrux, you could have passed on and been with us. But you choose to go back and help the living. You were that difference, Harry."

"But now you need to help and support her so she can make the same difference," Sirius said, "She needs your help, Harry."

Harry was silent as they spoke. He then looked between his parents, "I asked her to help me end my pain. How can I ask 'Mione to forgive me for that? I asked her to do the unforgivable. Even if I do go back, she won't accept my help after this."

Lily smiled, "I will help you with that. Don't worry, you love each other very much and will work through this," she cupped his face with her hand, "Hermione is a strong and special person to do what she did. She loves you deeply and that's why she did what she did. She was willing to sacrifice her happiness and future so you could be at peace. Only someone who loves another that unconditionally will do that. So, she will forgive you, but you must be willing to be forgiven."

Harry nodded and Lily hugged her son tight and gave him a kiss on the top of his head, "Harry, please listen to me," she looked into his eyes, "You must go back for me, for us, for them, and for her. Please."

Harry took a ragged breath and gripped his mother tight. He closed his eyes and nodded.

"Oh my brave and sweet boy," she whispered, hugging him tight one last time, "I'll see you again. Never fear. I will be here when it is time."

She released Harry and gave him a loving smile, "I love you."

"Love you too," Harry said and then watched his mother disappear.

Harry looked at his father, Sirius, Remus and Dumbledore, "I'll see you again?"

James smiled and hugged his son, "I promise."

Sirius put his hand on Harry's shoulder, "We'll be here when it is time for you to join us."

Harry nodded, "I love you all."

James squeezed his son tighter, "And we love you, my son."

James released Harry and stood. He backed-up and joined the other three standing before Harry. Harry watched as they waved and faded leaving Harry alone in the graveyard.

Harry then looked up and screamed out his agony and pain. The sound was so visceral and primal, that Hermione was immediately reduced to tears. She took a step forward, but Harry stopped her from trying to go to him. The scream lasted for what felt like an eternity. Finally, he stopped and fell onto his back, shattered, spent and unable to move.

With a sudden tug, Hermione was expelled from the memory. She pulled her face from the pensive and looked at Harry. She stood in stunned silence for a few minutes. With a sudden move, she wrapped her arms around him tightly and silently cried on his shoulder. Harry held her to him and didn't speak.

"She came to me after you died," Hermione said in his ear, "She told me to love you. She said you were the other half of me as I was the other half of you."

Harry nodded at her words and still held her tight.

"She wished us to be happy," she said, "I missed you for the last 14 years. I was incomplete without you here with me. I didn't know what to do. But I always knew one thing… I loved you."

She released him, but still held him in her arms. She looked intently into the emerald eyes that have captivated her since she was 12 and asked softly the question she had been waiting to ask for over a decade, "So, do you love me?"


	12. Chapter 12 - Adrift No More

Adrift No More

Harry blinked.

Hermione looked into his eyes and started to feel an overwhelming sense of fear. She felt her stomach drop into her shoes. _"Oh Merlin… he doesn't love me."_

Harry's face was blank with incomprehension. The he saw her face pale with fear, then her cheeks flush with humiliation and embarrassment and then she started biting her lower lip. She pulled away from him and mumbled something he couldn't hear and started to dash out of the room.

"Mione wait!" he grabbed her hand and pulled her back to him. She fought for a quick moment before he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight against him, "I'm sorry for not answering right away," he kissed the top of her head and then looked into her brown eyes, "Of course I love you, 'Mione."

"Not the way I love you," she whispered. Her voice heavy with sadness.

"No," he said, "Not exactly in the same way you love me," he pulled away and looked intently into her eyes, "More."

Hermione blinked.

Her fear and embarrassment turned to something else… wait… was that…? She saw the love in his eyes and that feeling she recognized was realization of getting what you want. She finally, since she was 12, had what she always wanted… Harry.

A tear rolled down her cheek in joy and she felt him wipe it away. He slowly leaned in and she felt his soft warm lip lightly press against hers. Her heart skipped a beat and then started beating faster than she thought possible. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the feeling of their kiss. The softness, the tenderness, the passion… all wrapped into one kiss. At that moment Hermione felt lighter than air and she felt the wave of love for him explode into her kiss. She melted into him and passionately returned his kiss, giving herself into what she was feeling and wanting.

For what seemed like hours, their first kiss seared her lips and soul. She relished the feel of his lips, hands, and body against her. Hermione also knew from this kiss that he did love her with everything he had. She knew that they still had a long road ahead, but she also knew that they would work through it… together.

They finally, and reluctantly, broke the kiss to catch their breaths. They touched their foreheads together and held on tight to each other.

"Wow," Harry gasped.

Hermione let out a laugh at his reaction, "To say the least, Harry," she gave him a mischievous smile, "And it only gets better from here."

She saw him blush at the comprehension of what she had just said, "Umm… well… I…," he stammered.

She laughed and kissed him again, "Harry Potter, embarrassed of a little sex talk?" she smirked, "I think I'm going to enjoy teasing you."

His mouth quirked upwards, "As long as you're willing to get as good as you give," he replied.

They kissed. They broke away, but just stood and held each other for a while. Each unwilling to let the other go.

"I need your help, 'Mione," Harry said, his voice now nervous, "I'm still not quite whole. The counselor said it could take a long time to heal. I hope you're willing to be here and help me. I don't think I can do this without you with me," she felt him tense in anxiety, "Of course I would be willing to help and support you! Don't think that just because…."

She put her finger to his lips and stopped him, "Of course I'll stand by your side and support you through this. We both need to heal and become whole again. It will be a long time before we will be strong again, but I do know this… we will be stronger together than apart."

She kissed him again and felt him relax in her arms.

"You always have the right answer," he said.

She chuckled, "And don't you forget it."

Harry laughed and then looking into her brown eyes, "I love you, Hermione."

Hermione looked into his emerald eyes, "I love you too, Harry."

He nervously dug into his pocket, "There is something I want to give you," he pulled a golden object from his pocket and held it out to her.

She gasped, "The snitch Dumbledore gave you?"

He nodded, "It was the only thing I kept with me when I left," he held it out to her, "Please. I want you to have it."

As if it was made of glass, Hermione gently picked up from his hand. She looked at the first snitch Harry ever caught and saw no marks on it despite the rough years it had experienced with Harry. She was certain Dumbledore probably used some sort of magic on it before he died to preserve it. Then her eyes narrowed as she studied it curiously.

"Harry, there's no writing on it."

He shrugged, "It faded after Voldemort killed me in the forest. I guess it served its purpose. Appearing when I was ready to die and disappearing after I died."

Hermione gently closed her hand around the object and smiled up at Harry, "Thank you."

He gave her an embarrassed look, "I know it's not jewelry or something more special, but I thought…."

She silenced him with a finger to his lips, "No Harry. This is special. More than any piece of jewelry. This was something that meant a lot to you. This was something that brought joy and happiness to you in the past," she looked form the snitch to his eyes, "And you giving it to me is special to me because I can share that joy and happiness with you in the here and now and the future."

He smiled at her, "Thank you, 'Mione. It would have taken me all night to say that. And not nearly as well as you did."

She laughed at him and they kissed once more before Hermione suggested Harry stay for dinner. They enjoyed their first dinner together, laughing about old memories they shared and few they experienced apart. Both felt the years come together a little bit during their dinner as they shared their adventures. They talked also about their future together and how they could work as a team to heal and get stronger. Hermione even mentioned that she had Kreacher keep his room ready in case he came home. Of course, she then added that her old room could be a smaller library just for her if he was willing to share a room. Harry laughed, readily agreed with her plan, and said he couldn't wait to live with her.

As they sat in front of the fire after dinner, Hermione sitting against Harry on the couch with his arms wrapped around her, she smiled and chuckled softly. He stirred and looked at her curiously.

"'Mione?"

She laid back against him, "Oh it's nothing. I just keep forgetting to say something to you since you've been back. Especially since you're going to live with me here…," she turned and looked at him and smiled, "Welcome home, Harry."


	13. Epilogue

"You know… your hair is very unruly."

"Nana," the raven haired young woman rolled her eyes at the old woman, and with feigned annoyance added, "My hair is not unruly because I want it to be. Maybe you and Grampa Harry should have thought about that before you had kids and what a curse you'd be unleashing upon this family."

The old woman laughed at the young witch's retort. At 114 years old, Hermione Potter was still enjoying her life. Although, she has had some sad years the last few years. Most of her friends have passed away. Actually, she was the last of the original group from Hogwarts who fought and defeated Voldemort. But what was worst of all, her husband of 82 years died just a month ago. But the visits by her youngest great-granddaughter were always a source of cheer for her, and Harry when he had been alive, and Hermione always would tease the young witch about whatever she could think of.

Right now she watched the spitting image of Harry self-consciously re-tie her hair into a ponytail at Hermione's comment about how bushy and unruly it was. The young witch's smiling emerald eyes belied the annoyance in her voice. She loved her great-grandmother and looked forward to coming to visit her. Hermione was very proud of her great-granddaughter. Head Girl at Hogwarts, perfect NEWTs, and now was about to start her internship with the Minister of Magic.

"Much better," Hermione teased with a smile on her face as her great-granddaughter was finished with her hair and was looking at her with approval.

Harriet Potter smirked and unfolded a blanket from the bed and placed on Hermione's lap, "There you go," she stood up and looked down at her great-grandmother, "Now I'm going to see about getting you that book from the library downstairs you wanted. Will you be okay until I get back?"

"Oh please," Hermione gave the young witch a derisive look, "I fought Voldemort and your great-grandfather and survived both. I will just fine just sitting in this chair _child_," she said, emphasizing the 'child' part teasingly.

The young witch, still smirking, gave an exaggerated grunt, "Good thing Grampa Harry didn't hear you say that," she said, "He'd chide you about insulting the second brightest witch of her age. Of course, then you'd remind him that you kicked his arse and I'd be able to enjoy hearing you tease each other again."

Hermione was also proud that Harriet gave as well as she got. _"Reminds me a lot of Harry,"_ she thought to herself, _"Stronger than both Harry and I together."_ At the mention of Harry, Hermione smile turned sad. He would have told Hermione off for calling Harriet a child, but he would have enjoyed the teasing as well.

Harriett's smile to turn sad as she realized why her nana's face became saddened, "I'm sorry Nana," she said in sympathy, "I miss him a lot too."

Hermione gave her a nod and smile, "I know," she settled back in her chair, "I miss him terribly," she looked at the wedding photo of her and Harry on her nightstand and smiled, "I can't wait to be with him again."

Harriet just nodded the last comment, "I know Grampa Harry can't wait for you to be with him either," she said with a loving pat on Hermione's arm before quietly leaving the room.

Hermione watched her go and then settled back in her chair and closed her eyes. She felt the silence of the room fill her senses.

"She's right you know," came the all too familiar voice from in front of her.

Hermione's eyes snapped opened in shock and she saw the face of a man she had loved for over 100 years. He was seated on the edge of her bed and looked at her with his emerald eyes full of love for her.

"Harry?" she whispered in shock.

His mouth quirked in a mirror of Harriet's smile a few moments before, "Hi My Love."

She felt her eyes start to tear up at the sight of him, "But… you died?" she said in breathless wonder.

He just nodded. Hermione then saw that he was not the 113 year old man she remembered seeing when she was at his bedside as he looked upon her as his final sight in this world. He was a young man again. He was vibrant and energetic again. As if time had stopped him aging when they got married.

She felt her lower lip tremble, "I've missed you," she choked.

"I've missed you too, 'Mione," he replied with a loving smile.

"But… but how can this be?" she asked still in shock as her logical brain tried to understand what was happening.

He didn't answer her, but stood from where he sat and held out his hand, "It's time to go home, My Love."

Hermione looked at the outstretched hand and just as she started to reach out to him, hesitated. He saw her hesitation and smiled lovingly at her.

"It's okay, 'Mione" he nodded reassuringly, "Everyone is waiting and they can't wait to see you again. Trust me, My Love."

At his last comment, Hermione smiled, took his hand and stood from her chair. She immediately hugged him tight to her and enjoyed having him in her arms again. She released him and gasped when she saw her unwrinkled hand on his chest. She ran her hands on her face, felt the smooth skin and realized that she had transformed into a younger version of herself, the same age as Harry was in front of her. She looked down at her body and suddenly felt energetic and excited again like she had been when she was with him. She looked back up at Harry in wonder at the transformation.

He smiled and chuckled at her reaction, "You are beautiful," he gave her hand a soft squeeze.

She smiled at him and let him lead her to a suddenly bright doorway that appeared. The room around her began to become a brilliant white as she walked closer to the doorway. She suddenly paused, stopping them both just before walking through. She gave Harry a quick look that he immediately understood with a nod and smile. Still holding his hand, she turned back to see herself sitting in her chair and with a rush, her mind was suddenly flooded with memories from her life…

Getting her letter from Hogwarts…

Meeting Harry and Ron for the first time on the train…

Her first kiss with Harry…

Their wedding at The Burrow…

The birth of their three children…

The births of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren…

So many memories she saw again as if she was experiencing them for the first time. She let a tear of happiness fall as she was suddenly filled with joy as she knew… all those people she had loved were waiting for her. She would once again hug her parents, see Ron, Luna, Ginny and the rest of her friends and family, and she would finally meet Lily and James.

She looked around her home once more before her eyes fell upon the old woman in the chair. She gave her old self a smile, almost as if in thanks for such a wonderful life. Then with a deep breath of acceptance and a feeling of excitement, she turned back to the smiling and understanding face of her best friend… her lover… and her husband. With a loving smile on her lips for him equal to his own, she squeezed his hand with a nod, silently telling him that she was ready. Without a second's hesitation… they walked through the brilliantly white doorway hand-in-hand, together again and forever.

A few minutes later, the raven-haired girl returned.

"Sorry it took so long Nana," she said in an absent minded tone as she read the inside cover of the book, "Someone put it back in the wrong place."

She stopped when she received no reply and looked at the chair. She slowly closed the book and looked at her great-grandmother curiously, "Nana?" She saw Hermione looking like she was asleep in her chair, but with a soft smile on her face.

Harriet placed the book on the bed and gently shook her, "Nana? Did you fall asleep?"

After a moment, Harriet lightly put her fingers to Hermione's throat. A few seconds later she slowly lowered her hand and her eyes welled up with tears, "Oh Nana…," her voice choked up and then she started to cry.

She sat heavily on the edge of the bed and cried for a long while, looking at the soft smiling face of the woman who had not just been a hero to the wizarding world, but a woman who loved and cherished her family. She wiped the tears from her eyes and stood, knowing that she needed to get help and to tell her family that the woman she had idolized since as long as she could remember had passed away. She grabbed the book from the bed, but as she turned to leave, she saw the glint of something golden in her Nana's hand. Her face twisted in a confused curiosity. She was quite certain that Nana Hermione wasn't holding anything when she had left to get the book. She leaned over and gently removed the golden sphere from Hermione's hand and gasped quietly when she recognized it.

She turned over the golden snitch in her hand, and then smiled when she saw the writing that had just appeared on it.

"_I open at the close"_

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A/N: That's it! I hope you have enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I want to thank all the readers who have read this story and thanks to those that reviewed it. It was great to get your encouraging words! Again, I would like to sincerely thank Felicity Danverss as my beta reader for this story. If you did enjoy this story, it's because she helped make it better. And lastly… thanks always and forever to JKR who brought Harry to life, and I am grateful to be able to play in a small corner of that sandbox.


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